Hi, night times are so lonely

1103andrewb

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Messages
21
Type of diabetes
Type 2
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Insulin
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being single after losing my wife to cancer last year xxx
I lost my wife due to cancer last July, blood sugars were hard to control, but I think I got it sorted.
 

maplelime

Member
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9
Type of diabetes
Type 2
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Tablets (oral)
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Winter in Alberta
Sorry for your loss. The best advice I was given was to use 'the doctors diet' . My sugars are pretty much where they should be daily and I have lost 18 LB's to date. Its tough but well worth the results. I hope you do your wife proud and look after yourself.
Regards
 
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Andy12345

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Hi, Im So Sorry :( my mum lost my dad a few years ago and ive seen how hard it is, theres nothing i can say to help, ive always found that when we are in our darkest place we are in the place we can shine our brightest, i wished i had something useful, its a amazing thing getting your bloods under control under these circumstances, i know if she looking down shes very proud, try to look for the small pleasures where you can find them, keep your chin up

maybe you could let us know how you gained control, helping others with your experience may be a little comfort

((man hug))
 
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1103andrewb

Member
Messages
21
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Insulin
Dislikes
being single after losing my wife to cancer last year xxx
I thought everything was ok, I knew I was type 2 and was on metformin. never bothered to test as I said, I thought everything was ok. Decided one day to test my bloods and my meter just read 'HI' scared me a little after doing a google. I am now on insulin, but I am sure the stress and depression contributed to this. SO LONELY, AND ALONE.
 
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maplelime

Member
Messages
9
Type of diabetes
Type 2
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Tablets (oral)
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Winter in Alberta
I thought everything was ok, I knew I was type 2 and was on metformin. never bothered to test as I said, I thought everything was ok. Decided one day to test my bloods and my meter just read 'HI' scared me a little after doing a google. I am now on insulin, but I am sure the stress and depression contributed to this. SO LONELY, AND ALONE.
Stress will raise your levels unfortunately, maybe learn to meditate, it really does help with the stress. As far as being lonely, I hear you, not being around people isn't a good thing all the time. Its best if you can join a group of some kind, not sure of your age, but there are many types depending on your interests. You are, 'thankfully' still here and life can be rewarding for you again.
 
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Andy12345

Expert
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you just need to find a way to move through this, maybe look for a distraction, an interest, have you tried speaking to grief councillor? the number for cruse is 0844 477 9400 they can help you, what your feeling is normal


Sent from the Diabetes Forum App
 

Scandichic

Well-Known Member
Messages
3,708
Type of diabetes
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Michael Gove and his insane educational? policies!
And you can post on here if course! This is the perfect place to talk about everything!!!!!!!! I have posted loads on here and opened loads of threads. Posting early evening is always good coz if you leave it 10 mins someone will invariably reply! Although there are some night owls amongst us and on occasions I have been known to go on the old ipad when I've woken up and can't sleep - usually due to my year 11 and their complete lack of concern about their grades - it's only French and I'm not taking it at college. Sadly their parents are of the same shocking attitude! Sometimes if I'm feeling down, I look for the jokes thread - thomothebear opened a virtual pub which was so daft it always lifted my mood. Sometimes, other people are going through the mill and I feel better coz I can hopefully contribute something useful. There's a lovely atmosphere here so visit us more often! X
 
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Beshlie

Well-Known Member
Messages
277
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Tablets (oral)
Welcome Andrew. I'm so sorry to hear about your wife and it's normal you should feel lonely and alone while you go through the stages of grieving. I presume your avatar photo is of your little dog? If so he or she will play their part in healing you, they know when something is wrong, often before we do. I have 2 cavalier king charles spaniels who are playing their bit in helping me to get out of the house again after months of not being able to. It's not like going for a walk on your own and often you find yourself chatting to someone which makes us feel a little better.
Be kind to yourself.x
 

shellysexbomb

Well-Known Member
Messages
134
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Diet only
[[Hugs]] Try and stay strong and do all the living that your Missis can't :(
 

1103andrewb

Member
Messages
21
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Insulin
Dislikes
being single after losing my wife to cancer last year xxx
Welcome Andrew. I'm so sorry to hear about your wife and it's normal you should feel lonely and alone while you go through the stages of grieving. I presume your avatar photo is of your little dog? If so he or she will play their part in healing you, they know when something is wrong, often before we do. I have 2 cavalier king charles spaniels who are playing their bit in helping me to get out of the house again after months of not being able to. It's not like going for a walk on your own and often you find yourself chatting to someone which makes us feel a little better.
Be kind to yourself.x
Hi, the picture is of our dog Honey(but we usually called her Bunny) for no real reason. Bunny would sit on my wifes knee all the time, a real ladies dog. Sadly she got a tumor on her spine and no longer had feeling in her front legs and could not walk anymore. I had to have put to sleep last Monday. Second worst time of my life, first was holding my wifes hand when she died. cavalier king charles spaniels were my wifes favourite dog.
 

