1. Get the Diabetes Forum App for your phone - available on iOS and Android.
    Dismiss Notice
  2. Guest, we'd love to know what you think about the forum! Take the Diabetes Forum Survey 2017 »
    Dismiss Notice
Dismiss Notice
Find support, ask questions and share your experiences. Join the community »

ANNOYING PEOPLE

Discussion in 'Diabetes Soapbox - Have Your Say' started by derry60, Jul 3, 2017.

  1. Hotpepper20000

    Hotpepper20000 · Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    713
    Likes Received:
    501
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Other then Mr Hotpepper and a very close childhood friend I do not talk about what I eat or don't eat.
    When I'm questioned I just say I feel better when I don't eat "XYZ" then I change the subject.
    I have no problem just picking what I can eat when I'm invited to someone's house for a meal. And if there's very little that's ok too. I still have enough reserves that one meal less won't make me waste away.

    What other people eat is non of my business and what I eat is non of theirs.
     
    • Agree Agree x 5
  2. derry60

    derry60 Prediabetes · Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    406
    Likes Received:
    195
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Remember not to be near her if you every have a hypo :banghead::banghead: Actually that is kind of scary.
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
  3. dbr10

    dbr10 Type 2 · Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,317
    Likes Received:
    811
    Trophy Points:
    173
    People are stupid. The ones who know nothing about diabetes think they are experts. Friends should support you, not undermine you.
     
    • Agree Agree x 3
  4. serenity648

    serenity648 Type 2 · Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,105
    Likes Received:
    1,067
    Trophy Points:
    178
    it was intended to be said with a wink, or followed with a suggestive eyebrow wiggle : )
     
    • Like Like x 2
  5. satindoll

    satindoll Type 2 · Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    3,497
    Likes Received:
    13,541
    Trophy Points:
    178
    Don't know about other insulin dependant diabetics.....but I take mine with me everywhere........I would no more leave home without it or my meter than go out without locking the front door.....:stop:
     
    • Agree Agree x 4
    • Like Like x 1
  6. therower

    therower Type 1 · Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,409
    Likes Received:
    1,699
    Trophy Points:
    178
    Have heard my fair share of annoying comments and suggestions regarding my diabetes and how I should do things.
    But I'm going to try and give the view from the non-diabetic perspective, especially regarding hypos.
    1st I tell people I inject insulin, it's vitally important and keeps me alive.
    2nd I tell people I don't eat sweets/ chocolate or consume anything with an excessive amount of sugar. It's bad for my health.
    I actually go into more detail but most people pick up on these two points.
    Jump forward to a full on hypo.
    I'm on the floor, incoherent, sweating, pale, clammy and maybe even in and out of consciousness.
    My friend the non-diabetic wants to help, he knows I'm diabetic.
    He remembers 2 important bits of information I've given him/her.
    1 Insulin, it's vitally important, it has to be injected, it keeps him alive AND at this very moment in time I look like I'm going to die.
    2 Piece of chocolate or sugary drink, definitely not medicinal, I never eat it or drink it, it's bad for me, anyone can see a handful of jelly babies ain't going to save my life.
    A lot by the very nature of the situation will go option 1.
    My point is be careful how you describe your diabetes to people and how you manage it. In an emergency people only recall the "buzz words ".
    Fortunately I've educated most people I spend my time with and even if they don't assist me one day, they may help someone else.
     
    • Like Like x 5
    • Winner Winner x 5
    • Agree Agree x 3
  7. Antje77

    Antje77 LADA · Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    169
    Likes Received:
    107
    Trophy Points:
    63
    I've only been diagnosed for about six months, so I've had the 'one piece of cake won't hurt' only once up to now. My response was 'How would having them hack off my feet from eating all the one pieces of cake don't hurt?' They haven't spoken to me since. Maybe I need a softer approach.
     
    • Like Like x 3
    • Funny Funny x 3
  8. Snapsy

    Snapsy Type 1 · Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    2,321
    Likes Received:
    2,498
    Trophy Points:
    198
    Blimey, @therower thank you so much for this post. I had never even thought about it that way round. :wideyed:
    THANK YOU.
    :)
     
    • Agree Agree x 2
    • Like Like x 1
  9. Bon83

    Bon83 Type 1 · Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    236
    Likes Received:
    156
    Trophy Points:
    63
    I am probably guilty of thinking everybody knows everything. I grew up with my dad being type 1 even as a 4 year old I knew what hypo meant and that lucozade tablets aren't sweets don't eat em all.
     
