Problem with friend over my diabetes

[mo1905]

Good point Dave lol !


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[GraceK]

The bride is indeed supposed to get everything she wants, it's supposedly more her wedding, than even the groom!

Of course it is. Weddings are for women. The men are just there to make up the numbers.

Someone should tell these Bridezillas when enough is enough. Sorry, but I don't think being a bride has anything to do with getting all your own way either on the day or forever after. Some people these days have a very cockeyed view of what being a bride and marriage amounts to. Perhaps that's why so many of them don't get much further than a foot past the starting post. :think:

 

[Yorksman]

Just my attempt to inject a little humour into the thread Grace. I have stated that I think the bride is throwing a hissy fit over nothing. Heaven forbid the groom should forbid his future mother in law to attend the service

 

[izzzi]

Just my attempt to inject a little humour into the thread Grace. I have stated that I think the bride is throwing a hissy fit over nothing. Heaven forbid the groom should forbid his future mother in law to attend the service

That was brilliant :lol: Humour is a great medicine.

Roy,

 

[GraceK]

Just my attempt to inject a little humour into the thread Grace. I have stated that I think the bride is throwing a hissy fit over nothing. Heaven forbid the groom should forbid his future mother in law to attend the service

I know Yorksman, I got the humour. I'd love some of today's downtrodden grooms to just not turn up, run off with the bridesmaid and leave these Bridezillas to ponder on the real meaning of life! :lol:

 

[DaveNN]

Just my attempt to inject a little humour into the thread Grace. I have stated that I think the bride is throwing a hissy fit over nothing. Heaven forbid the groom should forbid his future mother in law to attend the service

That was brilliant :lol: Humour is a great medicine.

Roy,

As good as metformin?


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[iantheb]

Re: Ignorance of non-diabetics

As a result of me standing up for myself, my 'friend' is now implying she doesn't want me to be a bridesmaid.

Sounds to me like your 'friend' is suffering more than just a bout of ignorance. Did she throw herself on the floor, beat her fists and kick her feet against the ground and wail, 'it's not fair'? Pity her future husband.

She's a baby and obviously does not have the foggiest idea of what having a mature approach is. You do. Is she really trying emotional blackmail to the level of putting your health at risk because of her own little dreams of a fairy tale wedding? Your suggestion of going sightseeing is spot on. What does it matter to her if you are absent for a short while. You have every reason to feel disappointed but it's your friend you should be disappointed in, not yourself. She's just immature.

sorry but to me she is no friend

 

[GraceK]

This thread reminds me of why I prefer to remain single, anti-social and friendless :lol:

 

[titchy_lou]

Had a very long chat tonight with bridezilla...gave an hour long lecture on the importance of not screwing around with your body, especially diabetes. Also, I've made it clear that I won't be going to the chocolate factory, because it'll make me feel terrible. She did say she would think about doing something else instead, but I reiterated the importance of not changing plans just because of me.

As of the present, I am still her bridesmaid and we don't hate each other.


Diabetes type 1.5
Diagnosed September 2011
Currently on basal insulin

 

[GraceK]

Had a very long chat tonight with bridezilla...gave an hour long lecture on the importance of not screwing around with your body, especially diabetes. Also, I've made it clear that I won't be going to the chocolate factory, because it'll make me feel terrible. She did say she would think about doing something else instead, but I reiterated the importance of not changing plans just because of me.

As of the present, I am still her bridesmaid and we don't hate each other.


Diabetes type 1.5
Diagnosed September 2011
Currently on basal insulin

Well good for you! I don't think she should change her chocolate plans for you either. That would make you feel even worse. I'm glad you're still her bridesmaid and that you don't hate each other. Well done you!!! May you enjoy a long, happy and HONEST friendship.

I have a really good friend who I don't see very often at all. But I know I can call on her any time and vice versa. She once invited me on a hen party to ... EGYPT ... of all places. Considering I can't bear hot weather, large groups of cackling women, or drunkenness I said "Come on Clare, you know I'd absolutely a hate a 16 day cruise with 20 women down the b****y Nile, so why are you even asking me?"

She said "I just wanted to know you were invited and also to see if you'd STILL remain as true to your b****y self as ALWAYS and say NO as usual!"

See? She knew exactly what I'd say and she was actually hoping I'd say it. We are soooooooooooo different. She loves crowds and girlie nights out, or at least she USED to. That's my worst nightmare - a gang of women getting drunk together and cackling about each other behind their backs which they inevitable end up doing. And I can't abide that.

The strange thing was ... after the Nile cruise she came back and confided in me "Never again ... never again will I go on holiday with a group of women. I was stuck on a boat in the heat with a gang of pre-menstrual women all getting drunk, running into each others cabins and b******g about each other. I just wanted to sleep and wake up back in my own bed."

