Hello

gazzab

Active Member
Messages
31
Type of diabetes
Type 2
All I can say buddy is, if you have metformin, take it, if you are drinking, stop it, go on a low carb diet, lose a few pounds and you will lower your blood glucose, you might feel like xxxx but I don't suppose your son is thrilled either, at 15 he needs you, his head must also be spinning, and watching you go down must be real bad for him, and if you do nothing, he will be faced at a young age with being alone. So pull up yer socks, shake your feathers and get on with it. Put yourself in your sons shoes, would you want to wear them?

I don't know all the answers, all I can say is look at your problems, can you fix them, if the answer is not today, lock them away and get on with it, in a few days unlock them, can you deal with some of them? Fine do it, if not lick them away again.

Your son needs you, and in a few years so will your grandchildren, if you want to go to his wedding, and in the future hold your grandchildren in your arms, then today is as good a day as you will get to start turning things around. Take your metformin. If you don't have any, get some on Monday.
Thanks Greg,

I dont drink or do drugs never really been in to either other than some prescrition drugs and over the counter painkillers never tried anything, saw my dad drink 12 pints a night for years and years it just never interested me apart from the all teenager to 20 something nights out. My son doesnt know hwo i feel as i want him to concentrate on his schooling so he can have a good career and have a happy life without worrying about me.

I dont think its any specific problems that i can relate it to, I had a decent happy upbringing and you would think being diabetic for about 15 years i would be able to handle it but i have never really had control of my diabetes even when taking tablets lets face it diabetes is quite hidden until its too late. A person i was speaking to explaining how i feel suggested it could be fybromyalgia but i have known lots of people suggest different things icluding rheumatoid arthritis.
 

gazzab

Active Member
Messages
31
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Hi Gary & welcome.
I think you've come to the right place. You will get lots of support and practical advice here. It sounds as though you've had a few turmoils the past couple of years and those mount up on your health. I think you already appreciate that diabetes is at the root of a lot of the problems, so let's see what the good folks here can do for you. But the start of your turnaround is to recognise the mental depression is medical, that you will need to approach your path to health and happiness again with positivity and perseverance.
So, with regards to your T2d control, tell us how you monitor it - are you testing your blood glucose at the moment? If not, persuade your GP that you have serious problems that you want to address and that you think tracking it, even if you test once a day, is part if the fix. With luck, they'll prescribe you one; if not, get a cheap one like SD code free or similar.
Secondly, what is your diet like? Do you cook for yourself? Drink? What about exercise?
I appreciate these are all repeats of what the doc has probably already ask you, but we can dispense top tips in abundance.
Lastly, would your son help you out if he thought he would get a happy dad back?

The last time i checked glucose levels it was at 16.1
I dont monitor it because i know it is going to be high so that test was the only test i have done for 18 months
cooking is microwave meals or snacking on anything close to hand. i very occasionalylike once every few weeks i go and get a haircut walking to the barbers is the most i do. I tend to drink water that has been cooled in the fridge with the occasional bottle of pepsi max. I dont even go shopping having groceries delivered, empty fridge other than milk and butter and loads of freezer meals in freezer.

My son hasnta clue how i feel as i put on a happy face when he is around most of the time he is on his pc or out with his friends. When he is i have a big show on how i am ok. I dont intend on spoiling his last year of school and potentioal exam results just because his dad is a waste of space.
 

Mike d

Expert
Messages
7,997
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Other
Dislikes
idiots who will not learn
Nothing I can add to the already great advice already given. Please be kind to yourself ... and your son.

Victories right there. He needs his dad.
 

Bertyboy

Well-Known Member
Messages
215
Type of diabetes
Type 1
The last time i checked glucose levels it was at 16.1
I dont monitor it because i know it is going to be high so that test was the only test i have done for 18 months
cooking is microwave meals or snacking on anything close to hand. i very occasionalylike once every few weeks i go and get a haircut walking to the barbers is the most i do. I tend to drink water that has been cooled in the fridge with the occasional bottle of pepsi max. I dont even go shopping having groceries delivered, empty fridge other than milk and butter and loads of freezer meals in freezer.

My son hasnta clue how i feel as i put on a happy face when he is around most of the time he is on his pc or out with his friends. When he is i have a big show on how i am ok. I dont intend on spoiling his last year of school and potentioal exam results just because his dad is a waste of space.
OK, thanks. Well the good starting point is that you don't drink. That has been my achilles heel - I feel the need to drink as what I perceive as the only way to wind down. Giving it up has been difficult for me, but, hand-in-hand with medication and dietary change, I am starting to feel human again.
The other good starting point is that with those sort of levels, we know that's why you feel so **** (it's undeniable - I felt the same way in the months leading to my diagnosis) and it bodes well that once it is under control, you *will* feel a ton better, and you'll be in a better position to start finding the real things that make us all happy - friends, partners, family, career, hobbies etc.

