Oh dear, this was unexpected

[Heathenlass]

Thing is, there are many different kinds of love. I am very happy I am not a school girl but it hurts anyway.

(((((Hugs)))))

Signy

 

[Totto]

I miss him. I miss his bizarre humour and his intelligence, never had to repeat an instruction, contrary to current wwoofers. I miss him in the kitchen working neatly and accurately. I miss our walks in the evenings. I miss him all the time. I miss everything about him including his arms around me, But mostly I just miss having him around. I miss laughing at his silly jokes.

 

[Heathenlass]

It will pass Totto . I know it's not much comfort right now . But I do feel for you.

Did you agree to keep in touch at all ?

Signy

 

[Totto]

Last night we had a bit of a pub crawl with a meal included. Or rather, we walked through Stockholm, my part of Stockholm, and sat down now and then for a beer and talked and talked and laughed and said silly things and were serious and walked a bit further.

Today we went out to an island and just were the there, not doing much, but together. Tonight we cooked a meal together at my brothers place, where we are staying. We have tomorrow left then Im taking him to the air port in the early hours of Sunday morning.

His girlfriend is jealous while hubby isnt. We talked a bit about that last night. About us, his girlfriend, my husband and marriage, changes I will try to make in my life and stuff and about him, of course, and his life with the girlfriend.

I really do love hubby, but I think I love my young friend too. Not sure in what way, there are many aspects of love, but it is love. He loves me too. I am not saying love as in being in love, although that probably is a part of this love. It is a mess and it is lovely. I will be devastated again on Sunday but until then I will only be happy.

 

[Scandichic]

Hej på dej! Jag undrade hur du mådde! Du kommer att ha många vackra påminnelse! Njuta av dem! Stor kram! Scandixx

 

[Montana]

Would anyone care to translate this into English please x

 

[jack412]

my sweed accent isn't that good but... I vunder who ya were going. ya have vooderful memories to keep ya warm

 

[Heathenlass]

Would anyone care to translate this into English please x

Nothing too controversial

Something like :
" Hello, I wondered how you were feeling . You will have many beautiful memories, enjoy them ! Big hug."

Signy

 

[WeeWillie]

Last night we had a bit of a pub crawl with a meal included. Or rather, we walked through Stockholm, my part of Stockholm, and sat down now and then for a beer and talked and talked and laughed and said silly things and were serious and walked a bit further.

Today we went out to an island and just were the there, not doing much, but together. Tonight we cooked a meal together at my brothers place, where we are staying. We have tomorrow left then Im taking him to the air port in the early hours of Sunday morning.

His girlfriend is jealous while hubby isnt. We talked a bit about that last night. About us, his girlfriend, my husband and marriage, changes I will try to make in my life and stuff and about him, of course, and his life with the girlfriend.

I really do love hubby, but I think I love my young friend too. Not sure in what way, there are many aspects of love, but it is love. He loves me too. I am not saying love as in being in love, although that probably is a part of this love. It is a mess and it is lovely. I will be devastated again on Sunday but until then I will only be happy.

Hiya Totto.

Do you, deep down, think it a positive action, knowing your attraction/feelings towards this young man, to
continue meeting together while taking into account the possibility of a distressful ending of the relationship?
Are you absolutely certain you're not prolonging any future angst for yourself, or indeed, the young man.

It's a tough call being brutally honest with one’s self at times.

I wish you all the very best in restoring peace and calm back into your mind once again.





Regards.
willie

 

[Pollylocks]

Its always stressful Totto, a relationship ridden with angst as this one must be.....you say your husband's not jealous so perhaps he has no idea of your feelings for this friend of yours or maybe he's just riding the storm......I really hope things work out for you and wish you well.

 

[pavlosn]

Wow things have really got more interesting in the few months I have been away from this forum.

This does read like there is a movie script in here somewhere.

More seriously, Totto the reason I found this thread so fascinating was because of your bravery in being so honest and open about your feelings but also because of the ambiguity of the situation you describe.

I found myself fluctuating between sympathizing with you and wanting to tell you to snap out of it as, without judging in any way, I think you have allowed yourself to play with fire emotionally and only hope that you do not end up too badly burned as a result.

I believe you probably realize that the real issue you have to now face is your relationship with your husband and the unhappiness you feel about some aspects of it. I just wonder whether your feelings for this young man will not now color this relationship.

Is your husband really so unaware and unconcerned about your friendship and feelings about the young man?

In your last post you state that unlike the young man's girlfriend, your husband is not jealous of the two of you. How do you know? Did you discuss this with him?

Anyway, I hope things do end well for you one way or another. Particularly, I hope that you are able to talk things over and work things out with the husband you obviously still care for and are able to file this whole "affair" with the young man as a bittersweet memory.

