Type 1 Diabetes and BPD

[JJWM]

Hi all.

I'm after some advice. I have had diabetes since the age of 12 and have never come to terms with the condition. I have have first stages of blindness (probably 2nd stages by now) In 2006/2007 I have a very bad mental health episode. Where I got diagnosed with depression and have been on various medication for depression. Although none of these have really helped. Between 2013 and now I've had yet another mental health breakdown. This time they have diagnosed me with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder)

For anyone who doesn't know what this is. Basically, I don't deal with stress very well at all. It is virtually impossible for me to control my own emotions. I'm constantly fighting my own thoughts, and don't think I'm good enough for anything. Self harm and a number of attempted suicides. (This is only half of the story)

My consultant is a nasty person and didn't give a **** when I had "depression" I think he is one of these that think mental health is all made up. On my last visit to him. I wanted to commit suicide in that very building.

Basically when I had "depression" I stated that I would not be able to put my mind to my diabetes until my personal life was looked into and fixed. Although, now I have found out it is a personality disorder.

I'm just wondering if anyone has BPD and Type 1 diabetes, and how do you find managing your diabetes with this condition? As I said (above) I'm constantly on a fighting battle with myself and hate everything. People with BPD are well known for Drink/Drug abuse as well as crime, reckless driving, binge eating and other things.

The alcohol and binge eating I can confirm. I admit I drink a fair bit because it is an escape route. I've also noticed something else. I eat and drink a lot of sugary products (as if I wasn't diabetic) I have come to conclusion that because I have such a s*** life. I'm doing whatever I can to get that "happy fix" shall we call it? Well I'm guessing why my diabetes is always unstable (amongst other reasons) I'm using sugary drinks/sweets as fix due to the sugar and "nice taste" which is giving my mood a boost.

my plan was to try and get my back on track and sort my diabetes. Although now I have this stupid disorder and have found out that I cannot control my mood/emotions. This is going to be rather difficult/impossible. Also due to this disorder, you can get very stressed/emotional on the slightest thing. This alone will not be much good for my sugars surely?

I know already I'm basically saying to myself that I'm f*****. I'm just hoping someone can shed light/ give me hope?

 

[Robinredbreast]

Hi, so sorry to read of your conditions and how it is affecting you. A friend of mine has type 2 diabetes and has many serious mental health conditions and was recently transferred to The Priory. My friend has so many problems and her texts are truly heartbreaking at times
Just wondering if you have a social worker or a crisis team ? or could you get in touch with MIND ?
Also, have you tried writing down your thoughts and feelings on paper and then tearing them up and throwing the 'bad thoughts ' away ? Writing poems or lyrics ?
Take care and my thoughts and prayers are with you,

Best wishes RRB

 

[JJWM]

Hi RRB

I do have a crisis team. They've basically said that BPD is not a long term condition. However, after speaking to few people with the condition. It is a long term condition. it's not curable. it's just manageable.

I do write things down. I'm just too scared to read back what I've put. Writing and throwing the bad parts away, would be no good to me.

Thanks
JJ

 

[azure]

Hi JJ

Sorry you're struggling. I can understand why that makes controlling your diabetes hard.

Have you been offered or had appropriate therapies to help you manage the BPD? (Feel free not to answer that if you don't want to)

 

[JJWM]

Hi Azure

When it was being treated as "Depression" I had councillors and psychologists etc. But they never seem to help, In fact some of them seem to make it worse. I would walk into the appointment happy and walk out depressed. Now they have diagnosed me with BPD. I'm on medication which is meant to help (I wish it would help quicker) and also plans of talking therapy. I'm not sure how this going to work this time around. But I'm willing to give it ago. Other than medication and talking. That seems to be it.

One of the battles is. High blood sugars make BPD symptoms worse, and I can't take on diabetes because I'm not in the right mindset?? shall we call it?

So far my family describe talking to me as walking on eggs shells.

 

[catherinecherub]

Have you read what MIND has to say on the subject?

They also include help for family and friends.
http://mind.org.uk/information-supp...erline-personality-disorder-bpd/#.VoppsjajFDA

http://mind.org.uk/information-supp...rder-bpd/for-friends-and-family/#.VopqDTajFDA

 

[azure]

A friend at Uni was diagnosed with this. I don't know if they were on meds because I didn't like to ask, but I know they saw a psychologist for what they referred to as 'special' therapy.

