I'm giving up..

[novowolf]

As the subject bar says i'm giving up... ive lived the diabetic life for 5 years now and erratic bloods sugars no matter what i do and constant injections are just something i cant handle anymore... that alongside the pain of injections and the inconvenience of blood testing have practically drove me into a depression ...I have no one to talk to as my family and friends have their own problems and i wouldnt want to burden them with this anyway.. I am not looking for sympathy .. i just had to put this down somewhere where someone would have some idea what i was talking about...

 

[Dubai expat]

I use to feel like that, especially when I was pregnant. It seemed it didn't matter what I did or ate nothing could bring my levels under control. I've been T1 for 14 years, diagnosed at the age of 34, my daughter was also diagnosed T1 last year at the age of 21 and is still struggling. I'm really on top of it now, most days my sugar levels are spot on, I probably have a few to many lows but I'm a SAHM so don't go at to work and can cope with them. About 5 years ago, I was probably about 2st overweight and decided to join Slimming World, it really changed my life. Not only did I lose the weight, but almost halved my insulin intake by just changing what I ate. Don't give up trying as the dangers of uncontrolled levels are very bad as you probably already know, use this forum to chat to people and get the support you obviously need, what about your medical team, are they not advising you on what to do?


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[iHs]

Hi

There's an awful lot said for using insulin to carb ratios (instead of guesswork) and bg testing to determine what ratios should be used but the beauty of using ratios and bg testing is that better bg levels can be achieved and within reason, people can eat whatever amount of food they want.

Basal/bolus insulin regimes which ideally require ratios, are not for everyone though so if doing 4-6 injections is making you feel down in the dumps, then its worth asking for twice daily insulin regimes which just require 2 injections. The drawback to using twice daily insulins is that specific amounts of carbohydrate need to be eaten about 6 times a day but twice daily regimes are easier for many to adhere to whereas basal/bolus is not depending on how many injections and where you do them, affects your everyday life. As a general rule, once an amount of carb to be eaten can be determined initially by bg testing 6 times a day, once that is done, then bg testing about 4 times per day is ok along with testing bg before driving of course.

Twice daily insulin regimes don't get in the way of having a good time when going out as there's no need to take an insulin pen or bg meter if you don't want to as long as the correct amount of carb is eaten to keep bg levels ok and going out is not going to clash with the need to do an injections.

 

[noblehead]

Everybody will understand where your coming from Novowolf as diabetes is life changing in so many ways.

I was just reading your previous posts and seen that your diabetes team were pleased with your control post-DAFNE and you were hoping to get on an insulin pump come November, try and persevere and stay focused on that and hopefully the pump will turn things around for you.

Take care!

 

[anna29]

Hi

There's an awful lot said for using insulin to carb ratios (instead of guesswork) and bg testing to determine what ratios should be used but the beauty of using ratios and bg testing is that better bg levels can be achieved and within reason, people can eat whatever amount of food they want.

Basal/bolus insulin regimes which ideally require ratios, are not for everyone though so if doing 4-6 injections is making you feel down in the dumps, then its worth asking for twice daily insulin regimes which just require 2 injections. The drawback to using twice daily insulins is that specific amounts of carbohydrate need to be eaten about 6 times a day but twice daily regimes are easier for many to adhere to whereas basal/bolus is not depending on how many injections and where you do them, affects your everyday life. As a general rule, once an amount of carb to be eaten can be determined initially by bg testing 6 times a day, once that is done, then bg testing about 4 times per day is ok along with testing bg before driving of course.

Twice daily insulin regimes don't get in the way of having a good time when going out as there's no need to take an insulin pen or bg meter if you don't want to as long as the correct amount of carb is eaten to keep bg levels ok and going out is not going to clash with the need to do an injections.

This is a 'great post' as it is what I actually do ...
The 2 split basal insulin does give me much more flexibility as I am a tiny nibbler by habit .
Often would/do skip meals , cant do any breakfast at all .
Yet come 11am I do need a 2nd coffee and a small piece of fruit sorts me out I have found .

As iHs says a little bit of something carby will keep the levels steady .
I have things like a couple of crackers with cheese on sliced tomatoes on the top .
It works well with me .

I couldn't handle a 4-6 daily basal/bolus regime so the 2 split basal only suits me brilliantly . :thumbup:
We are all different in our needs and how we handle things too .

Hope this can help .

Anna .

 

[Daibell]

Hi. You have my sympathy as although I inject I don't have to do 4 times or whatever a day. You mention painful injections? I'm lucky that most of my injections are virtually painless. What approach are you using? I use cartridges with a 4mm needle which is really fine and obviously short to suit me as I'm average weight. I wonder whether your injection approach could be optimised? Apologies if you are already using the best match possible but worth asking

 

[Robinredbreast]

As the subject bar says i'm giving up... ive lived the diabetic life for 5 years now and erratic bloods sugars no matter what i do and constant injections are just something i cant handle anymore... that alongside the pain of injections and the inconvenience of blood testing have practically drove me into a depression ...I have no one to talk to as my family and friends have their own problems and i wouldnt want to burden them with this anyway.. I am not looking for sympathy .. i just had to put this down somewhere where someone would have some idea what i was talking about...

