Terminal and. Scared - UPDATE !

[kman]

My day was good thanks, busy at work and when I got home me mam rang me n said she was doing mince and dumplings for tea so me n the dog were straight round, drooling lol then a nice walk in the sun to the park so topsy (and me) could walk off our dumplings lol

I'll be quieter coz I've pretty much used all my data up on my phone so I can't spy at work now, will have to wait till I'm home to my wifi BOOOO!

Love always, Watcher xxx

Awww. Sweetie Pie. I will miss you so very much

Love Always Hun.

xxx xxx xxx

 

[kman]

Probably less scary than my "de-kilted " pics

Nooooooooooo Dont threaten me with THOSE pictures. Please !!!!!!

 

[Pipp]

Totto

You Sweet Angelic Beautiful Person,

4 weeks after your husband passed and you are Caring, Loving and Kind enough to offer advice to someone else, I am not at all sure I'd have your strength if my lovely wife Wendie had passed that recently,

You Dear Sweet Lady have me in streams of tears, and my Deepest Respect,

Firstly myself and Wendie want to offer our most Sincere Condolences, Love and great big Hugs from our Beautiful little puppy Pork Butt xxx.


You must be Devastated, how you manage to care about a stranger like me I don't know sweetie,

My pain is excrutiating and devastating, but the thing I have most trouble explaining here is I have the most wonderful teams looking after me, I attend 2 different Pain Clinics and have a Medical Psychologist heping just with coping with the Pain,

The difficult thing is that there is no way of getting away from this pain due to what is happening to the nerves in my body,

I am NOT unhappy with my care, or the pain relief efcorts from my team, They are wonderful and caring, and they explain anything and everything each step of the way,

Of course I'm not happy to still be in pain, but I do not at all believe or think It is in any way being neglected, I will talk to them about a Pump ! From what you have said it would be wonderful for me, and most of all for Wendie as I hate seeing her face when I am in such awful pain, it hurts her even more than Me xxx.

I Love You already as a Dear Friend, and I hope you will stay with me here on the thread for as long as you feel comfortable or able to considering how raw it must all still be for you sweetie xxx.

Please know our Prayers and Thoughts are with you, as I stated before you are nothing short of Angelic, Wendie says to tell you she also is a right mess with tears all down her face,

Thank You so very very much for being so very Brave, Kind, Caring and most of all Loving your Tenderness and Sweetness have driven deep into our heart's.

Love and Hugs Always Dear Lady,

Kevin Wendie Dayne, Delta and Pork Butt.

xxx xxx xxx.

@Totto

@kman
Have you told your consultants at the pain clinics and your psychologist just how bad the pain is? Perhaps you could show them your posts on here. (At least the psychologist) because it seems something is not being done right if your pain has been so excruciating for such a long time. It is truly awful if they are not providing the treatment you need. I feel quite angry on your behalf if you are not being taken seriously by so many medical professionals. Nobody should be left with such physical and emotional pain you describe when there are treatments available.
@Totto is right. There are medications that are by pump infusion which can help you.

 

[satindoll]

@kman

@Pipp and @Totto are right, you should not be suffering this amount of pain, I think its disgusting that the pain clinics and your gp are allowing you to suffer in this way.
I have to say what I find strange is your reluctance to get this sorted, when my poor old dad was dying from Emphysema and finding the pain of scrabbling for breath too much the help he got was 1st class, he had a night nurse who was there to give him pain killing injections throughout the night which meant he and my mum could get some sleep and relief, and these were the days before pumps for drugs, surely this is something you should be sorting for Wendie's sake if not your own.
Personally I would not be waiting for 2 weeks to chat to my gp about this, and would have a few words to say to the consultants at the pain clinic.

 

[Mike d]

@kman

Could you perhaps consider using community (even amateur) radio, (assuming you have access of course) to get your message across about your life's journey and your conditions? Would educate others no end I'd suspect.

 

[satindoll]

@kman

Could you perhaps consider using community (even amateur) radio, (assuming you have access of course) to get your message across about your life's journey and your conditions? Would educate others no end I'd suspect.

Sounds like a good idea to me, anyway to get the message across has to help someone, somewhere, sometime.

 

[kman]

@kman

@Pipp and @Totto are right, you should not be suffering this amount of pain, I think its disgusting that the pain clinics and your gp are allowing you to suffer in this way.
I have to say what I find strange is your reluctance to get this sorted, when my poor old dad was dying from Emphysema and finding the pain of scrabbling for breath too much the help he got was 1st class, he had a night nurse who was there to give him pain killing injections throughout the night which meant he and my mum could get some sleep and relief, and these were the days before pumps for drugs, surely this is something you should be sorting for Wendie's sake if not your own.
Personally I would not be waiting for 2 weeks to chat to my gp about this, and would have a few words to say to the consultants at the pain clinic.

I am not reluctant to get it sorted, and as I say the Pain Clinics at Leicester General Hospital and Leicester Royal Infirmary are wonderful,

There are problems with me having certain meds, but on my next appointment I will ask about what others I might be able to have, and as for chatting to the GP i am going to see her and have an appointment for the day after she is back, I did not mean I was waiting for everything elseuntil after that, only that I couldn't see her until then, and I consult with her on all my care, that's all !