The NHS site has some info about Dialectical Behaviour Therapy:

http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Borderline-personality-disorder/Pages/Treatment.aspx

I don't know if that was what my friend had, but it sounds very similar.

Scroll down that page to read about it.

 

[kevinfitzgerald]

Hi @JJWM, I am so sincerely sorry that you are going through what you have stated. I can personally relate to some of the things you have said.

I am Type 1 (34 years) and have always had difficulty in interacting with ordinary life. I have chronic GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder) which basically means that I am constantly in a state of anxiety. Everything creates issues. I analyse every minute of every day and there seems to be no respite from it. A good day is just a day when the anxiety is just tolerable.

I have been on and off of antidepressants for the the last 10 years, have attended CBT and have just recently finished seeing a psychotherapist. I am also in recovery from chronic alcoholism.

Nothing comes natural to me and I feel I have to work so hard and put so much effort into everything I do just to get through each minute of every day. It is totally and utterly debilitating at times. Sometimes I am walking the "green mile" from dusk til dawn !

Despite this though I have never given up (I am far to competitive for that!) and I fight every day. My diabetes is managed, I work and I try my best to be part of what is sometimes a very dark and morbid place.

Try to keep everything as simple as possible. Diabetes management is fundamentally three simple things. 1/ stay away from sweet sugary foods 2/ keep active every day and exercise and 3/ take your medication as prescribed. Be consistent with all three and things will improve (or you will at least dramatically slow down the damage !) Also keep in close contact with your diabetes team.

Try your very hardest to put your mind to the diabetes. The only thing you are doing by trying to fix your feelings by eating sweet things is damage to your body and you have already stated the issues with your eyes !

Regarding your consultant why do you not just ask to see a different one. You have every right so why not exercise it !

I think contacting MIND is a good idea (though you may be already doing this) and keep in contact with your crisis / mental health team. Don't give up JJWM. Fight this. I support adults with paranoid schizophrenia with forensic backgrounds and depressive Illness so I know quite a bit about the mental health system and how difficult it can be being part of it but keep going.

Regarding your diabetes try to change just one thing every day one day at a time and see how you go. Keep close to this forum as there is so much wisdom here and there will always be someone that can give words of encouragement and support.

I wish you all the very best JJWM. Keep things simple and consistent.

Kevin



.

 

[Tinyface]

Hi all.

I'm after some advice. I have had diabetes since the age of 12 and have never come to terms with the condition. I have have first stages of blindness (probably 2nd stages by now) In 2006/2007 I have a very bad mental health episode. Where I got diagnosed with depression and have been on various medication for depression. Although none of these have really helped. Between 2013 and now I've had yet another mental health breakdown. This time they have diagnosed me with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder)

For anyone who doesn't know what this is. Basically, I don't deal with stress very well at all. It is virtually impossible for me to control my own emotions. I'm constantly fighting my own thoughts, and don't think I'm good enough for anything. Self harm and a number of attempted suicides. (This is only half of the story)

My consultant is a nasty person and didn't give a **** when I had "depression" I think he is one of these that think mental health is all made up. On my last visit to him. I wanted to commit suicide in that very building.

Basically when I had "depression" I stated that I would not be able to put my mind to my diabetes until my personal life was looked into and fixed. Although, now I have found out it is a personality disorder.

I'm just wondering if anyone has BPD and Type 1 diabetes, and how do you find managing your diabetes with this condition? As I said (above) I'm constantly on a fighting battle with myself and hate everything. People with BPD are well known for Drink/Drug abuse as well as crime, reckless driving, binge eating and other things.

The alcohol and binge eating I can confirm. I admit I drink a fair bit because it is an escape route. I've also noticed something else. I eat and drink a lot of sugary products (as if I wasn't diabetic) I have come to conclusion that because I have such a s*** life. I'm doing whatever I can to get that "happy fix" shall we call it? Well I'm guessing why my diabetes is always unstable (amongst other reasons) I'm using sugary drinks/sweets as fix due to the sugar and "nice taste" which is giving my mood a boost.

my plan was to try and get my back on track and sort my diabetes. Although now I have this stupid disorder and have found out that I cannot control my mood/emotions. This is going to be rather difficult/impossible. Also due to this disorder, you can get very stressed/emotional on the slightest thing. This alone will not be much good for my sugars surely?

I know already I'm basically saying to myself that I'm f*****. I'm just hoping someone can shed light/ give me hope?

