Good morning
I am seeking advice from any parents who also struggle with getting there child to take insulin. My daughter is 13 years old and was diagnosed with type 1 two years ago. She has had DKA twice in this time and taken in to hospital another two times due to her ketones being high. Every day is a battle with her to take her insulin. I count her carbs for home and school as she wont do it and will just guess the amount of insulin to take. She refuses to let myself or her dad at weekends watch her take her insulin as she will only do it on her legs and refuses to do it anywhere else and as shes 13 doesnt want to pull her trousers down in front of us to do it. I have tried everything to make it easier for her and have even gone to the measures to ser my alarm and test her during the night when shes asleep. She barely will engage with the diabetic team and wouldn't speak with a psychologist as she doesnt feel she needs this. Due to her recent visit to the hospital she has now a social worker involved but I cant see this making any difference. She tells them what they want to hear at the time and then when they go away the fight to get her to do it begins again. Iv tries trusting her like she has asked but this has been at it's worse as she still doesnt do it properly. I am so concerned for her health and as a mum I feel I am neglecting her but I just dont know what else I can do, it just doesnt seem to bother her at all. Has anyone else experienced this and is there anything more i can do to help her. Iv tried talking and explained to her I am scared she is going to become really unwell and doing it in a way where I am not nagging but again it just does not seem to sink in. She is in denial and thinks nothing will happen even though doctors and family have gone over and over with her the side affects and she been in hospital at the worse stages of DKA. I really dont know what else I can do, I never realised how hard this would be for her or us
Hi
I've had Type 1 Diabetes for 38 years.
I was diagnosed when I was 17 months old so have gone through the teenager ups and downs whilst living with Type 1 Diabetes.
Firstly, as much as Diabetes is a scary thing for the person that has it and the family, you have to remember that at this age there are a lot of things going on that would be going on regardless of whether she has diabetes or not.
Secondly, because this is quite new to her she is just doing the normal rebellious things teenagers do but also because she probably feels different now to the rest of her family/friends she is probably finding it quite difficult to figure this out in her head on top of the other normal confusing things that happen to a teenager at this age.
I remember when I was 5 I did my own injection and I got a present from a lady at my dad's work because of how big a thing it was at that age as my dad was clearly very proud of what I had done, however I stopped doing them again until I was 13.
What made me start doing them again was there was a school trip where we were going abroad and none of the teachers or welfare staff were allowed to do my injections so it was literally a case of step up or miss out on the trip which I really didn't want to do.
At the time I was using a syringe needles as pens had not long come out however after discussing with the hospital they changed me over to the pens to make it easier to do, which it did.
The one thing I found which I know other insulin dependant diabetics have felt at some point is that having anyone watch you do your insulin can be a very daunting experience for anyone, especially a teenager. I used to go into another room or if I was out I would nip into the loo away from people because even though Diabetes is now very common, the attitudes of others unfortunately hasn't changed meaning friends from school might make a nasty comment simply because they don't understand, even being really horrible and saying she is a druggy which no one wants to hear.
As for doing her injections in front of you I really don't think you should be asking to watch her because having the condition is making her feel uncomfortable enough which being like a "freak show" so to speak that will make her dig her heels in even more in my opinion. Maybe ask her why she won't do her injections and ask her if there is anything you can do to assist her, and if that means doing it for her then so be it, eventually she'll get sick of mum or dad doing it for her so will end up doing it herself to stop the embarrassment it causes.
I was told to see a psychologist a couple of times simply because I cried about my condition in front of the doctor at one of my appointments because it is something I felt at the time they were not listening to what I wanted or how I felt, they were repeating all the complications the dangers the everything and what got my goat at 14 was when my consultant said I was overweight which in all honesty was just puppy fat and because of this I stopped having appointments. I was 17 when I restarted attending my appointments simply because I wanted a driving licence but due to my DKA's at 16 the DVLA wouldn't allow me to have a licence.
I messed around a lot at that time not testing etc but to my cost delaying something which I could've got much more quickly but at the same time it didn't kill me.
I had my son 14 years ago which was very touch and go as to if he would survive because my diabetes wasn't brilliant throughout the pregnancy as I was put on the basal bolus regime to help but it did the exact opposite, which sounds like your daughter is on. There are alternatives you just have to not be afraid to shout loud enough.
Find out if this is part of the issue. Again listen to her don't tell her all the bad stuff before you've established what her reasons are otherwise it is just pointless. Have you enquired about the pump or the Freestlye Libre as both have totally changed my life even this late on.
Please try not to pressure her or tell her how you are feeling all the time. Listen to what she feels and what she wants and then compromise so you are both ok but remember this is about her, your worries and feelings can be addressed once she is on board.
I've been where your daughter is doing the things your daughter does so maybe she would like to get in touch or maybe you would. You are doing a great job and you are no way neglecting her. It's one of those things that unfortunately will require a lot of compromise on both your parts.
Feel free to send me a PM if you wish to chat further as I could probably give a few more pointers having done this but learnt from it and come out of it the other side. Good luck
(edited by mod)