Dealing with well intended advice

Doczoc

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424
Since being diagnosed, lots of people have asked me what I'm doing to manage the diabetes. I tell them that I'm following a low carb diet, eating plenty of fibrous carbs in the form of green leaves, only using olive oil and butter to cook with, lots of chicken fish etc. They've all gone away away quite skeptical only to return a few days later, having spoken to a health care relative, friend or someone they know with diabetes, to tell me I'm doing it wrong and need lots of carbs. I then try to explain why I'm reducing carbs AGAIN and they seem compelled to defend the NHS position and start and arguement.

After a week of this, I apparently offended a colleague yesterday, whose girlfriend is a clinical pharmacist, when he pulled me to one side and said ,

"Apparently it's complex carbs that you need to be eating".

I wanted t scream, "Have you not been listening g to me all week! I know what complex carbs are ***"

I again, explained about this website and others' experiences and how my own morning figures had plummeted from 15.9 to 4.9 in a week, but he took the hump saying "I'll tell my girlfriend she's thick and useless cos she works for the NHS"

I don't want to fall out with anyone, as I'm not a stroppy person, but I need some strategies to fend this off. How can I say, "thank you, but no thank you" when advice is coming my way? I can't lie about what I'm doing it's not in my nature.
 

caitycakes1

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154
Most of us know exactly how you feel. I too am low carbing (type 1) and when people ask me what I eat I give them the stock in trade NHS answer of "it's just healthy eating" and go on my merry way doing exactly what I think is "healthy" for me which of course is low carbing. The only time I will go into detail re low carb is if a fellow diabetic asks. Otherwise, it's not worth the hassle. I have better things to do with my time than argue diet with a non-diabetic.

Caitycakes x
 

sugarless sue

Master
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Rude people! Not being able to do the things I want to do.
It's a bit like when you're pregnant ,you get every man and his dog giving you well-meaning advice! You smile ,nod and move on and then do exactly what you want to do!!Saves a lot of hassle.If anyone is genuinely interested then I tell them,otherwise they just get a stock answer!
 

Doczoc

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424
caitycakes1 said:
Most of us know exactly how you feel. I too am low carbing (type 1) and when people ask me what I eat I give them the stock in trade NHS answer of "it's just healthy eating" and go on my merry way doing exactly what I think is "healthy" for me which of course is low carbing. The only time I will go into detail re low carb is if a fellow diabetic asks. Otherwise, it's not worth the hassle. I have better things to do with my time than argue diet with a non-diabetic.

Caitycakes x


I like that one thanks!
 

Doczoc

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424
sugarless sue said:
It's a bit like when you're pregnant ,you get every man and his dog giving you well-meaning advice! You smile ,nod and move on and then do exactly what you want to do!!Saves a lot of hassle.If anyone is genuinely interested then I tell them,otherwise they just get a stock answer!

I think people have been genuinely interested, just not approving of my answers LOL
 

fergus

Well-Known Member
Messages
1,439
Type of diabetes
Type 1
You are no-one these days without a food alergy or food intolerance. Join their growing ranks. You are carbohydrate intolerant! :)

Or, in more intelligent company, you could quote the vice-president of the Royal College of Surgeons: 'The body must have proteins and animal fats. It has no need for carbohydrates.'

Failing that, simply beat them about the head with a turkey leg and steal their dinner money. It's for their own good after all.

All the best,

fergus
 

Trinkwasser

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2,468
Average A1c of wild type diabetics is around 9

Average A1c of diabetics on this and other forums and newsgroups must be in the fives or including newbies low sixes

Average decrease of A1c expected by the ADA is 1 - 2% from "Medical Nutrition Therapy"

Decrease of A1c on ADA's own forums as well as elsewhere is around 5 - 8%

If DUK had a forum average A1c would probably increase

Next question?
 

VBee

Well-Known Member
Messages
145
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Diet only
Dislikes
Baked beans
I totally know where you are coming from, I had exactly the same thing. My Nan has had Type2 diabetes for years and swears by the advice she got from the doctors. I haven't spoken to her directly, as she lives a few hours away from me, but my Mum passes on her advice via the phone. I want to say to her "well if your NHS advice is so bloody good how come you are now injecting insulin when you used to just be on the drugs hmmm?" but ignorance is bliss I guess.
 

hanadr

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Hi Sue,
I bet those dogs give the best advice :lol:
 

lionrampant

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562
Healthcare professionals don't like being corrected, especially when they're wrong - and their significant others generally pick up on the habit because they like feeling superior. You'll get used to it.
 

Jem

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570
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People that feel just because diabates is a life-threatening "illness" it should be treated with kid gloves and nobody is allowed to have a laugh. My humour got me through abuse, near death experiences, serious and debilitating illnesses and lifelong pain and deformity - why give up the thing that works??
Hiya Doc, take a deep breath and nod your head - saying oooh and aaaaah alot ... then go along your own way and when you have great control, fewer health problems, have lost (any) excess weight, feel fit and strong and energetic and warded off the complications you can tell them exactly what you did.