I think I came into her life to show her how to be her own best friend. Before that I think she considered me to be a bit of a bore. But now she seems to be enjoying solitude and aloneness and seeing that it's vastly different to loneliness.

 

[izzzi]

Hi, Titchy_lou

Good ending, wishing it all goes well for the wedding,

Grace has got it right regarding true and honest friend

Roy.

 

[Robinredbreast]

Had a very long chat tonight with bridezilla...gave an hour long lecture on the importance of not screwing around with your body, especially diabetes. Also, I've made it clear that I won't be going to the chocolate factory, because it'll make me feel terrible. She did say she would think about doing something else instead, but I reiterated the importance of not changing plans just because of me.

As of the present, I am still her bridesmaid and we don't hate each other.


Diabetes type 1.5
Diagnosed September 2011
Currently on basal insulin

Well done titchy_lou, I am so pleased for you both. Just goes to show what a little bit of maturity and (alot of common sense) can do) :clap:

All the best RRB

 

[Madmathematician]

I think that everyone's getting wound up about this. I'm type 2 and decided, when newly diagnosed, to try to control my diabetes purely with diet. However, I was also a chocoholic and that meant not going near it, not getting even the smell of it until I had got used to not eating or even wanting to eat it. It took about a year I think but I'm ok now. The point is that if you love and crave the stuff but are trying very hard to stay off it then you need to stay away - completely! A good friend, even one stressed about her wedding, should understand that - surely?

 

[Nomibutton]

I know this isn't going to down well on here but I don't think as her bridesmaid it was the time to make such a big deal of this small issue. Your friend obviously thinks very highly of you in the fact that you are her bridesmaid. Im guessing she was a little upset that you were complaining about the chocolate making which she will be looking forward to doing with all her friends. She maybe felt that you were accusing her of not thinking of you before booking. It is her hen party and meant to be a day all about her. I know being diabetic sucks sometimes and you have the right to not attend but for one day it might have been worth biting your tongue and just getting on with it/ working round it/ just not eating the chocolate! I also do not feel it is fair to judge her so harsh on her comment about just taking more insulin. That is what most diabetics do when they are on multiple injections or a pump. In my experience there are ways round having a one off chocolate indulgence without any health concerns. I think your post sounded very angry and when I read it I got the feeling you were annoyed that your condition wasn't top of her concern on that day.

I think it is a shame to allow this to spoil a friendship. Diabetes causes enough problems without letting it ruin a friendship too!

 

[ShelleyHarris1981]

Im recently diagnosed Type 1, excuse my ignorance but would a teeny bit of chocolate be all that bad??? Im actually freaking out a little here as had a small piece of chocolate over weekend for Easter and now feel I have somehow stupidly endangered my health? I tested before and after and was 5.6 after. Surely going to the event would be fun? Isnt life for living even with this hanging over our heads? I dont mean living crazily but going and still enjoying life. Wouldnt it be fun to be with friends even if you cant gorge on chocolate? We are only here once after all x

 

[mo1905]

Shelley, nothing wrong with the occasional treat, chocolate, wine etc ! You still have to enjoy life ! Some will shy away but I think the majority are like you and you shouldn't feel bad for doing so !


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[Maryannonsilk]

Hi there ...I like Sid Bonkers reply ....I would give my friend a hug and say ... ' hey you, I really want to be around to help celebrate your silver wedding anniversary ...' xxx

 

[GraceK]

With regards to eating chocolate and visiting chocolate factories for whatever reason, I think it entirely depends on where you're at with your diabetes at the time. If you're new to it, or struggling with your numbers and feel that one whiff of chocolate will lead to a whole bar, then it's entirely up to you. We've all had to learn how to limit our intake of certain foods and some find it easier than others. First couple of months of diabetes I'd have been tempted by chocolate, but now I've got a take it or leave it attitude and I think all a visit to a chocolate factory would do for me would be to make me feel nauseous!

But if I was still tempted by it, I'd stay clear. Some people, once they've succumbed to temptation, find it hard to stop.

No-one would dream of putting cigarettes in the path of a would be non smoker would they?

 

[leking]

If this was me, I would have gone and enjoyed all the chocolate. Tested a few times more and adjusted my insuli9n accordingly. Maybe I'd go a bit higher than normal (actually, I'd probably end up being a bit lower knowing me), but... thats just what I'd do.. :/

 

[GraceK]

Well it looks like the bride and bridesmaid have reached an agreement so perhaps it's time we all butted out now. Hope the Bride and Groom have a lovely day and the Bridesmaid cops off with the Best Man! :wink: