Stuff you didn't know you didn't know!

WhitbyJet

Well-Known Member
Messages
1,597
Stuff you didn't know you didn't know!
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Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.
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Coca-Cola was originally green.
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It is impossible to lick your elbow.
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The State with the highest percentage of people who walk to work: Alaska
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The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28%
(now get this . . .)
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The percentage of
North America that is wilderness: 38%
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The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven:
$16,400
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The average number of people airborne over the U.S.

in any given hour: 61,000
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Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
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The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.
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The San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments.
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Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:
Spades - King David
Hearts - Charlemagne
Clubs -Alexander, the Great
Diamonds - Julius Caesar
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111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
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If a statue in the park of a person on a horse
has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle.
If the horse has one front leg in the air,
the person died because of wounds received in battle.
If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes
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Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4, John Hancock and Charles Thomson.
Most of the rest signed on August 2, but the last signature wasn't added until 5 years later.
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Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?
A. Their birthplace
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Q. Most boat owners name their boats.
What is the most popular boat name requested?
A.
Obsession
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Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until youwould find the letter 'A'?

A. One thousand
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Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes,
windshield wipers and laser printers have in common?

A. All were invented by women.
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Q. What is the only
food that doesn't spoil?
A. Honey
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Q. Which day are there more collect calls
than any other day of the year?
A. Father's Day
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In Shakespeare's time,
mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes.
When you pulled on the ropes, the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the
phrase . . . 'Goodnight, sleep tight'
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It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply
his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink.
Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month,
which we know today as the honeymoon.
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In English pubs, ale
is ordered by pints and quarts. So in old England, when
customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them 'Mind your pints and quarts, and settle down.'

It's where we get the phrase 'mind your P's and Q's'
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Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked
into the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups.
When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. 'Wet your whistle' is the phrase inspired by this practice.
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At least 75% of people who read this will try
to lick their elbow!
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YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING
IN 2012 WHEN . . .
1. You accidentally
enter your PIN on the microwave.

2. You haven't played solitaire with
real cards in years.

3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers
to reach your family of three.
4. You e-mail the person who
works at the desk next to you.

5. Your reason for not staying in touch
with friends and family is that they
don't have e-mail addresses.

6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your
cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you
carry in the groceries.

7. Every commercial on television
has a web site at the bottom of the screen

8. Leaving the house without your cell phone,
which you didn't even have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and
you turn around to go and get it

10. You get up in the morning and go on line
before getting your coffee

11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. :)

