ah yes LIFE! It's a thing isn't it? Can relate to a lot of this and the 3am think-storm. These middle age years are challenging for sure. I suspect old age isn't a walk in the park either but I never would be a teenager again I cried when I got the T2 diagnosis because it was yet another thing in the car pile up of things in my life. Honestly it looked like the Blues Brothers around here. Might be still does but I'm wearing shades (at night). Hugs to you in what sounds a difficult time.