YOU know what makes sense and although it's hard to deal with the misonceptions some people have, especially those with ingrained ideas about diabetics should and shouldn't eat (my nhs advise when I was pregnany had me pushing in excess of 100 units of humalog per meal and that advice I now consider to be frankly murderous) so although you might want to really get into helping people and offering advice and letting them know how wonderful this all is, half the time you might wanna bite your lip a bit ... it will save you a lot of stress, which as we all know, can cause high blood sugar!

All the best, keep doing wha you're doing and when somebody wants to "help" just let them know you're doing your thing and very happy thank you. See you in the old folks home in many decades :)

J/xxx
 

wiflib

Well-Known Member
Messages
1,966
Type of diabetes
Type 2 (in remission!)
Treatment type
Tablets (oral)
I have the opposite of conversations.

Now I'm three pounds from transparent, everyone is asking me how. When I tell them about the diabetes and normal BS, they then ask me how I do it. There ensues a large 'scoffing' sound despite the evidence sitting in front of them.
You should see the looks of disbelief when they see me fill my face with large quantities of cream, butter and cheese! Most think I've fallen off my diet and are expecting me to just get fat again but as for commenting on my control? they wouldn't dare. I think I'm a bit scary.


wiflib

That's just reminded me of something.
Conversation with a diabetic 'specialist' at work
me; "......and you should see what a baked potato does to my levels. I hit 10 last time I tested."
specialist; 'Good grief! What was on it?"


ho hum
 

hanadr

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My Mum tells me I cannot know better than the doctors. or her! She's 90 and they are qualified!!!
I just have motivation and a 150 IQ
 

The Governor

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Messages
134
Have you tried just laying a couple of headbutts on them?

My method tends to be - Explain, demonstrate with baseline logic, headbutt.

Not necessarily in that order :D
 

sugarless sue

Master
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10,098
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Rude people! Not being able to do the things I want to do.
The Governor said:
Have you tried just laying a couple of headbutts on them?

My method tends to be - Explain, demonstrate with baseline logic, headbutt.

Not necessarily in that order :D

Opinions posted here are not necessarily the opinions of the forum!! :lol: :lol: :lol:
 

Dennis

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Messages
2,506
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Non-insulin injectable medication (incretin mimetics)
Dislikes
People who join web forums to be agressive and cause trouble
sugarless sue said:
The Governor said:
Have you tried just laying a couple of headbutts on them?

My method tends to be - Explain, demonstrate with baseline logic, headbutt.

Not necessarily in that order :D

Opinions posted here are not necessarily the opinions of the forum!! :lol: :lol: :lol:

But as we always say, if it works for you . . . . . . . .
 

Doczoc

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424
Think I've got my responses honed now. I tell people that I'm following a diet with lots of fibrous carbs, protein and good fats. If they ask me what that means, I just say

"Oh lots of green veg and salad."

That seems to satisfy most. Some people ask what I mean by good fats (as if there could be such a thing!? LOL) so I just mention that I use extra virgin olive oil, cold pressed flax seed oil and virgin coconut oil, (I tend to forget to mention that I eat animal fat too :wink: )

Most go away fairly happy if somewhat bemused by the fact that I'm eating fat, I think the use of the terms 'extra virgin', 'virgin' and 'cold pressed' help allow them to feel ok about it LOL.

I tend to find it less hassley to extoll the 'good' things that I'm eating, rather than the 'bad' that I'm leaving out, ie, simple, refined and starchy carbs. I don't mention not eating these carbs unless really pushed.

Funily enough, last night I was chatting online to an old friend who has been diagnosed 8 months ago, I had no idea. She was chuffed that now the Metformin was kicking it (she's on twice the dosage as me) that her waking BG was now down to 7.5. I was understandabley alarmed by this and began to tell her about Bernstein et al, and my personal success in losing 2 stone since the end of November, reversing my fatty liver within one month, finally getting normal blog pressure after years of being on the verge of being medicated for it, reversal of sleep apnea, improved energy etcs. She was very interested in finding out what it was I was doing to achieve this and I told her in more detail what I felt was working for me. Then it dawned on her and she said,

"That sounds a bit like Atkins"

And then completely shut up shop! Came out with all the usual anti Atkins stuff LOL She then proceeded to tell me that she was going on Lipotim today but that she had to stop the Metforrmin because Lipotrim puts your body in ketosis. I replied, "What, like Atkins?" She failed to see the irony. I didn't go into the difference between diabetic ketoacidosis and ketosis either, seemed no point. Ah well...
 

fergus

Well-Known Member
Messages
1,439
Type of diabetes
Type 1
Doczoc, are your friend and my GP one and the same?! I need to know! :shock:

All the best,

fergus