12 You're reading this and
nodding and laughing.

13. Even worse, you know exactly
to whom you are going to forward this message.

14. You are too busy
to notice there was no #9 on this list.

15. You actually scrolled back up to check that
there wasn't a #9 on this list.

~~~~~~~~~~~AND FINALLY~~~~~ ~~~~~~~

NOW you're LAUGHING at yourself!
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused!" (Unknown Author)
 

Superchip

Well-Known Member
Messages
512
Dislikes
GP's, Diabetes Nurses.Crazy NHS guidelines on diet for Diabetics, they are seeing off millions.
Cheap Whisky !
Just found this Whitby ! Bloody brilliant !
How are you doing ? Last time we spoke you were recupperating.

All the very best Superchip
 

Superchip

Well-Known Member
Messages
512
Dislikes
GP's, Diabetes Nurses.Crazy NHS guidelines on diet for Diabetics, they are seeing off millions.
Cheap Whisky !
And now it's over to me......

When the white missionaries came to Africa they had the Bible and we had the land. They said 'Let us pray.' We closed our eyes. When we opened them we had the Bible and they had the land.
> ~ Desmond Tutu

*****

America is the only country where a significant proportion of the population believes that professional wrestling is real but the moon landing was faked.
> ~ David Letterman

*****

I'm not a paranoid, deranged millionaire. God dammit, I'm a billionaire.
> ~ Howard Hughes

*****

After the game, the King and the pawn go into the same box.
> ~ Italian proverb

*****

Men are like linoleum floors. Lay 'em right and you can walk all over them for 30 years.
> ~ Betsy Salkind

*****

The only reason they say 'Women and children first' is to test the strength of the lifeboats.
> ~ Jean Kerr

*****

I've been married to a communist and a fascist, and neither would take out the garbage.
> ~ Zsa Zsa Gabor

*****

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't.
> ~ Jeff Foxworthy

*****

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife.
> ~ Prince Philip

*****

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.
> ~ Emo Philips.

****

Wood burns faster when you have to cut and chop it yourself.
> ~ Harrison Ford

****

The best cure for sea sickness is to sit under a tree.
> ~ Spike Milligan

*****

Lawyers believe a man is innocent until proven broke.
> ~ Robin Hall

*****

Kill one man and you're a murderer kill a million and you're a conqueror.
> ~ Jean Rostand.

*****

Having more money doesn't make you happier. I have $50 million but I'm just as happy as when I had $48 million.
> ~ Arnold Schwarzenegger.

*****

We are here on earth to do good unto others. What the others are here for, I have no idea.
> ~ WH Auden

*****

In hotel rooms I worry. I can't be the only guy who sits on the furniture naked.
> ~ Jonathan Katz

*****

If life were fair Elvis would still be alive today and all the impersonators would be dead.
> ~ Johnny Carson

*****

I don't believe in astrology. I am a Sagittarius and we're very sceptical.
> ~ Arthur C Clarke

*****

Hollywood must be the only place on earth where you can be fired by a man wearing a Hawaiian shirt and a baseball cap.
> ~ Steve Martin

*****

Home cooking: where many a man thinks his wife is.
> ~ Jimmy Durante

*****

As I hurtled through space, one thought kept crossing my mind - every part of this rocket was supplied by the lowest bidder.
> ~ John Glenn

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If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat?
> ~ Steven Wright

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America is so advanced that even the chairs are electric.
> ~ Doug Hamwell

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The first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone.
> ~ George Roberts

*****

If God had intended us to fly he would have made it easier to get to the airport
> ~ Jonathan Winters

*****

I have kleptomania, but when it gets bad, I take something for it.
> ~ Robert Benchley

Good luck....... Superchip
 

MCMLXXIII

Well-Known Member
Messages
1,823
Type of diabetes
Treatment type
Diet only
Cool:lol:

Bees shouldn't be be able to fly but they do.
I know what LASER stands for.
Vinegar is natures secret weapon.
I was sent from the past to save the future.

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Superchip

Well-Known Member
Messages
512
Dislikes
GP's, Diabetes Nurses.Crazy NHS guidelines on diet for Diabetics, they are seeing off millions.
Cheap Whisky !
I'll have a pint of what ever you are on 1973 !
 

Superchip

Well-Known Member
Messages
512
Dislikes
GP's, Diabetes Nurses.Crazy NHS guidelines on diet for Diabetics, they are seeing off millions.
Cheap Whisky !
Hi Ya Baldy !
 

MCMLXXIII

Well-Known Member
Messages
1,823
Type of diabetes
Treatment type
Diet only
Staring at a fixed point causes terrible dryness.
I love pistachios but i feel cheated by the ones that haven't split enough for me to get to the nut inside.
Salt under your fingernails.
Oh how i wish i wad middle class, with me own set of teeth and whistling in tune.


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Superchip

Well-Known Member
Messages
512
Dislikes
GP's, Diabetes Nurses.Crazy NHS guidelines on diet for Diabetics, they are seeing off millions.
Cheap Whisky !
73 - make that a gallon !
 

Superchip

Well-Known Member
Messages
512
Dislikes
GP's, Diabetes Nurses.Crazy NHS guidelines on diet for Diabetics, they are seeing off millions.
Cheap Whisky !
73 - I didn't start it !
Superchip - yes you did , you invaded this thread !

Copyright Fawlty Towers.....

OK have finished the bottle, now going out to play at the pub....

Hic Superchip


SORRY WHITBY, just a troublesome day for me !
 

MCMLXXIII

Well-Known Member
Messages
1,823
Type of diabetes
Treatment type
Diet only
Walking on the beaches staring at the peaches?
There are no peaches on a beach you freak.

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Superchip

Well-Known Member
Messages
512
Dislikes
GP's, Diabetes Nurses.Crazy NHS guidelines on diet for Diabetics, they are seeing off millions.
Cheap Whisky !
I think that 73 is a bottle up on me !