Diabetes, life and all that - personal diary

[whatdoesthisbuttondo]

Well done with the flower shots Pavlos.
I like the shallow depth of field shots to make the blooms stand out, and Im getting jealous of the Spring colours (and warmth!)

 

[pavlosn]

Hyacinth flowers in my garden

It's a lovely spring day this morning today with bright sunshine and comforting warmth.

I am taking the day off work as a will spend the morning helping my son with some light last minute revision. Emphasis on light as he will be taking the exams this afternoon! Really my main aim is to keep him focused and relaxed and stop him from tiring himself out by spending too much of his time playing video games.

To be honest, we are both treating today's exams as a bit of a trial run for the exams he will be taking on Saturday morning for admission to my own old school, which as he has now made clear is his own first choice for a place to study. It would still be nice, for his own morale if nothing else, if he did well in today's tests as well.

To be honest he has put in quite a bid of work for these exams so I would love too see him rewarded for it.

I am not sure that hard work always gets it's just reward in life but it is still a message and a lesson that I would like my son to take on board that nothing significant can be earned without working for it.

Have a great day everyone.

Pavlos


Sent from the Diabetes Forum App

 

[pavlosn]

The big day is tomorrow for my son, as he is taking the entrance exams for his school of choice.

I had the job of having to console him today and try to boost his morale after he got his results for yesterday's test for admission to a different school.

He "only" scored 93% in Maths when he thought that the paper was really easy. Truth is he was disappointed as he thought he should have scored 100%.

To be honest, I know that for him to rank high he needs for the paper to be difficult so that he can get away with the couple of careless mistakes he always seems to make, irrespective of the difficulty of the paper.

Bottom line is he has gained admittance to both the schools he has tried for so far, with a scholarship to one of them. So in reality he should be celebrating not be upset about not gaining a scholarship to a school he never intended to go anyway.

But the one that really counts for him is tomorrow's exam. Fingers crossed he is not disappointed.

P.

 

[Kezzer4321]

Hi Pavlos,
Will keep my fingers crossed that everything goes well for your son.
I am sure he will do fine

 

[pavlosn]

I guess this is new experience for both of us.

He is growing up and he is beginning to have his own fights to fight. I know this but there is still a part of me that just wants to protect him from any harm or disappointment.

In a way, so far, as parents we have had more or less complete control over his life. This of course can not and should not carry on but relinquishing the reigns and lowering the protective guard is not easy to do!

P.

 

[pavlosn]

Just returned from my old school where my son is currently sitting the entrance exams.

To be honest I was shocked at the arrangements put in place by the school. We were asked to arrive at the school car park where we found that the rest of the school's extensive grounds and premises were ribboned off and out of limits, a bid like a police crime scene, with a security guard in place at the only remaining point of entry. There was no welcome address by any member of staff and no attempt to ease the nerves and stress levels of the children or parents. The names of the children were called out and they were marched off into the exam centre, which was about two hundred meters away. The parents were then asked to depart and return back four hours later to collect their children.

No provision was made for the many parents that had actually travelled from out of town.

The whole experience felt cold and impersonal in the extreme, especially so in contrast to the warm reception we had at a different school two days ago. At that school, the headmaster of the school welcomed the kids and made a special effort to make them feel more at ease. While the kids were taking their exams there was a short presentation to the parents on the school and on the procedure to be followed in obtain the exam results, followed by a cocktail reception, where we had the chance to meet members of the teaching staff.

I know my son prefers today's school but I really am not so sure. Perhaps they think that their tougher approach is character building for the kids but I am not convinced. Today's school is the most prestigious and in demand school on the island and it seems to me that as they know this they are just not putting in the effort.

P.

 

[Pasha]

Yours emotions are those of an adult, how did your son find it?, maybe it didnt bother him because his perspective is less emotional.

 

[pavlosn]

Yours are the reaction of an adult, how did your son find it?, maybe it didnt bother him because his perspective is less emotional.

