Depression and Denial...Newbie.

gingercat

Active Member
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42
Hello, I am a newbie to this site. I must say how nice and friendly everyone is!

I am 40 years old and was diagnosed with T2 a few months ago. However, I do suffer with a mental illness which also affects my self esteem and self worth. I also have a lot of personal problems including social services intervention with my 4 children; my youngest has severe autism, global development delay and communication delay. All my children were premature from 27 weeks to 29 weeks, I had pre-eclampsia. All of them have difficulties of some kind: my eldest son has aspergers, my daughter ADHD and a heart condition, her twin brother has behavioual difficulties and my youngest has what I listed above. My depression was/is caused by an inability to forgive myself for 'inflicting' this lifelong disabilty on my darling youngest son. Yet he has made fantastic progress at the special school he attends, but still.. Anyway, my blood test Hab1(?) is at 13 (doctor says too high), my bg (done by the doctor) is in excess of 26, my cholestoral is 6.5, I have ++++ of sugar in wee and a trace of ketones. I don't eat too much but drink instead (not alcohol) I drink coffee with at least 4 sugars in and I love sugary drinks and the food I eat is very sweet. Even my morning bg (no breakfast and done my GP) was still 26. I have been prescribed metformin twice a day. But I am very erratic with taking it. My doctor is wonderful and is worried that I am not coping (she is aware of all the problems with social services and is supportive) with my diabetes and has told me she will admit me to hospital if I carry on.. I am tired, confused, dizzy, thirsty and wee alot..yet I feel that too guilty to treat myself and really don't know where or what I can do next. It is as if I believe I need to suffer as I have let my children down.
I know what I should do but can't..I don't expect anyone to be able to answer this but a message or two from some of you caring people may help as I don't get to talk to anyone.
Thanks
 

brittone05

Newbie
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4
Re: Depression and Denial...Newbie.

Hunny, I can't help from a diabetes side as i am new to all this with my hubby being diagnosed.
i would like to say though that yo usound like an amazingly strong woman who has been given her fair share of life's downs. Personal issues can be a awful strain on us when we have so many other things happening but the important thing for you is to realise that you have been strong enough to ask for help managing your diabetes and essentially, the things that will follow.

Take some weight off your shoulders and try, as hard as it is, to remove some of the guilt that you carry when you talk about treating yourself for your diabetes.

Get your meds sorted, take them regularly and show the world, social services and your children that you can come out of this the other side still fighting.

I am, as I say, new here but if you ever need to offload your brain hunny feel free to drop me a message and I will always listen :)

Em xxx
 

noblehead

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So sorry to read your post, but perhaps by admitting you into hospital they can then begin to reduce your blood glucose and stabilise things overall. Do tell your gp that this may be the best possible solution to your present predicament.

Nigel
 

gingercat

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42
Hi Brittone05, thanks for your kind words.

Hi Noblehead, thank you for your reply.

I knew I had come to the right place.
 

totsy

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hi there and welcome to the forum,
wow what a lot you have to put up with... im type 1 so cant comment too much on type 2 but you definately need to get your bloods down, i too have had a ****** life and also suffered badly with mental health problems yrs ago so can definately see what u mean there and the blaming yourself is similar to me back then, i wasnt in a good place mentally when diagnosed but in a way my diagnosis gave me a big kick up the bum and got me onto the road to recovery,
i sympathise with the childrens problems as one of mine has been having problems for many yrs and is awaiting aspergers testing,
if u ever want a chat just let me know
amanda :)
 

gingercat

Active Member
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totsy said:
hi there and welcome to the forum,
wow what a lot you have to put up with... im type 1 so cant comment too much on type 2 but you definately need to get your bloods down, i too have had a ****** life and also suffered badly with mental health problems yrs ago so can definately see what u mean there and the blaming yourself is similar to me back then, i wasnt in a good place mentally when diagnosed but in a way my diagnosis gave me a big kick up the bum and got me onto the road to recovery,
i sympathise with the childrens problems as one of mine has been having problems for many yrs and is awaiting aspergers testing,
if u ever want a chat just let me know
amanda :)

Hi totsy,
thanks for your support. I did go to the dr again today. She wants me to have a mental health assessment but I have declined. She is very worried as my recent bloods have shown that my potassium and sodium levels are too low and she said that my kidneys are now working too hard! Can't win I thought it was when they have too much you need to worry! Anyway I still am none the wiser.
 

totsy

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hopefully they will get u sorted soon, give me a shout if u need a chat :)