So, let's go back to basics. Imagine your normal day now. What is so busy about it that you couldn't plan your diet? I suspect you'll realise that time is more abundant than you realise, that you fill it with things that don't make you feel better or better a out yourself.
Do not buy another microwave meal. They are **** and they are full of ****. As a diabetic, they are completely untuned to what your body needs. Go to your kitchen cupboards/fridge-freezer now and take out the following: Any cereals, bread, biscuits, sweets, rice, pasta, potatoes. You'll not need these now.
Look at anything prepared or made in a factory. Look at the nutrition labelling on these. As a rule of thumb, start to get rid of anything that is high in carbs and anything that has more than one or two grammes of sugar. Check sauces - some of them are ridiculously high in sugar. All this stuff is slowly killing you as a diabetic.

Next, go to the supermarket or your local shops. Go yourself, bags in hand to replace what you just removed from your kitchen. Aim to end up with at least 80% in your trolley as single ingredient items - things that grow above ground, that swam in the sea and that lived on land, or anything that an animal produced. If it's in tins, boxes, packets or fresh or frozen, it doesn't matter. Make sure you have herbs and spices, because they're going to make this whole thing nice. Look at what is available on the shelves, read the labels and don't just fall into a habit of buying the same things.

Now, recognise that you are going to cook. Use the Internet; it will tell you how. Phone friends that you haven't spoken to for a while. Tell them you will cook for them. This raises the bar for you, and they'll invariably return the favour. Accept that some of what you make will be rubbish. Life is all about trial and error.

Identify somewhere near to you that is pleasant; a park, a cafe, a river, a high-street...anything within a mile or so. Three days a week, force yourself to walk there, walk around a bit and walk back. Lengthen the walk as you see fit. Don't forget to smile and say hi to other folks; I find getting a response from a stranger gives me a little warm feeling, because you realise that all the other humans out there are nice (on the whole) and that reaffirms your desire to be out and about.

Finally, if friends or family ever offer to help you out, take it. You will both feel better for having done so.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Prem51

Antje77

Oracle
Retired Moderator
Messages
19,284
Type of diabetes
LADA
Treatment type
Insulin
First, a big hug for you. Second, I can only speak from my own experience, but I've been struggling with depression for about one and a half years before my diabetes diagnosis (therapy, different sorts of tablets). After diagnosis and getting my blood sugar in range most of the time, my depression vanished just like that. Maybe paying attention to your diabetes will help more with your depression than actually trying to tackle the depression. Easier said than done, as depression might try to keep you from handling diabetes, and sadly, I've no advice for that.
And cowardice has saved many people from suicide, including myself. Very happy about that!
 
  • Like
Reactions: gazzab

gazzab

Active Member
Messages
31
Type of diabetes
Type 2
First, a big hug for you. Second, I can only speak from my own experience, but I've been struggling with depression for about one and a half years before my diabetes diagnosis (therapy, different sorts of tablets). After diagnosis and getting my blood sugar in range most of the time, my depression vanished just like that. Maybe paying attention to your diabetes will help more with your depression than actually trying to tackle the depression. Easier said than done, as depression might try to keep you from handling diabetes, and sadly, I've no advice for that.
And cowardice has saved many people from suicide, including myself. Very happy about that!
vicious circle i just want to break the cycle but i just can't seem to find it in me to do exactly that
 

Resurgam

Expert
Messages
9,850
Type of diabetes
Type 2 (in remission!)
Treatment type
Diet only
I tend to go out to Lidl as they have the protein rolls - the lowest carb bread I have found - they are handy for me - I can even use my bus pass, but I think that they do home deliveries.
I can only urge you to make a start now - diabetes can be very nasty and once it has got a grip the consequences can be very bad indeed.
 
  • Like
Reactions: gazzab

gazzab

Active Member
Messages
31
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Thank you, everyone, for all the messages I do appreciate them. Your support does help.
while I am posting which part of the forum would be best for poetry and creative writing if any
 

Antje77

Oracle
Retired Moderator
Messages
19,284
Type of diabetes
LADA
Treatment type
Insulin
A lot of great poetry and other art was written by artists with severe depressions. So I hope you'll still be able to write in the near future, when your depression has vanished! Take care.
 

archersuz

Well-Known Member
Messages
1,213
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Hi @gazzab
Have you thought about having an evening walk with your son? My son goes out with me every evening and it's a nice unwinding time for him. If your son is taking his GCSEs this year, maybe he would benefit from having a walk and relax with his Dad. No need to tell him how bad you feel - just that you fancy a walk and would like to spend some time with him. Start with 15-30 minutes then gradually increase. I'm regularly doing an hour a night now and it has helped me mentally and physically.
Suz