Questions and Answers

Pura Vida

Well-Known Member
Messages
744
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Tablets (oral)
Questions and Answers from

Retired People

Q: Where can single men over the age of 70 find
younger women who are interested in them?


A: Try a bookstore, under
Fiction.


Q: What can a man do while his wife is going
Throughmenopause?

A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can
finish the basement. When you're done, you will have a place to
live.


Q: Someone has told me that menopause is
mentioned in the bible.


Is that true?
Where can it be
found?


A: Yes. Matthew 14:92:
"And Mary rode
Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt"


Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your
over-70 year-old husband?


A: Tell him you're
pregnant.


Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the
elderly wrinkles?


A: Take off your
glasses.


Q: Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet
and all those wrinkles on my face?


A: Go bra less. It will usually pull them
out!


Q: Why should 70-plus year old people use valet
parking?


A: Valets don't forget where they park your
car.


Q: Is it common for 70-plus year olds to have
problems with short term memory storage?


A: Storing memory is not a problem. Retrieving it
is the problem.


Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?

A: Yes, but usually in the
afternoon.


Q: Where should 70-plus year olds look for eye
glasses?


A: On their
foreheads.


Q: What is the most common remark made by 70-plus
year olds when they enter antique stores?


A: "Gosh, I remember
these!"


SMILE,
You've Still Got Your Sense Of
Humor, Haven't You?














"To one who has faith, no explanation is necessary. To one without faith, no explanation is possible."

--St. Thomas Aquinas








"Indeed I tremble for my country when I reflect that God is just: that his justice cannot sleep for ever." --Thomas Jefferson, Notes on the State of Virginia, Query 18, 1781
 

Robbity

Expert
Messages
6,683
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Diet only
I'm well pat 70, and those over 70s comments don't apply to me - just what am I doing wrong?? :wideyed:o_O
 
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