Hi, I am type 1 diabetic with borderline personality and have been searching for somebody like myself! I am labelled a brittle diabetic as never had any control of my blood sugars..would love to chat...I am 57, live in Bristol U.K..been type 1 for 17 years..Tina

 

[Julia99]

Hi all.

I'm after some advice. I have had diabetes since the age of 12 and have never come to terms with the condition. I have have first stages of blindness (probably 2nd stages by now) In 2006/2007 I have a very bad mental health episode. Where I got diagnosed with depression and have been on various medication for depression. Although none of these have really helped. Between 2013 and now I've had yet another mental health breakdown. This time they have diagnosed me with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder)

For anyone who doesn't know what this is. Basically, I don't deal with stress very well at all. It is virtually impossible for me to control my own emotions. I'm constantly fighting my own thoughts, and don't think I'm good enough for anything. Self harm and a number of attempted suicides. (This is only half of the story)

My consultant is a nasty person and didn't give a **** when I had "depression" I think he is one of these that think mental health is all made up. On my last visit to him. I wanted to commit suicide in that very building.

Basically when I had "depression" I stated that I would not be able to put my mind to my diabetes until my personal life was looked into and fixed. Although, now I have found out it is a personality disorder.

I'm just wondering if anyone has BPD and Type 1 diabetes, and how do you find managing your diabetes with this condition? As I said (above) I'm constantly on a fighting battle with myself and hate everything. People with BPD are well known for Drink/Drug abuse as well as crime, reckless driving, binge eating and other things.

The alcohol and binge eating I can confirm. I admit I drink a fair bit because it is an escape route. I've also noticed something else. I eat and drink a lot of sugary products (as if I wasn't diabetic) I have come to conclusion that because I have such a s*** life. I'm doing whatever I can to get that "happy fix" shall we call it? Well I'm guessing why my diabetes is always unstable (amongst other reasons) I'm using sugary drinks/sweets as fix due to the sugar and "nice taste" which is giving my mood a boost.

my plan was to try and get my back on track and sort my diabetes. Although now I have this stupid disorder and have found out that I cannot control my mood/emotions. This is going to be rather difficult/impossible. Also due to this disorder, you can get very stressed/emotional on the slightest thing. This alone will not be much good for my sugars surely?

I know already I'm basically saying to myself that I'm f*****. I'm just hoping someone can shed light/ give me hope?

Dialectical behavioural therapy is the treatment of choice in the NHS. Sometimes CBT is what is available and this can help. I would expect your local community mental health team is able to sort this out for you.
Don't give up and keep banging on doors until you need what you need.

 

[kitsunerin]

I know this thread is old but I am also T1 with BPD! I was just searching on a whim to see if anyone else was! Would love to talk/rant!

 

[Logan-K]

Hi all, I'm a bit late joining the conversation.
My name is Logan, I’m very sorry to hear of the struggles some of you have had. Diabetes itself can be difficult to handle without the extras on top.

I’m a type 1 diabetic, never really had control of glucose since diagnosis in 2002.

I’ve always had difficulty understanding certain things like social concepts. Spoke to medical team about suspicion of autism and now on waiting list after scoring really high on AQ50 questionnaire.

Recently been told it’s also suspected that I have EUPD (which is pretty much a new term for BPD) and complex PTSD.

For those wondering EUPD is Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder.

I’ve been started on medication to help with BPD/EUPD symptoms but I have to admit it’s overwhelming and a very difficult situation.

Although awaiting official diagnosis on these conditions, if the suspicions are correct I’m not sure how I’m to manage all of the conditions simultaneously.

I’m concerned at how much this could have been affecting things. Especially since a lot of the symptoms are ones I’ve been experiencing since childhood.

I too have had suicide attempts in the past which from what I can understand comes with BPD territory anyway.

If anyone with any of these conditions could help shed some light on how they manage, it would be a big help.

I wish you all the best of luck going forwards and hope things improve!

 

[scaryblueberry]

Hi Logan,

I’ve just been in a bit of a down period and came on here looking for others who are autistic and type 1 looking for similar management tips from others that you have asked for. Reading what you wrote made me realise I do have quite a few already and am just having a **** day with it.

I find the combo of autism and type 1 makes remembering to take insulin and stick to a routine I don’t enjoy difficult as that isn’t innate to what my deep dive brain wants and often I’ll totally forget about the diabetes needs I have. I’ve had diabetes and RA 25 years and I used to basically ignore them and ‘get on with life’ which wasn’t great as I was ‘dealing’ with stuff alone and pretending there were no issues. I’ve never managed a sustainable routine to manage my blood sugar. In the last few years this has had big more immediate and destabilising side effects than the standard dry mouth eyes, peeing all the time and bad mood. Now I get brain fog and depression if my bloods rollercoaster and everything seems to effect my bloods inconsistently.