I do love a happy ending!

All the best

Pavlos

 

[Totto]

Hiya Totto.

Do you, deep down, think it a positive action, knowing your attraction/feelings towards this young man, to
continue meeting together while taking into account the possibility of a distressful ending of the relationship?
Are you absolutely certain you're not prolonging any future angst for yourself, or indeed, the young man.

It's a tough call being brutally honest with one’s self at times.

I wish you all the very best in restoring peace and calm back into your mind once again.





Regards.
willie

Thank you. God knows when we will see each other again as I took him to the air port this morning and he will be landing in Paris in half an hour.

 

[Totto]

Its always stressful Totto, a relationship ridden with angst as this one must be.....you say your husband's not jealous so perhaps he has no idea of your feelings for this friend of yours or maybe he's just riding the storm......I really hope things work out for you and wish you well.

Nope, no angst really, mostly happiness. And you are probably right in that hubby doesn't see how very much I like my young friend. But I have complained continuously since he left us in August of missing him so haven't been quiet on the subject either and it is no secret I have spent the last days with him.

 

[Scandichic]

Nope, no angst really, mostly happiness. And you are probably right in that hubby doesn't see how very much I like my young friend. But I have complained continuously since he left us in August of missing him so haven't been quiet on the subject either and it is no secret I have spent the last days with him.

So what happens now?
Stor kram!

 

[Totto]

Now this part is over. He is young and confident we will keep in touch and see each other soon again. I have an invitation to France, of course. Which I won´t have the time or money to accept any time soon and he feels it is wise to calm his girl friend down a bit first anyway. I am not as confident.

This was a strange and unexpected relationship to happen, us meeting and liking each other so much, across the borders of generations, language, nations and convention. Now we will get on with our lives, I with hubby and the farm, he with his girlfriend and his studies but we will skype and write and probably see each other at some point in the future. He is working on learning Swedish while I have decided not to learn French until I have brushed up my German into a usable condition.

All in all, I miss him but feel good about it.

 

[Scandichic]

Now this part is over. He is young and confident we will keep in touch and see each other soon again. I have an invitation to France, of course. Which I won´t have the time or money to accept any time soon and he feels it is wise to calm his girl friend down a bit first anyway. I am not as confident.

This was a strange and unexpected relationship to happen, us meeting and liking each other so much, across the borders of generations, language, nations and convention. Now we will get on with our lives, I with hubby and the farm, he with his girlfriend and his studies but we will skype and write and probably see each other at some point in the future. He is working on learning Swedish while I have decided not to learn French until I have brushed up my German into a usable condition.

All in all, I miss him but feel good about it.

Sometimes these things happen. It was a shame you didn't meet when you were both not involved with others as you sound like soul mates. What is he studying? I can't remember if you've mentioned it or if I have forgotten. I need to brush up my German too. I haven't taught any German for at least a year so it's rusty. If you need any help let me know! Hubbie was out last night - playing poker with brother and friends and kids in bed so I watched Män som hatar kvinnor and inte flera mord. Bliss as no interruptions! Not so bliss when he came in at 3am drunk (drinks very little so when he does sink a few beers he's somewhat the worse for wear.)

 

[Totto]

Seems I will have to start learning French anyway, as I just got an email in that language!

 

[Totto]

Sometimes these things happen. It was a shame you didn't meet when you were both not involved with others as you sound like soul mates. What is he studying? I can't remember if you've mentioned it or if I have forgotten. I need to brush up my German too. I haven't taught any German for at least a year so it's rusty. If you need any help let me know! Hubbie was out last night - playing poker with brother and friends and kids in bed so I watched Män som hatar kvinnor and inte flera mord. Bliss as no interruptions! Not so bliss when he came in at 3am drunk (drinks very little so when he does sink a few beers he's somewhat the worse for wear.)

Engineering. And our main problem isn't really our involvement in other relationship but the age difference. I have been with hubby since my young friend was in primary school. I was already established in my career and several years out of uni living in my own house when he was born!
Two films in a row, well done!

 

[Scandichic]

Seems I will have to start learning French anyway, as I just got an email in that language!

Can help with that too! Do you have any French?

 

[Scandichic]

Engineering. And our main problem isn't really our involvement in other relationship but the age difference. I have been with hubby since my young friend was in primary school. I was already established in my career and several years out of uni living in my own house when he was born!
Two films in a row, well done!

Does this mean that your relationship with hubbie is over? If the age difference not the fact that you both have partners is the issue? Or are the 2 of you going to remain just good friends? Will his girlfriend be accepting of your friendship? If it was a friendship then why is she jealous? Just wondering?