Yes it's funny how we can see ourselves in others .. I can completely shut down and sleep in an effort to avoid admitting I have a problem. Lucky the wife knows this and now seems to have ways of stopping me doing this. Molly needs to find a way into her OH's problems .. Untill he's ready to fight for his health there little Molly can do. The wife call my shutdown moods as the great give up ... That's it I just get overwhelmed and give up ... Only when I am shown that the problem can be broken down in to small achivable chunks, can I come out of my shell and fight ... Rather than sleep away the problemEnclave that's very similar to my oh too. Same with heart problems and 17 years and 1 child later...
We're all stronger than we realise but Sometimes we need something to fight for to turn the situation around.
Hope the DSN can help on Weds...Seems a bit better today....more like himself...latest blood sugar reading was 13.4 so has come down from extremes of yesterday.....panic over for now at least....
Spoke to pharmacist for advice....will keep an eye on situation over the next few days and discuss with diabetic nurse at appointment already booked for middle of next week...
Thanks for all the messages, advice and support....
Just got home at 2pm after being out this morning ....and he is still in bed....says he can't get up....won't have blood sugar levels checked...
....he reckons it is because he ate a couple of cakes last night (purchased because my mum and dad popped round....don't usually have cakes in the house).....also found remnants of chocolate bar (.....have now moved location of my chocolate treats)
.....so basically self inflicted........current sympathy level is at rock bottom....but determined not to get stressed over it...
...and to add to that he has not had his medication for this morning..........
Getting to the point where I don't know what to do....other than just let him get on with it....
........ and you are considering marrying this man?
Hi Molly, I understand the 'self destruct button' it can be overwhelming, it can make people very selfish and self centered as he seems to be.
Is he aware of all the posting on this site and messages about him and the worry & problems he is causing you?
Maybe if he isn't aware, he should be made aware of all the distress and shown a few of the postings, just a suggestion.
It is all very sad, stay in there...................
Neil
I believe Molly has elected not to share this forum with her OH. There is a good chance he feels so overwhelmed with his health problems he's not able to think how Molly is feeling. Therefor he's not being anything other than overwhelmed with his failing health.I would say he was aware and fully aware at that............................... so shocking, poor Molly
I believe Molly has elected not to share this forum with her OH. There is a good chance he feels so overwhelmed with his health problems he's not able to think how Molly is feeling.
I fully aggree, Molly is facing a huge challange to pull her OH out of the decline he is now in.Hi Enclave, I probably agree, but until Molly replies this is just speculation.....I am at a loss as to what would start this man on the road to recovery. He is obviously, or appears to be, very depressed and maybe that's the area that needs treating first, before he will make any sense of anything.
Neil
Hi Molly, if he has arthritis (or even thinks he has) the "cure" is exercise. Could you speak to the Dr and get him to refer your OH to physio and they will give him exercises that will be OK for him to do? I have osteopaenia and osteoarthritis and was recently diagnosed as type 2 after my free NHS health check - a complete shock to me as I had no symptoms. I asked to be referred to a physio for my osteoarthritis rather than a hip replacement which was the other option and the exercises to strengthen my core muscles have made such a difference to me. I know I was starting from a fairly active point but he can start from where he is and gradually increase his level of activity and it may be the spur he needs to become a bit more active. I went three times at two week intervals, then after a month and it is now my last visit at two months at the end of December and we will assess whether I need a hip replacement now.
Good luck, it must be so frustrating for you. I know as my husband drinks too much, gets very little exercise, eats all the wrong things etc and won't go for his free health check so now I just let him get on with it; I am sick of hearing myself saying he should cut down his drinking etc. At present he appears to be fine but then I thought I was until I had my health check![
As I have only read a few posts being new to the forum I just read the post where he suggested you marry him.
If it is what you want throw your arms around him and say "yes, yes, a thousand times yes" and then you can start to plan. Does he need to lose weight, if so, start his diet without him realising too much? Tell him he needs to fit for the big day. Leave him a heat in the microwave lunch which has no carbs but meat and green veg or a chicken curry (low sugar sauce) and vegetable side dish. Nuts are a great snack if he doesn't eat too many, healthy and stop hunger, just don't eat too many.
Let us know how you get on this Wednesday.
I have just sent off for some Syntra5 tablets from the US having read a lot about them and their amazing effects on diabetes as I would like to turn my diabetes around and get off meds. I realise I am in a different position from him but I will let you know how I get on with them and if they do what it says on the tin!
I believe Molly has elected not to share this forum with her OH. There is a good chance he feels so overwhelmed with his health problems he's not able to think how Molly is feeling. Therefor he's not being anything other than overwhelmed with his failing health.
I worry Molly, that he has said he cannot get up ... Is this due to his state of mind or pain ?