No idea Pasha, as he is still there taking the exams and will only get to see him in two and a half hours. I know he would have liked for me to have stayed around so as to see me during the break between papers. I have always been there for him whenever he was in similar situations in the past whether this was a school exam, maths competition or chess tournament. This is the first time he will find himself in such a testing situation and be completely on his own.

It seems that this approach by the school is not accidental. Talking to parents that already have children at the school, this particular school tends to treat its students more like adults from a younger age expecting them to sink or swim. Other schools market themselves on the grounds that they like to keep the family more informed and more part of the whole teaching experience. This school prides itself on promoting leadership ability and it seems this tougher approach is part of that.

We are talking about 11 year old kids though, many of them, my son included, from pampered and probably overprotective backgrounds.

I am stressed at the moment so probably overreacting anyway!

P.

 

[Mike d]

We are talking about 11 year old kids though, many of them, my son included, from pampered and probably overprotective backgrounds.

I am stressed at the moment so probably overreacting anyway!

Let it go if you can Pavlos. He'll be fine. The 11 year old of today is a LOT more grown up than the 11 year old you (or me) once were.

Your upbringing of your son (along with your wife) will stand him in far greater stead than any education. One flows from the other.

 

[Pasha]

I also thought that the school did what it did on purpose. To signal to the children and their parents that now is the time to see how things work out when removed from their comfort zone.

I look forward to hearing how you BOTH get through this ordeal, and hope of course that you both pass your different exams with flying colours.

 

[pavlosn]

Let it go if you can Pavlos. He'll be fine. The 11 year old of today is a LOT more grown up than the 11 year old you (or me) once were.

Your upbringing of your son (along with your wife) will stand him in far greater stead than any education. One flows from the other.

Mike

I suspect that part of my reaction is that, I feel an emotional bond to the particular school as it was the place where I studied and where my dad studied before me.

So since the place is special to me, part of me expects that I should be special to it. But how could I be. None of my old teachers are still there, it was all too long ago for that. So the bond is only one way and like any lover who finds that his feelings are not reciprocated I react with disappointment.

This is at one level but I hope that I am intelligent enough to recognize this and not let it cloud my judgement.

At another level, I am a parent who has to use his best judgement to select between schools that seem to have very different cultures and approaches to select what suits his child's talents and character. I am not finding this an easy task.

But the bottom line is that my son has expressed a clear preference for today's school.So if he does get in, and he continues to want to go there after he gets a chance to see the school at an open day on the 12th, this is the school he will end up in.
He has worked hard for this, do if successful, he deserves the right to make his own choice.

P.

 

[Mike d]

Mike

I suspect that part of my reaction is that, I feel an emotional bond to the particular school as it was the place where I studied and where my dad studied before me.

So since the place is special to me, part of me expects that I should be special to it. But how could I be. None of my old teachers are still there, it was all too long ago for that. So the bond is only one way and like any lover who finds that his feelings are not reciprocated I react with disappointment.

This is at one level but I hope that I am intelligent enough to recognize this and not let it cloud my judgement.

At another level, I am a parent who has to use his best judgement to select between schools that seem to have very different cultures and approaches to select what suits his child's talents and character. I am not finding this an easy task.

But the bottom line is that my son has expressed a clear preference for today's school.So if he does get in, and he continues to want to go there after he gets a chance to see the school at an open day on the 12th, this is the school he will end up in.
He has worked hard for this, do if successful, he deserves the right to make his own choice.

P.

I know... trust me, I know. A school is nothing without decent teachers and an education is nothing without work

 

[pavlosn]

It's all over now.

He is happy enough with how he did, although I was disappointed to hear that the maths paper was really easy again. With an easy paper my son does not have the chance to show his true capabilities in this area, which is a personal strength of his. Let's hope that he did enough to get through.

P.

 

[Pasha]

It's all over now.

