I have been trying to get my HBA1c lower for YEARS to try for a baby.
When real life kicks in the theory behind diabetes control just goes out of the window.
However, I got an insulin pump and managed to reduce my HBA 1c from 9.3% to 6.4% in a year, for me this was amazing. It was a lot of hard work but these are some of the things that I did that may help you:
Weekly contact with my nurse, emailing my readings and getting advice on where to make adjustments
Stuck to no more than 50g carbs per meal (tried low carbing but was advised that when pregnant would need carbs)
Did DAFNE course
Posted lots of questions to forums to get advice on things
They are just a few things, it was not easy but I did notice that after about a month of constant monitoring, weighing and adjusting things seemed to settle and it became easier and almost routine.
Remember that targets set are for "most of the time" not all of the time, we are not robots and we can never get things absolutely perfect.
I got pregnant but very sadly miscarried which was a shock after working so hard on my diabetes, I was so caught up in my control that it never entered my head that things could go wrong anyway without being connected to my diabetes. Since my miscarriage I have gone onto autopilot and lost control again, my last HBA1c was 7.4% but I am trying hard now to tighten that and also to conceive again.
The emotional side is equally as hard and I would suggest talking your frustrations over with other ladies in the same position as you can be left feeling very alone.
It is hard work but it can be done and if I can do it I am certain that you can!
Don't give up!