    • Like Like x 2
  10. Fleegle

    Fleegle Type 2 · Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    651
    Likes Received:
    848
    Trophy Points:
    113
    If they meant to offend then that isn't very good but I agree with you @noblehead because I knew very little about diabetes even six months ago and whilst I knew sugar was not ideal I didn't realise near zero. I hate to think what I might have suggested as a result of my ignorance but never meant to offend.
     
    • Like Like x 4
    • Agree Agree x 1
  11. noblehead

    noblehead Type 1 · Guru
    Retired Moderator

    Messages:
    23,714
    Likes Received:
    19,869
    Trophy Points:
    278
    Agreed @Fleegle , diabetes is like any other life-long condition, we know so little about them and we only find out the true extent of living with the condition once we have been diagnosed.

    Personally I prefer to see the good in people rather than the bad.............hence my comment earlier :)
     
    • Like Like x 4
  12. donnellysdogs

    donnellysdogs Type 1 · Master

    Messages:
    12,506
    Likes Received:
    12,051
    Trophy Points:
    298
    I think eating for a lot of people is a sensitive subject. Not just diabetes.

    Please be aware that there are others that have also had throat or neck cancers, or bowel/stomach, and some people are tube fed from gastroparesis etc.

    Diabetics are not the only people that have to put up wirh insensitive comments with illness/disease.

    We cant stop people making stupid comments, we can try our best to educate. Most wont understand until they get a critical illness at some point.

    Please dont be put off with comments from others, for anything. Just try to educate if you can...
     
    • Agree Agree x 4
    • Like Like x 2
    • Informative Informative x 1
  13. noblehead

    noblehead Type 1 · Guru
    Retired Moderator

    Messages:
    23,714
    Likes Received:
    19,869
    Trophy Points:
    278
    On a pump now so no say in the matter of carrying insulin around @Pinkorchid

    However on injections I didn't always carry insulin pens, if I was going out for a walk I would just carry some fast-acting glucose and maybe my bg meter (depending on the duration of the walk).
     
  14. lovinglife

    lovinglife Type 2 · Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,995
    Likes Received:
    1,834
    Trophy Points:
    198
    I've never really had this from friends and family, maybe from an acquaintance at the very beginning but other than that nothing - which tells me it's one of two things.
    1) I have very good friends and family who are considerate of my privacy and my choices are mine and none of their business
    OR
    2) my friends and family couldn't care less about me and couldn't give a s**t what happens to me!

    I sincerely hope it's number 1hahaha
     
    • Funny Funny x 3
    • Like Like x 2
    • Agree Agree x 1
  15. Element137

    Element137 Type 2 · Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    101
    Likes Received:
    98
    Trophy Points:
    48
    I find the best approach is to smile, be polite, and forgive people for their ignorance - Shamefully, I was as bad before diagnosis, despite the fact that my mom and brother both were T2. We care because we have to, we get educated to survive, I forgive people for the fact they don't need to worry about it - a lot of the ignorance stems from the exceptional job big food industry does misleading people as to what's healthy. At work, I get faced with this scenario every week, in a meeting, biscuits appear, the same person each week will apologise for eating biscuits in front of me and ask if I would prefer for them to be removed, in one respect its nice they stop and consider, but I keep explaining that I am not about to jump over the table and gorge on the biscuits-and I really don't want people feeling they cant eat stuff in front of me- I really couldn't care less what other people eat - I also get asked on a regular basis if I have 'eaten OK' when I have politely asked what they mean - ''you know, at the right time ?'' - again - well intended- so I take no offence - try and see the funny side is my view, and then come here and rant amongst the folk that really understand :)
     
    • Like Like x 3
  16. Brunneria

    Brunneria Other · Moderator
    Staff Member

    Messages:
    13,661
    Likes Received:
    27,529
    Trophy Points:
    278
    The only thing more annoying than the Know It All Non-Diabetic is the Born Again Zealot Who Must Educate The World About Their Diet/Religion/Medical Complaint.

    The root problem with both of them is the belief that other people are interested in what they have to say.
     