He is happy enough with how he did, although I was disappointed to hear that the maths paper was really easy again. With an easy paper my son does not have the chance to show his true capabilities in this area, which is a personal strength of his. Let's hope that he did enough to get through.

P.

A good day, father and son both passed their tests, each in his own way. Perhaps a tougher learning cure for the former?.

 

[pavlosn]

A good day, father and son both passed their tests, each in his own way. Perhaps a tougher learning cure for the former?.

Results not out till tomorrow. Definitely not an easy day for me!

 

[pavlosn]

The stress of waiting for my son's results due out later on is a real torture.

He said that he did well but as he also says that the exam questions were easy, other kids that will have otherwise have done less well will also have done well. A harder paper would have favored my son's ability to think outside the box and apply what he knows to solve application questions. An easy paper does not test this skills but instead becomes a test of who is more careful and does not make silly little mistakes; not my son's strong point.

So I am worried. And to be honest more worried about him being disappointed than anything else. I am not convinced personally that this school is the best choice for him but he is absolutely convinced so he will be disappointed if he does not get in; more so if his friends do.

I guess now I know what it felt like for my parents every time I took exams. This waiting without being able to do anything to help really is most unpleasant.

At least I was able to sweat some of the stress away by taking a long 7,5k walk this morning.

We will be spending the day up in the mountains as I promised my son that we would visit the snow as soon as his exams are over. I do not know how much snow there is but we are going to go anyway.

At least by keeping busy we will not be thinking of the exam results so much.

P.

 

[Mike d]

We gotta get that stress out of you Pavlos. It is a que sera sera.

Do you not think that he might pick up on that and worry himself ? Life is not exams, even for an 11 year old ... you know that ... it is how you apply what you learn to a career he might not yet see.

You are one magnificent parent (as is your wife)) so ease up mate. You do NOT wanna be doing this thru his next 6 or 7 years. Things change.

Mike

 

[pavlosn]

We gotta get that stress out of you Pavlos. It is a que sera sera.

Do you not think that he might pick up on that and worry himself ? Life is not exams, even for an 11 year old ... you know that ... it is how you apply what you learn to a career he might not yet see.

You are one magnificent parent (as is your wife)) so ease up mate. You do NOT wanna be doing this thru his next 6 or 7 years. Things change.

Mike

Mike

In the grand scheme of things you are right.

But it is becoming increasingly clear that success in these exams is very important to my son.

Rightly or wrongly he wants this bad. He has been trying for it for a very long time and in a way he sees it as an an affirmation of his standing amongst his peers. I would hate to see him disappointed at such a tender age.

Does success in any exam or admission in any school guarantee success in the future. Of course not.

But this is the measure he now assesses himself by and so for his sake I hope he does not fall short.

I suppose that part of the stress derives from the fact that the exam paper, being too straight forward, did not give him the chance his areas of strength.

These are exams where there is no passing mark. It does not matter how well or badly you did in absolute terms. All that matters is how your performance ranks relative to our peers: the kids with the highest average scores from two tests, one in Maths and one in Greek will be offered places at the school.

Anyway, I am probably abusing this forum at the moment using it to write about something which is so far removed from the subject of diabetes.

Thanks for your thoughts.

P

 

[Mike d]

would hate to see him disappointed at such a tender age.

i was dux of my school at 17 but I failed (supposedly) a useless public service entrance exam three months later .... and trust me, they were easy.

Mike

 

[pavlosn]

All's well that....

My son did very well in his latest exams, gaining admission to his preferred school with an average score of 90,5 per cent from his two tests in Maths and Greek. The average such score amongst those kids that gained admission was 75 per cent. As expected he did very well in Maths, scoring 99 per cent against an average Maths score amongst successful candidates of 80 per cent.

Feeling very relieved and very proud.

He has now earned the right to chose from amongst three of the best schools in the country. I think his mind is already made up to follow in my and both his grandfathers's footsteps by choosing my old school.

I have my doubts that this is the best fit for him but I will not stop him from making his own choice.