My daughter was diagnosed when she was 9 and had her 8th 'diabetes birthday' last week.
I did nothing but cry to begin with - and even now cannot talk about those first days without getting upset. That never goes away really.
The thing that scared me most initially was the thought that our lives had to become regimented and that we'd never be able to do anything again impulsively. That's not been the case but you do of course always have to have diabetes in the back if your mind.
On one level I would almost like to say "it's not that bad"... but of course it is - but it may not be quite as bad as you're currently imagining and certainly not all the time. My daughter has never not done anything because if her diabetes - you just need to plan a bit more and ensure that the people around her know what they need to do in case if a hypo.
You never stop worrying and every passing year brings a new challenge - ours are currently alcohol (fortunately she is being extremely sensible), driving and then next year it will be university... try to take it day by day though and try not to worry about it all at once.
Try to find other parents in your area to meet up with and compare experiences. Diabetes is the perfect condition for a support group as its the same for everyone - no-one has it 'better or worse' than anyone else and you'll all be telling the same stories. If there isn't one in your area ask your diabetes specialist nurse if she can put you in touch with other parents who may be willing to share their experiences. When my daughter was diagnosed there was a very active group and I met them at a local play centre after about two weeks. I was first bowled over by how happy they were ... I guess I expected them all to feel how I was feeling... and they even joked about diabetes! I can't begin to tell you how much better I felt after that afternoon. I got lots of benefit in terms if diabetes knowledge but realising that life could still be normal was the most invaluable thing.
There's no getting away from the fact that 3 is a horrible age for diagnosis. 9, if there could be a good age, may be it - my daughter could explain what she needed and could be persuaded to eat when necessary and once the first couple of days were over took it in her stride - it's going to be harder with a younger child so a support network will really help you. Try to train other people to give injections (childminders, grandparents) and to understand the main issues so that you have flexibility - if not straight away then once you're feeling more in control yourself.
Just to say reading wise - "Type 1 Diabetes in Children, Adolescents and Young Adults" has been an invaluable book - initially I tried to read it cover to cover (it's about 2 cm thick!) but now use it periodically just for information on particular things. It has clear explanations, doesn't pull any punches but does give you everything you'd ever need to know. Another good forum is
www.diabetesdaily.com. It's run by a someone with diabetes in the US so a lot of the contributors are US based also but it's very active and you always get lots of really informative answers if you post a request for advice on any topic.
I wasn't going to write an essay - but have totally failed! Like most parents I could talk all day about diabetes.
Very best wishes for Tuesday - what a lot to have on your plate all in one go.
And finally 'be kind to yourself' - I usually hate that phrase but it is fitting in this instance. Don't try to learn it all at once and allow yourself space to feel this way - it will make adapting to it all easier in the long run.
Sue
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