This isn’t all doom and gloom though. I’ve been on a big health journey this year and although it’s been a lot of emotional ups and downs I’ve also learnt a lot!!! I discovered my dysregulated blood sugar was due in a large part to gut issues and I’m seeing good results with taking digestive enzymes and eating lots of mushy food as well as avoiding gluten and dairy and yeast very strictly. I’ve heard this is generally useful for neurodivergent folks. I’ve seen how getting tired/overwhelmed leads to total inability to function and manage bloods but also how dysregulated blood sugar causes depression and brain fog which is previously attributed to the RA… it’s a journey and I’m figuring out what really helps for the first time. I suspect a pump will become necessary and I might push for it. i am currently not really able to work much and am aiming to get my health in order so that’s no longer the case but I won’t lie: it is hard. The biggest take away is that stress totally messes with blood sugar. I know I should know this since forever but I didn’t believe it… now I have the gut issues a bit under control I can see much more clearly how stress can send my blood through the roof in a matter of minutes. I’ve started taking Epsom salt baths several times a week to bring those stress levels down and I know meditating helps though I’m going through a resistent period. I also learned I need to stop working in the evenings and get a better sleep routine which is so hard but as my stress levels go down is slightly easier.

I just started trying hyperbaric oxygen therapy which was recommended to me as it helps people heal fast and makes bodies work better (layman’s terms) and apparently regulate blood sugars…. The verdicts out on that so far as will have to do it a bunch to see but it’s available in the U.K. at many local ms charities for people with chronic health issues at subsidised rates. I am in early days of having any useful advice to follow (nhs has repeatedly let me down and I eventually went private when I get unwell enough to receive PIP and could afford it. The irony.

 

[Logan-K]

Hi thanks for responding to my post, it means a lot. I’m sorry you’re going through similar difficulties. I had been told by most diabetes teams that stress and illness affect glucose stability but I’ve also had doctors say it doesn’t. I think what makes it so much harder is that there’s no universal guidelines. Each NHS trust has its own opinion of ideals so it’s a minefield trying to filter facts from utter garbage.

I’m currently struggling really bad with sleep due to the complex PTSD (trauma and violence fuelled nightmares) and general worries. Also have an ongoing tribunal which really hasn’t helped my stress levels.

Managing the best I can but when I get overwhelmed it’s horrific. I’m trying to persevere through the issues but I do have days that I just feel like my life means nothing. I often wonder what is the point, I’ll live to see tomorrow but I know that I’ll suffer for it.

I tend to feel rough most days because my glucose levels are nearly always high, the only upside is I’m not entering DKA. Had a few nocturnal hypos because I’m struggling with appetite when mood is too low to give a monkeys. What hasn’t helped with those is Libre sensor doesn’t always tell me I’m in a hypo or hyper. It notifies my wife through the link-up app but not me so not good when she’s at work.

At present I’m confirmed to have retinopathy and macular oedema. I’m growing concerned that if this continues I could lose my sight altogether.

My consultant also recently said he suspected I am not taking insulin without checking my injection sites (I have lypos the size of golf balls in my legs). Of course I’m not injecting there and have been using my stomach. I told him I have been taking insulin and my wife gives me my long-acting. Also tried to tell him about the suspicions of mental health but he wouldn’t listen. I’ve lost a lot of confidence with the team over that and did make a complaint to the hospital.

I don’t always take corrections for fear of dropping too low (has happened on multiple occasions).

I’m still trying to get on top of it all and figure things out. Complex PTSD has been confirmed but still waiting for confirmation on the others. Trying to understand the conditions while struggling to correctly process information is almost impossible. I feel stuck in terms of moving forwards.

In terms of remembering insulin try to set alarms on your phone. I hope that helps, please try to take care of yourself. I’d hate to think of something awful happening to you.

Anyway, if you ever want to talk feel free to drop me a message. I’ll respond as soon as I can.

 

[TheIceQueen2012]

Heya Logan

I have Diabetes type 3c and I have a zillion other diagnosed medical conditions. I was diagnosed with EUPD in 2012. If I can answer any questions for you or be of any help to you, I am very happy to do so.