    • Agree Agree x 4
    • Like Like x 2
    • Winner Winner x 2
    • Funny Funny x 1
  17. dogslife

    dogslife Type 2 · Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    220
    Likes Received:
    2,423
    Trophy Points:
    158
    derry660: Most of my small family now leave it to me to eat as I think fit but rarely have anything suitable for me to drink at family get-togethers as I can't have alcohol or sugary drinks so I just take my own or ask for tea! My problem is my sugarholic mum who has memory problems and despite my being diagnosed over 12 years ago repeatedly offers me cakes every day and gets really upset if I won't have them. I know it is her generous, maternal nature to feed me but I cannot get her to understand and just have to keep telling her that I'm just not hungry. If this doesn't work I tell her that they will make me ill.
     
    • Hug Hug x 2
    #37 dogslife, Jul 6, 2017 at 8:48 AM
    Last edited: Jul 6, 2017
  18. Guzzler

    Guzzler Type 2 · Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,946
    Likes Received:
    1,719
    Trophy Points:
    158
    I havn't come across any of these situations yet, thankfully. But here, just as an experiment and without googling, say someone found me on the floor with speech slurred sometimes unresponsive, possibly vomiting and with strange movement. That someone finds a medical badge which tells them that I have Menieres Syndrome.... what does he/she or you do? And your time starts now.
    There are situations where many of us would struggle to decide what was best for someone in medical distress. The comments people have found annoying are just that, annoying. Educate the people who ask or who are unaware of the dangers and if they turn out to be the type of people who think they know better then just hope that they are not the ones who find you in a dangerous state.
    BTW If you find someone having a Menieres attack place them in the recovery position preferably on the floor and stay with them until the attack passes. Do not force them to eat or drink anything to avoid choking. If the attack lasts longer than thirty minutes then seek medical attention.
     
    • Like Like x 1
    • Useful Useful x 1
  19. AloeSvea

    AloeSvea Prediabetes · Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    819
    Likes Received:
    1,334
    Trophy Points:
    158
    One of my own lines re non-diabetics commenting on my food choices, amongst friends and family who ask me "Are you allowed to eat this?" is, "I'm allowed to eat anything I want, I choose not to eat this so I don't die too early." It gets a good response, I find. Understanding, at least, as to what it's all about.

    Another one is, to people who don't understand treating T2D (the insulin resistant kind) with food and activity - rather than medication - is: "You know how they say 'diet and exercise'? when they talk about preventing diabetes, heart disease, strokes and so on? That's what they mean - the actual food you eat, and how fit you are. That's what I am doing."

    I know it's a lot for just not accepting a piece of cake! But with longterm relationships, in my experience in any case, if you have a longterm illness/dysfunction, and they do comment on what you are or are not eating - it's worth coming up with pithy or pertinent comments to make to them to gently get them to understand, and lay off of you, in the nicest possible way. It has worked with my nearest and dearest.

    Now, what Brunneria says about mass boredom response to a zealot-like intensity - ha! yes. I have been thinking about that a lot lately. Too true.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  20. GrantGam

    GrantGam Type 1 · Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    2,634
    Likes Received:
    1,561
    Trophy Points:
    178
    I'd sooner have someone who means well, offer me a piece of cake and inform me that it won't hurt - over a 'born again zealot' forcing me into the belief that potatoes or bread will ultimately be my demise. All day long. There are two sides to every story...

    As already mentioned, how is a non-diabetic to know the ins and outs of diabetes? I for one did not care, nor want to care, about diabetes before I became one myself. For that reason, it doesn't bother me if someone offers me a biscuit and gets confused when I say I can't because I don't have my insulin with me.

    Keep your friends, just because their not clued up on diabetes does not mean they're entirely useless:)
     
    • Agree Agree x 3
    • Like Like x 2
    #40 GrantGam, Jul 27, 2017 at 12:17 AM
    Last edited: Jul 27, 2017
  • Meet the Community

    Find support, connect with others, ask questions and share your experiences with people with diabetes, their carers and family.

    Did you know: 7 out of 10 people improve their understanding of diabetes within 6 months of being a Diabetes Forum member. Get the Diabetes Forum App and stay connected on iOS and Android

    Grab the app!
  • Tweet with us

  • Like us on Facebook