Hi novowolf I think a lot of type 1's will feel the way you do or have felt that way. It's an uphill struggle at times and we know it's not going to 'get better or disappear' it's there for life. I have, in the past few days, being feeling very low, cancelled a hospital appointment, not taking all my meds( but always the Insulin and I carb count too). I am also Type 1, for 24 years now and have been going through a few diabetic things and finding it all very lonely

I can only offer you support and some comfort, as I'm sure many people on the forum will be doing the same.

Have you seen your GP about how you are feeling? Or what about trying to get in touch with other type 1's in your area, to set up a local support group, so you could get practical, face to face advice, help or just someone to off load too.

I wish you all the best and I hope you can see a brighter future very soon.

Take care RRB

 

[LisaMcintyre]

I feel exactly the same. Feel near breaking point.


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[Robinredbreast]

I feel exactly the same. Feel near breaking point.


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My darling daughter gives me the strength to carry on, but it's still difficult..........

RRB

 

[anniehi41]

Re: I'm giving up.

I have been very near to breaking point a few times this last year after having a total pancreas removal. My BGs are all over the place and to top it all I have to take loads Creon capsules to help me digest my food. I read on this forum about people maintaining their BGs around 4 to 6, and wonder how on earth they do this! No matter how I try I cannot get it right. I carb count and keep records but every day is different. I do know how you feel but don't give up, I always think of the people who are much worse off than I am and that keeps me trying.

 

[donnellysdogs]

Annie

Anybody able to manage their levels to 4-6 as a type 1 have no life, or living in hypo land. Its impossible...

To OP are you still wanting a pump? Please dont give up. I so remember crying myself to sleep every night nigh on 30 years ago thinking "why me?".
Still here and ok......ups and downs aling tbe way both physically and mentally....

Honest, we'll all help you through... Is ther one particular thing that is really bothering you above all else?

 

[SamJB]

I agree, maintaining levels of 4-6 is near on impossible for T1s. It is possible to stay in single figures for most of the time, though. I've spent 9 of my 10 years as a diabetic with fairly erratic levels. Only brought it truly under control last year when I decided to low carb. I last had a high 2 weeks ago. Couldn't manage 2 days before I low carbed.

 

[donnellysdogs]

Every day will also always be different. You'll eat the same, do the same... But temperature will be different, hormones too, stress as well!!! - nothing is pure and simple anymore.

We just have to aim to keep our levels between 4 and 8 with minimal variances... And the hope we dont get run over by a bus!!!!!

None of us know our future lives... We just have to balance them the best we can.

 

[RachelBryson]

Don't let Type 1 rule your life, you control it! If you don't look after yourself, no one else is going to!
And what if you do give up? Stop blood monitoring, stop injecting and eat what you want. Well, it'll be a slow and agonising way to the hospital...

I may seem harsh, and sound like I have it all sorted. I don't. I have had Type 1 for 13 years now, my HbA1c has never been below 7, is currently 8.3%. My blood glucose is either well over 10, or below 4 - seldom 4-6! But I take the rap for that, kidneys go, ketones set in. But it's up to me to fix it, or live with the consequences. And by the way, I'm a Nutrition graduate, some may say I should know better. We're only human though!

My mum has had Type 1 for 45 years now. She had two children, two marriages, a couple of degrees and is a very successful business woman. She has thee worst blood glucose control and diet I have ever seen! But she doesn't let it dictate her life, then. or now.

Think positive, every day at a time. And don't let highs, or lows prevent you from trying to get it right the next day!
You say you are waiting for an insulin pump, hold in there! My best friend spent her school years in hospital, only when she got her pump did her control improve significantly.
Injections and blood monitoring take seconds to do. And injections shouldn't be so painful. Use new needles not blunt, and try get smaller length needles.

I wish you all the luck! Hopefully chatting to people on this forum, and realising you are not alone might give you some comfort

 

[pinkpolo121]

Hi
i already feel like giving up and i have only been T1 for 7 weeks!! I was told i was T2 2 years ago then last year i went on the extreme diet ward tv program got told i lost my diabetes and then had a DKA and now have three new friends for life ( insulin pens and bs machine). I am already fed up of Hypos, having no one understand and explaining till im blue in the face that it isnt as easy as people think.

i have found this forum really helpful reading that im not the only one out there is fed up. I just hate having more questions then answers and having such an eventful 2 years, i really just this to be a nasty dream but I dont really believe it to be true xx

 

[samroboli]

Don't let Type 1 rule your life, you control it! If you don't look after yourself, no one else is going to!
And what if you do give up? Stop blood monitoring, stop injecting and eat what you want. Well, it'll be a slow and agonising way to the hospital...

