Appointment tomorrow! anxious to share truth! Help!!!

[bumblebee95]

Greetings all,
I have been recently engaging in risk-taking behaviour, missing injections for weight loss (many of you refer to this as diabulimia) and to deal with guilt. A few cool peeps on this forum told me to pluck up the courage and reach out to my diabetes care team...
...But I am rather the opposite of courageous!!
I have an appointment with my Doctor tomorrow and I don't know what to say! I have non-existent blood glucose recordings to give him which tends to be the ice-breaker at normal appointments- I haven't checked my blood glucose levels at all.. I have totally let this spiral out of control!!
I don't know how to reach out and tell them what I have been going through. It makes me weak in the knees to think about the appointment tomorrow! I feel like they will be ruthless and blame me!
Please help by giving suggestions!
Thanks!

It would be nice spelled out to me too!

 

[jack412]

no need to get on a guilt trip... you are not the first and you wont be the last patient that has told the Dr they are having a hard time with diabetes, missing injections to lose weight even has a name, which you know.
print your post or write something else down and give it to him as a note. that will take the choking feeling out of your throat as you try to find the words.
you may find the hospital clinic have councillors and such. A referral to that may be the way to go and be suggested by the Dr.
there is also the phone care line, when ever you are down
http://www.diabetes.org.uk/guide-to-diabetes/Teens/help-and-support/we-can-help/careline/

if not taking your insulin is your main symptom, have you read about LCHF diet that a lot of T2 and some T1 are on to lose or manage weight and keep the BG nice on the least amount of insulin?

carbs can get some people to binge [this was my problem]
http://lowcarbdiets.about.com/od/lowcarbliving/a/Food-Cravings.htm

 

[Squire Fulwood]

I was talking to my DN about low carbing (I am T2) and I told her I read a letter from a woman who said her son (T1) had been low carbing. She said that it meant he needed much less insulin and was less prone to mistakes in his dosage. My DN said that the problem with this is that it causes weight loss and many T1's are too thin already.

A couple of T1's have been on this forum recently with exactly this problem and we discussed what to eat to maintain weight etc.

What has this got to do with you? Well you don't sound thin so it would be a golden opportunity for you to try low carbing to see if you can lose weight without missing injections and maybe not need so much insulin in the first place.

I don't know your circumstances so I can't press you to do this but it might be worth a try for awhile to see if it helps.

 

[CarbsRok]

Greetings all,
I have been recently engaging in risk-taking behaviour, missing injections for weight loss (many of you refer to this as diabulimia) and to deal with guilt. A few cool peeps on this forum told me to pluck up the courage and reach out to my diabetes care team...
...But I am rather the opposite of courageous!!
I have an appointment with my Doctor tomorrow and I don't know what to say! I have non-existent blood glucose recordings to give him which tends to be the ice-breaker at normal appointments- I haven't checked my blood glucose levels at all.. I have totally let this spiral out of control!!
I don't know how to reach out and tell them what I have been going through. It makes me weak in the knees to think about the appointment tomorrow! I feel like they will be ruthless and blame me!
Please help by giving suggestions!
Thanks!

It would be nice spelled out to me too!

Hi bumblebee, how would you feel about writing everything down as you have here and handing it to your Dr? This would help both of you to find a way of helping you.
You have taken the first steps and admitted that you have a problem and need help, which is very positive. I'm sure you will be fine at the apt.

 

[AndBreathe]

Greetings all,
I have been recently engaging in risk-taking behaviour, missing injections for weight loss (many of you refer to this as diabulimia) and to deal with guilt. A few cool peeps on this forum told me to pluck up the courage and reach out to my diabetes care team...
...But I am rather the opposite of courageous!!
I have an appointment with my Doctor tomorrow and I don't know what to say! I have non-existent blood glucose recordings to give him which tends to be the ice-breaker at normal appointments- I haven't checked my blood glucose levels at all.. I have totally let this spiral out of control!!
I don't know how to reach out and tell them what I have been going through. It makes me weak in the knees to think about the appointment tomorrow! I feel like they will be ruthless and blame me!
Please help by giving suggestions!
Thanks!

It would be nice spelled out to me too!

@bumblebee95 - My interpretation of your post is you feel you may be unable to tell your Doc that you haven't been looking after yourself very well, rather than asking for dietary advice? I'll respond on that basis. Of course, the thing is, it's always so simple looking at other people's lives, from the outside. We all know what other people should do, but it's not always so easy to do for ourselves?

