Will my son ever start to take type 1 serious?

Alba37

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Hi, Sorry to hear about your son's diagnosis :( It's still such early days for you both but everything you are experiencing is 'normal' and not uncommon. My son was 13 when he was diagnosed. I now know many parents with teens with diabetes. There are lots of adjustments to make to his new life, diabetes is complex and it takes a long time to learn. Take things a day at a time and try not to worry about him not doing everything he should. I'd just keep supporting him and hopefully if he has a supportive clinic too it will stand him in good stead for the future. Wishing you all the best.
 

Spencer67

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Don't be too hard on him and do take that step back you'll only create stress for yourselves and the whole family, he has to find his own path and creating tension out of your own necessity to control (because you care) will cause trouble. Gently educate, that's your role. It may get bad when he has hypo's and he becomes irrationally ill tempered for absolutely no reason, your gonna have to learn how to cope and learn not to react, understand how stress will affect your day to day living. Try to create a sense of calm in the house. Never, not once, ever, give him a clip round the ear. Diet is a major problem that divides households, eat what he has to eat, share his burden.
 
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CarbsRok

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That's what the dietitian said, it digests better and if given with a meal and insulin allowed for it then it's better then it being a random snack.
All he has to do is carb count the snack inject for it and eat it.
Please retire the dietician to the local museum. No wonder he is upset and frustrated.
 
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He should be admonished for stealing his sister's things though. Regardless of what it was, going into her space and nicking her stuff needs to be reprimanded. If he was stealing her make up the point would be made.

The discussion should obviously not touch on chocolate and should be totally about trespass into her room and theft of her stuff.

Have to agree there. How would Ryan feel if his sister or another member was rifling through his room, not good whatever he or she was looking for. Hopefully today will be a better day all round and it's still early days yet, regarding diabetes, so in time he should prick his ears up and get it together. Take care and enjoy the rest of the school half term ( even though it;s wet and windy here !! )

Best wishes RRB
 

donnellysdogs

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Have to agree there. How would Ryan feel if his sister or another member was rifling through his room, not good whatever he or she was looking for. Hopefully today will be a better day all round and it's still early days yet, regarding diabetes, so in time he should prick his ears up and get it together. Take care and enjoy the rest of the school half term ( even though it;s wet and windy here !! )

Best wishes RRB

I think the fact that the sister felt she had to hide chocolate in her room is at the actual root of the problem....

It is making the son feel different....I would have done the same thing as the son if anybody did the same to me. The mere fact that he didn't eat it shows that he is crying out not to be treated differently.
Even if he did eat it so long as he still did the injection so what?

He is being made to feel different, only allowing a choc bar after a meal? That's not reasonable for a child.
 
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I think the fact that the sister felt she had to hide chocolate in her room is at the actual root of the problem....

It is making the son feel different....I would have done the same thing as the son if anybody did the same to me. The mere fact that he didn't eat it shows that he is crying out not to be treated differently.
Even if he did eat it so long as he still did the injection so what?

He is being made to feel different, only allowing a choc bar after a meal? That's not reasonable for a child.

Well I'm not his parent, I think RyansMum is obviously and rightly concerned because of his recent diagnosis, so she is a 'newbie' as well. Probably household is walking on egg shells at the moment, but in time that should pass and hopefully calm and every day life will be restored back to normality.:) It's a learning curve for all immediate family members, school mates and close family friends.

RBB :)
 
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donnellysdogs

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Totally agree RRB..

I know from me being diagnosed when 20 that when my mum went to my flat and took out the majority of my then food that I came home and really felt so different to everyone else around me... Then although not living at home the only thing I got for years was "whats your reading", "when due to see hospital?" "You're nit allowed that", have you tested, whats the result"...Etc.
Nobody asked about me first. It was always my diabetes.

Infact it was only a couple of years ago that I gained the courage to tell my mum that I am not her diabetic daughter... I'm her daughter....

Life is about being included, not excluded due to an illness that the person has. Son first.. Daughter first.... Without diabetes being the first subject...and that applies to all family and all friends too.

Early days for all the family and they are tough...

A counsellor a couple years ago told me how the impact of my parents actions and my diabetes diagnosis affected my thoughts thereafter. As I was actually never asked about first, it shaped my thoughts to only being 2nd best....I was 20 and nit even living at home.... But it impacted on me the fact that family and friends in those days saw the diabetes first before they saw me...
 