Again believe me we are doinv everyfhing we can, and I always const Wendie and she is always there with me whenever possible,

I love Wendie more than Life, Don't ever think I am not thinking of her, I may slip for a moment, but that is a,

I'm sorry you thjnk so little of me, I'm sure it's just a misunderstanding. And that you would think better of me bad I explained myself properly, Sorry,

 

[kman]

I just get so very Tired, Physically, Mentally, Emotionally and Spiritually xxx.

 

[kman]

So tired that I can't Think

 

[Sable_Jan]

Think you best try take a nap.....weighed up against the not sleeping later still sounds like a kip is needed...you WERE awake at 5am if I recall correctly from the time of one of your earlier posts....

 

[Sable_Jan]

Or if.not a kip go snuggle up on sofa with Wendie, Pork Butt & Delta

 

[Pipp]

Whoa, Kevin. I don't see anyone here saying anything to suggest they think so little of you. After all, you have alerted a lot of people to the danger of not controlling their BG levels. You have told people not to be like you. I hope people take notice and heed your warning.
What I believe is being meant in recent posts is that people cannot understand why the pain consultants would allow you to suffer the torment you do. After all, despite any other conditions requiring medication, when someone is terminally ill, as you have been for a long time, the most important thing is pain relief. So other medications can be stopped and pain management become the main focus. I mean, if your pain is stopping you from sleeping and making you so tired you are not able to think, something needs to be done. I have seen people transformed in their last months of life, from being screaming in pain and naturally depressed about that, to being able to go out socially and enjoy life until the very last day. Surely you deserve that too?

 

[Jaylee]

I just get so very Tired, Physically, Mentally, Emotionally and Spiritually xxx.

Hi Kman,

I just spent time reading your thread & have come to this point.
Along the journey you have taken me I found your posts energetic & inspirational in nature.
The advice you have been given by contributors along the way has been compassionate & practical. To which I wholeheartedly agree with based on my own experiences with helping others to pass on with dignity.
I have no wish to add anymore on the subject. But I will open up a little & mention I am not a spiritual person. I believe it's what you leave behind for others that count when the time finally comes..

If you wouldn't mind? I will offer one thought to you that may help to continue your brave documenting that would help others & also conserve your energy.
I notice you have a kindle tablet at your disposal. Why not set up a video blog on Youtube?

We all live & learn from eachother.

Wishing you peace.

J>

 

[kman]

Once Again

Let me just state here

Everything I have said is the Truth and 100% Honest to the Best of my Knowledge

I am Dying, I have only around 8 months to live

At least 1. Member of the Forum other than my family has met me, and has seen I am for real,

Those who for whatever reason seem to doubt me, please I am being completey Honest,

I'm sorry if the way I bave expressed and told my story has made you in anyway doubt me,

And again you are ALL invited to my Funeral, Though I won't invite you to join me in the box !

Please stay with me as this journey nears it's end. ...

Love and Hugs Always.

xxx.

@Mrsass

@Sable_Jan

@Enclave

@Gezzabelle

@Totto

 

[Pipp]

Hi Kman,

I just spent time reading your thread & have come to this point.
Along the journey you have taken me I found your posts energetic & inspirational in nature.
The advice you have been given by contributors along the way has been compassionate & practical. To which I wholeheartedly agree with based on my own experiences with helping others to pass on with dignity.
I have no wish to add anymore on the subject. But I will open up a little & mention I am not a spiritual person. I believe it's what you leave behind for others that count when the time finally comes..

If you wouldn't mind? I will offer one thought to you that may help to continue your brave documenting that would help others & also conserve your energy.
I notice you have a kindle tablet at your disposal. Why not set up a video blog on Youtube?

We all live & learn from eachother.

Wishing you peace.

J>

That would be fantastic. I am sure more people would get you message that way, Kevin.

 

[Pipp]

Once Again

Let me just state here

Everything I have said is the Truth and 100% Honest to the Best of my Knowledge

I am Dying, I have only around 8 months to live

At least 1. Member of the Forum other than my family has met me, and has seen I am for real,

Those who for whatever reason seem to doubt me, please I am being completey Honest,

I'm sorry if the way I bave expressed and told my story has made you in anyway doubt me,

And again you are ALL invited to my Funeral, Though I won't invite you to join me in the box !

Please stay with me as this journey nears it's end. ...

Love and Hugs Always.

xxx.

@Mrsass

@Sable_Jan

@Enclave

@Gezzabelle

@Totto

I see I am not on your list. I guess that means you include me in the doubters? Sorry, all I want is to provide encouragement to get the pain relief you need so your last months can be spent with some quality of life. For you, Wendie, your mum and your son. Your loved ones can be left with happy memories then.
Regards
Pipp

 

[Enclave]

stay strong sending positive thoughts

 

[Pipp]

stay strong sending positive thoughts

I need them too.

 

[kman]

I need them too.

Positive and Definitely freindly thoughts coming your way, Please don't think otherwise, it's just sometimes the thread Overwhelms me LOL, and I have to ask people to step back a little, you werent on thelist Pipp because I dont know you like the others, that's all honestly,

Anyway stay Positive, Stay Strong and Stay Here !

I'll never push aside anyone with the best interests of my family in mind. ....

Hugs.

PS. Pipp. A list all of your own.

@Pipp

 

[Sable_Jan]

Hi Kevin

Just seen all the lovely photos of you, Wendie & Pork Butt and your outings on FB...... He so does seem to be sulking with his new leather harness on......and love the photo of him kissing his girlfriend....and being a baby on Mummy's lap....

Shared yesuntiltheend and the marriage posts too....

BTW - am with you for the whole journey