I think once you get there it might be easier than you think. If I think what happens when I go to see my Doc, as I go in, he usually says hello and asks how I am. For some reason I always say, "fine" or "great" or "fabulous", but, hello? Why am I there? Having said that, I usually have to follow up by saying, "well, actually I have a scabby leg/sore throat/broken head, or whatever. So, your immediate opening is from the "How's it going" question. Just respond by something like, "well, it's not going according to plan", or "it's been better", and then I'm sure he/she will open the conversation to let you talk.

May yourself some notes before you go, so that if your mind goes blank or the words just won't come out (that sometimes happens to me under extreme stress), you could always just show him the notes, and he'd get the jist. Your notes could just be a list of headings with some notes, something like:

Meter Reading: Scant. Have tested erratically/rarely/never, over the pas x months
Insulin use: Regularly missed injections, due to a driving desire to lose weight. Can't mak myself inject regularly.
Diet: Whatever.

You get the drift?

If he/she seems disappointed in you or reads the riot act, it's probably because he's saddened tha you're finding things so difficult, and understands how some of these cycles are difficult to break.

I feel for you. Some of our life management, beit diabetes, appropriate diet, alcohol, drugs, depression, energy is all about habit and patterns. We get into a rut, and getting out of that rut is hard. A bit like driving in frozen, rutted snow. You don't have to move far to be out of the rut, but it's very tricky to do, without veering off into another dangerous situation.

I would suggest initially you just try to do a bit better, but do a bit better consistently. That creates a new habit and could be sustainable. Once you have a margin of improvement, it's easier to tweak it a bit more.

You've done the hardest part by making the appointment, so keep it, and just go with the flow. I hope you will be surprised by the support you receive. You're not the first, and you won't be the last to find diabetes overwhelming, but you have the desire to change.

Good luck and let us know how you get on.

 

[Robinredbreast]

Hi bumblebee, how would you feel about writing everything down as you have here and handing it to your Dr? This would help both of you to find a way of helping you.
You have taken the first steps and admitted that you have a problem and need help, which is very positive. I'm sure you will be fine at the apt.

Hi some good advice here, it's the unknown that's the scariest. Your GP is there for help, support and guidance. It probably wont be that bad, honestly.. Write a few things down, go in with confidence, head held high, lots of deep breaths and be honest. Doctors have heard many things in their time and nothing is taboo, so try not to feel bad. Help is there for you. Please let us know how you get on, you are in our thoughts. Take care RRB and good luck

 

[dtennant9]

I would agree with one of the other posts above, why not print out your post and take it along. Your taking the first step by recognising the issues that you have and by making an appointment. There's just the one last wee hurdle to get over.

 

[bumblebee95]

So! I went to my appointment. I broke down in tears but my doctor was really understanding. We are taking baby steps in the right direction! Thank you all guys! X

 

[Heathenlass]

Well done you !

You took that first step which was brave of you, and you will get loads of support from us lot and also the Doc . Are you being referred to a diabetes clinic ?

Signy

 

[bumblebee95]

I already attend a clinic specific to young adults and the consultant seemed like it wasn't his first time dealing with it so I am relieved and maybe a little embarassed... But nonetheless.. Some of the pressure I bottled up has been released! I feel close to happy

 

[jack412]

that is really good news. As you say, just sharing it with people makes it feel better. It's easy to get things so big that you can't even look at it.
It may take a little while, but I can't wait till you share a new recipe with us

 

[shedges]

Well done @bumblebee95 - great progress. There's always someone here for you ... even in the middle of the night.

 

[Type1justine33years]

@bumblebee95 I discovered from a teenage girl at the time that I could lose weight by missing my injections. I was so stupid I told all my friends that I was doing it and I explained " if you had a switch to lose a stone before your holiday (to Ibiza) would you press it". They all tried to say they wouldn't but I knew they would. Anyway 2 months later I was in hospital and I swear on my life I thought I was going to die ! I thought I will never do this as long as I live. I am still 2 stone overweight but I can lose it with a better carb and exercise control. I can honestly say it's in the back of my mind when I have a big event coming up , but I know I would never mess again. TBH wish I had never been told about it ps glad you admitted to yourself I taken it on as if I was managing my diabetes perfectly before I was rushed into hospital.