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Totally agree RRB..

I know from me being diagnosed when 20 that when my mum went to my flat and took out the majority of my then food that I came home and really felt so different to everyone else around me... Then although not living at home the only thing I got for years was "whats your reading", "when due to see hospital?" "You're nit allowed that", have you tested, whats the result"...Etc.
Nobody asked about me first. It was always my diabetes.

Infact it was only a couple of years ago that I gained the courage to tell my mum that I am not her diabetic daughter... I'm her daughter....

Life is about being included, not excluded due to an illness that the person has. Son first.. Daughter first.... Without diabetes being the first subject...and that applies to all family and all friends too.

Early days for all the family and they are tough...

A counsellor a couple years ago told me how the impact of my parents actions and my diabetes diagnosis affected my thoughts thereafter. As I was actually never asked about first, it shaped my thoughts to only being 2nd best....I was 20 and nit even living at home.... But it impacted on me the fact that family and friends in those days saw the diabetes first before they saw me...

That's a fantastic thread dd, so thought provoking from someone who has been through it with their parent/s. Thanks RRB.
 

RyansMum

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Thanks for all the helpful diabetic advice that's been given, the whole point of me joining this forum was to understand diabetes better and listen to other parents and kids in same position as me and my son, as at present I have no one locally to me in the same position. The comments and thoughts of both have helped and when needed I've used the information and passed it onto Ryan when discussing our worries and concerns. It's also helped me relax a little too as I was like a woman possessed in the beginning, some might say I still am lol. I especially needed to learn more about diabetes as until my son was diagnosed I knew next to nothing about it.
I have never set food restrictions on my kids before and was only doing so on the advice of the dietician and diabetic nurse team, who clearly should know what they are talking about, but I now realise it's ok from talking to others not to be so regimented about everything - but even the experts give conflicting advice sometimes I've noticed, what we were told in beginning now differs from more recent info given to us, it makes it hard to get it right. Each person we see (and there seems to be a lot of them at the moment) has a different view. I know I'm coming across like a control freak but I'm scared he's going to get ill. Believe me id like nothing more than to go back a few months where all I had to do was nag him about homework and tidying his bedroom every now and then and leave him to his Playstation, friends and football. But I can't! I'm his mum. I will step back as I have noticed a big improvement in attitude and behaviour when I have done so but it's my job to steer him in the right direction when he looks like he's going to fall over the side.
And yes he was punished for stealing his sisters chocolate, I thank you for your comments.
 

CarbsRok

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The best thing to do is listen to the advice, then if what you and Ryan are doing works for him, then ignore the advice. Ryan has to live with diabetes 24/7 the medical staff go home at the end of the day and switch off.
As a Mum you will always worry (That's what Mum's do) I've been on insulin for 50 years and my Mum at the age of 79 still worries about me.
Ryan will have his ups and downs like everyone else diabetes and life in general wise. Just take one day at a time. HIs blood sugars are just numbers to fix or not as the case may be.
The best thing I was ever told was and is......... Having a bad day? ok tomorrows another day, so just move on.
 
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donnellysdogs

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Oh Ryansmum

Even at 20 and living away from home something else has just sprung to mind....

I was put on a regimented diet by hospital. For 6 weeks I cried myself to sleep - "why me?"

However, I learnt then that actually I could not be regimented and I could cheat (a liitle-not alot!!). That was what turned my thoughts to better ones. However, then I had to battle with everyone elses opinions of what I could eat and when etc....(Diabetic daughter.. Not daughter)...

Realising I could have what I wanted when I wanted was a turn round for me. I learnt what affected my bloods etc but I could still eat choc or icecream etc if going to my mums for Sunday lunch I no longer felt my body was horrible, just that It was a battle with others opinions.

30 years + on, no complications at all. So from my experience as a T1- a little of what you enjoy is great and hasn't done me any harm at all. The only harm was the mother of all "are you allowed thats?"
 
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Jaylee

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I found my dad more laid back & actually gave me credit for knowing what I was doing as a kid... Bless him.
When he got dementia I noticed my mum taking the same old school naggy approach as his carer.. Where as taking a leaf out of his book. I found a lot less conflict with regards to cooperation in doing the right thing.. ;)
 
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