I may seem harsh, and sound like I have it all sorted. I don't. I have had Type 1 for 13 years now, my HbA1c has never been below 7, is currently 8.3%. My blood glucose is either well over 10, or below 4 - seldom 4-6! But I take the rap for that, kidneys go, ketones set in. But it's up to me to fix it, or live with the consequences. And by the way, I'm a Nutrition graduate, some may say I should know better. We're only human though!

My mum has had Type 1 for 45 years now. She had two children, two marriages, a couple of degrees and is a very successful business woman. She has thee worst blood glucose control and diet I have ever seen! But she doesn't let it dictate her life, then. or now.

Think positive, every day at a time. And don't let highs, or lows prevent you from trying to get it right the next day!
You say you are waiting for an insulin pump, hold in there! My best friend spent her school years in hospital, only when she got her pump did her control improve significantly.
Injections and blood monitoring take seconds to do. And injections shouldn't be so painful. Use new needles not blunt, and try get smaller length needles.

I wish you all the luck! Hopefully chatting to people on this forum, and realising you are not alone might give you some comfort

What a brilliant post Rachel, well put : )

I can totally relate to wanting to give up, no day is the same and when you think you know what you are doing, you truly don't, but we are stuck with this, there is no option of giving up, just plodding and getting on, surely giving up is far far worse? I have been diabetic nearly 20 years yet know so little about it, lots of questions (ok a few) and learn new things off this forum whenever I get time to come on - not often enough with a 7 month old. I just came on to do a post of my own and got way layed!! A post on splitting my lantus, first time today with only a bit of telephone advise prior off my diabetic nurse this morning, so after having 12 of my 20 units at 9pm I am very nervous about low's overnight!! so I am up researching instead of sleeping : (

I am sorry you have felt like giving up, it will get better, 5 years isn't that long really, I think at 5 years of being a diabetic I wasn't very educated about it at all and just bumbled on, the more educated about it you become the better it is. I am sorry, I haven't helped, I am tired and possibly having a hypo (about to test honest) but I just wanted to let you know youre not alone, like everyone on here wants to I guess, and yes family don't understand, but its not easy to understand I guess, but you can really tell when they are just not listening, just umming and ahhing in all the right / wrong places!! x

 

[Juicyj]

Here's something I read yesterday and hope will give inspiration to any type 1 who's feeling down:

Problems? No Problem

“You're having problems? No problem.” That's what I try to tell myself when I begin to feel overwhelmed. And then I remind myself that the only people I am aware of who don’t have troubles are gathered in peaceful, little neighborhoods. There is never a care, never a moment of stress and never an obstacle to ruin a day. All is calm. All is serene. Most towns have at least one such worry-free zone. We call them cemeteries.

But if you’re still breathing, you have difficulties. It’s the way of life. And believe it or not, most of your problems may actually be better for you than you think. Let me explain.

Maybe you have seen the Great Barrier Reef, stretching some 1,800 miles from New Guinea to Australia. Tour guides regularly take visitors to view the reef. On one tour, the guide was asked an interesting question. “I notice that the lagoon side of the reef looks pale and lifeless, while the ocean side is vibrant and colorful,” a traveler observed. “Why is this?”

The guide gave an interesting answer: “The coral around the lagoon side is in still water, with no challenge for its survival. It dies early. The coral on the ocean side is constantly being tested by wind, waves, storms – surges of power. It has to fight for survival every day of its life. As it is challenged and tested it changes and adapts. It grows healthy. It grows strong. And it reproduces.” Then he added this telling note: “That’s the way it is with every living organism.”

That’s how it is with people. Challenged and tested, we come alive. Like coral pounded by the sea, we grow. Physical demands can cause us to grow stronger. Mental and emotional stress can produce tough-mindedness and resiliency. Spiritual testing can produce strength of character and faithfulness.

So, you have problems – no problem. Just tell yourself, “There I grow again!”

 

[SandyDee]

There is a very close link between diabetes and depression and a lot of the connected medications can also make the depression worse. I am of course talking from experience. I have felt just as you do and although this doesn't really help getting better control is one of the few things that will make you feel better. Control is easier with the pump because you can fine tune it, so if you can get one grab it! I have been on the pump for 5 years now and my control is still bad but so much easier than before and I hope given time even I can get it under control. My HBA1C has improved it's the day to day I struggle with. Try to tell someone how you feel.

 

[novowolf]

hi guys thanks for all the words of inspiration ive got myself back on track after waking up on monday almost unable to go to college... tbh im not surprised with a blood sugar of 32 and ketones of 6.1!! im honestly luck i didnt need to be hospitalised thank god!! but yh i thought id let you all know that im back on track i just had a "breaking point" so to speak when i posted this but all is good now

 

[Lealea83]

Glad to hear it! Keep writing on here about the good days and the bad


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