Bonkers 1970's track titles

jay hay-char

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It's become clear, from several music threads on here, that there are a number of people who spent their 1970's teenage years in dark, joss-stick scented rooms listening to assorted practitioners of prog rock, an art form where loads of musicians took themselves far too seriously, and produced concept albums, played in complex time signatures, mostly about the mating habits of caddis fly larvae (yes; I know larvae can't mate :p)

One of the most endearing aspects of this foolishness was the names that were chosen for tracks by some of the more esoteric bands. Someone has already mentioned the Floyd, with the immortal "Several species of small furry animals, gathered together in a cave and grooving with a Pict" but there were many, many others.

Here's a few that I remember particularly fondly:

Squeezing sponges over Policemen's heads - Gong
Wet cheese delirium - also Gong
Mummy was an asteroid, Daddy was a small, non-stick kitchen utensil - Quiet Sun
Big John Wayne socks psychology on the jaw - Hatfield and the North

Any more nominations?
 
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chris lowe

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It's become clear, from several music threads on here, that there are a number of people who spent their 1970's teenage years in dark, joss-stick scented rooms listening to assorted practitioners of prog rock, an art form where loads of musicians took themselves far too seriously, and produced concept albums, played in complex time signatures, mostly about the mating habits of caddis fly larvae (yes; I know larvae can't mate :p)

One of the most endearing aspects of this foolishness was the names that were chosen for tracks by some of the more esoteric bands. Someone has already mentioned the Floyd, with the immortal "Several species of small furry animals, gathered together in a cave and grooving with a Pict" but there were many, many others.

Here's a few that I remember particularly fondly:

Squeezing sponges over Policemen's heads - Gong
Wet cheese delirium - also Gong
Mummy was an asteroid, Daddy was a small, non-stick kitchen utensil - Quiet Sun
Big John Wayne socks psychology on the jaw - Hatfield and the North

Any more nominations?
That was me with several species etc. I'm a bit worried that you seem to know how I spent the 70"s, For out there tracks, look no further than Tyrranosaurus Rex (pre sparkles) Salamander Palaganda. My People Were Fair and Had Sky in Their Hair... But now They're Content to Wear Stars on Their Brows,. King Crimson 21st Century Schitzoid Man. Purple Gang Granny Takes a Trip (banned by BBC as they thought it was about drugs but obviously didn't bother to listen to it.
 
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julifriend

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I'd have to start with Caravan's If I Could Do It All Over Again, I'd Do It All Over You.
 
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Clivethedrive

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Sure wish i could shimy like my sister arthur..by the shadows
 

sanguine

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Matching Mole - "Beer as in Braindeer", and "Nan True's Hole" (whaaaat?).

Also from the Hatfields - "Son of 'There's No Place Like Homerton'", and "Lobster Cleavage Probe"

Van der Graaf Generator - "A Plague of Lighthouse Keepers"

Move into the 80s and you could nominate virtually the entire catalogue of Rip Rig & Panic ... such as

Wilhelm Show Me The Diagram (Function of the Orgasm)
Those Eskimo Women Speak Frankly
Bob Hope Takes Risks
Epi Epi Arp WOOSH!
Another Tampon up the Ar$e of Humanity
Here Gathers Nameless Energy (Volcanoes Covered by Snow)
She Gets So Hungry at Night She Eats Her Jewellery

And others that are just funny rather than (or as well as) bonkers:

Specials AKA - "The thing I like most about you is your girlfriend" (love that!)
Half Man Half Biscuit - "All I want for Christmas is a Dukla Prague Away Kit"
 
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jay hay-char

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Matching Mole - "Beer as in Braindeer", and "Nan True's Hole" (whaaaat?).

Also from the Hatfields - "Son of 'There's No Place Like Homerton'", and "Lobster Cleavage Probe"

Van der Graaf Generator - "A Plague of Lighthouse Keepers"

Move into the 80s and you could nominate virtually the entire catalogue of Rip Rig & Panic ... such as

Wilhelm Show Me The Diagram (Function of the Orgasm)
Those Eskimo Women Speak Frankly
Bob Hope Takes Risks
Epi Epi Arp WOOSH!
Another Tampon up the Ar$e of Humanity
Here Gathers Nameless Energy (Volcanoes Covered by Snow)
She Gets So Hungry at Night She Eats Her Jewellery

And others that are just funny rather than (or as well as) bonkers:

Specials AKA - "The thing I like most about you is your girlfriend" (love that!)
Half Man Half Biscuit - "All I want for Christmas is a Dukla Prague Away Kit"
This is excellent :)

Talking of Half Man, Half Biscuit, who could forget The Trumpton Riots? :D
 

JTL

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I'm sure there's more.
That was me with several species etc. I'm a bit worried that you seem to know how I spent the 70"s, For out there tracks, look no further than Tyrranosaurus Rex (pre sparkles) Salamander Palaganda. My People Were Fair and Had Sky in Their Hair... But now They're Content to Wear Stars on Their Brows,. King Crimson 21st Century Schitzoid Man. Purple Gang Granny Takes a Trip (banned by BBC as they thought it was about drugs but obviously didn't bother to listen to it.
I knew the founder of Purple gang .... Tony Davies from Heaton Moor Stockport.
They used to get high and play to a local audience in the basement of a Victorian house converted to flats two or three times a week just because
all that red leb and California Blue!!!!!
 
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JTL

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I'm sure there's more.
Mouldy old dough.
 
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rowan

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They're Coming to Take me Away haha - Napoleon XIV (Might be 60s?)
Intergalactive lavatory - Donovan
Don't eat the yellow snow - Frank Zappa
 
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Yorksman

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Don't eat the yellow snow - Frank Zappa

That's sparked off a memory: Weasels Ripped My Flesh

Frank_Zappa_Weasels_Ripped_My_Flesh.jpg
 
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jay hay-char

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I'd forgotten about Zappa; you could have a whole thread devoted to him, most of it disturbingly scatological.
My favourite is Who Are The Brain Police? :D
.... closely followed by "The Illinois Enema Bandit" (a real person, as it goes: truly a case of "you couldn't make it up") :)
 
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sanguine

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Brand X:

Smacks of Euphoric Hysteria
Why Should I Lend You Mine (When You've Broken Yours Off Already)
... Maybe I'll Lend You Mine After All
Algon (Where an Ordinary Cup of Drinking Chocolate Costs £8,000,000,000)
 

julifriend

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Okay, I know it's not a 1970's track but 1969 is close enough, therefore I offer you Pink Floyd's:

"Several Species of Small Furry Animals Gathered Together in a Cave and Grooving with a Pict"
 

Clivethedrive

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Okay, I know it's not a 1970's track but 1969 is close enough, therefore I offer you Pink Floyd's:

"Several Species of Small Furry Animals Gathered Together in a Cave and Grooving with a Pict"
What a title !
 
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chris lowe

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Captain Beefheart Trout Mask Replica the cover was someone in a suit with a yucky trout mask on their head
 

satindoll

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There were some great one in the 50s like Tom Lehrer Poisoning Pigeons In The Park or The Masochoism Tango or It Makes A Fellow Proud to be A Soldier.
 

rowan

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And even earlier than that - Does Your Chewing Gun Lose Its Flavour On The Bedpost Overnight?
 

Yorksman

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'Dehypnotised Toothpaste' and 'A Short Stop at the Transylvanian Brain Surgery' from Amon Düül's Dance of the Lemmings.