Janiept

Expert
Messages
5,311
Oh Andrew. I am so sorry to hear that you lost your dog as well as your beloved wife.
There are no words that anybody can say to lessen your grief but please know that we care and that if you need to unload some of that pain then we are here to listen.
Caring thoughts coming to you over the ether x
 
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donnellysdogs

Master
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13,233
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Pump
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People that can't listen to other people's opinions.
People that can't say sorry.
Andrew
Welcome, you are never alone here!! At home in real life its a little of occupying your mind to keep busy... Even in a crowd of people you can still feel alone.
Tome does heal, some quickly, some slowly... But do carry on and keep looking after yourself.


Sent from the Diabetes Forum App
 
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scarper

Active Member
Messages
29
Type of diabetes
Prediabetes
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Diet only
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know-it-all's
To live in the hearts of those you love is not to die.
 
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K

Kat100

Guest
Hello, so sorry for the loss of your wife, life is so short, and your little dog that was sad...
When you feel the time is right for you, start to do things for you which you enjoy, no mater how small...
If you don't feel like being with to many people just yet, the internet is great for a chat, like being here for example , a great start......
I do think you might like to think about talking to someone though, sorry if you already have , it's good to talk and cry and laugh when the time is right....stay strong and look after yourself .....start to work on being less lonely .....set small goals to make you feel a little better?.
Tc and it's great chatting to you ....Kat
 
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K

Kat100

Guest
Hi ....me again , just seen that you walk a lot that is great, do you have any walking groups you could join,also so many dog walkers needed in animal charities if you have any near you.....only when the time is right though....Kat x
 

Scandichic

Well-Known Member
Messages
3,708
Type of diabetes
Type 2
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Tablets (oral)
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Michael Gove and his insane educational? policies!
Hi again! Just wondering if you have children? I notice you are retired at the moment. Hope it's not too insensitive to ask but do you think that you might get another dog? I know everyone's different. I went to give my old cats things away to the animal charity but then they showed me pictures of all the cats which needed rehoming. I went to get Bart and found he was in with Homer. I ended up coming away with both as I couldn't leave homer behind. She'd had 3 homes in as many weeks. I won't tell you what my husband said when I turned up with both! Lol! We've had them over 12 years and my girls love them as much as I do. The husband still remains unimpressed! :)
 
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Beshlie

Well-Known Member
Messages
277
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Tablets (oral)
Hi, the picture is of our dog Honey(but we usually called her Bunny) for no real reason. Bunny would sit on my wifes knee all the time, a real ladies dog. Sadly she got a tumor on her spine and no longer had feeling in her front legs and could not walk anymore. I had to have put to sleep last Monday. Second worst time of my life, first was holding my wifes hand when she died. cavalier king charles spaniels were my wifes favourite dog.

That is so sad to hear about Bunny, bless her, but Andrew you really did do the kindest thing for her. Maybe when the time is right for you, you will choose to have another little companion to share your life and have fun with. You are going through a lot of stress but, don't forget to think about yourself and keeping yourself as healthy as possible. Life is just so unfair at times, but it is also very precious.
 
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1103andrewb

Member
Messages
21
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Insulin
Dislikes
being single after losing my wife to cancer last year xxx
Things didn't work out as they should have, I made plans to make sure my wife was going to be ok. I had my first heart attack when I was just 42. It was supposed to be that I died first. Then things reversed, she was diagnosed with cancer and only lived for a further 4 months. My diabetes then went bonkers. I have now got it under control thanks to my medical team. miss her so much. and bunny xx
 

Janiept

Expert
Messages
5,311
First you lost your darling wife and now Bunny. So much grief and loss in such a short time.
People who are not animal lovers often don't understand the grief that comes when you lose a pet, but I know that the distress is like losing a member of your family. The pain just as deep and of course it's so new and all coming while you are trying to come to terms with the loss of your wife. Hang on in there Andrew. x
 
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Beshlie

Well-Known Member
Messages
277
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Tablets (oral)
Life is something we can never plan, we just have to find the strength to deal with what it throws at us, whether it be losing loved ones or discovering we have diabetes, which also can involve a period of grieving. But positive things do happen too, often when we least expect them to. I still miss my dad terribly, who died in 1974, but the positive things he left me are priceless, the fun we had, fond and often funny memories, the things he taught me, those things are with me for life. Being an only child dogs were my main companions and they too each left me with fond memories, and I have painted some of their portraits and brought out their characters.
You have done well, Andrew, to get your diabetes back on track. You really do have to think of your own needs now.
Take care.