Feel a bit silly ... But I need to talk it out!

[K8TC06]

Hi all. So I've not done anything like this before, and I feel a bit daft pouring my worries out on the Internet, but I don't know anyone else with diabetes and I just need to talk. I've been Type 1 for nearly four and a half years now and I just want it to go away to be honest!

I did the DAFNE course a few months ago and it has made a difference but my levels still aren't right. My HbA1C is currently 9.3 and I'm really worried that it's not going to come down - my levels 'blip' too much! I feel bad for moaning - I have a wonderfully supportive fiancé and family but they just don't get it! My fiancé and I want to start a family but my levels just aren't right. It makes me want to cry most days but I feel like I can't tell anyone - I feel like I have to wear a mask when someone asks about how I'm doing.

My fiancé sees a lot of it but it's frustrating that he just can't understand. We had only been dating 6 months when I was diagnosed so we have made the whole journey together and he is so great with it ... But sometimes it feels like I'm on my own with this stupid thing!

I know my mentality is wrong, I'm not noting down my levels etc, but most days I don't see the point when it doesn't change anything! Sorry for the rant/moan but if anyone has any tips of how to pull myself out of this 'slump' I would really appreciate it

 

[noblehead]

Welcome to the forum

Have you checked that your basal insulin is set at the right dose, if not I suggest you do some basal checks, if your unsure how to do one have a read of the following:

http://www.salforddiabetescare.co.uk/index2.php?nav_id=1007

 

[dtennant9]

Welcome to the forum @K8TC06

Do you test before and after meals?

Why not start noting everything down and seeing how food is effecting you. Note down your BG, what you eat and how much insulin you take to see where you are going wrong.

As @noblehead has suggested some basal testing would be useful and the link provided is very good.

 

[donnellysdogs]

Posted by another member previously but it is just how us T1's think before we even get out of bed each day!!!

You're not alone.

Glad you are talking here. To be honest, as much as friends, families and fiance's try to symapthise/help/empathise. It takes a fellow diabetic to understand the complexities of feelings that we constantly carry in our luggage!!

 

[stratospheric]

That feeling never leaves completely.. I've been diabetic since i was 3. Im 24 now.. And still do cry sometimes. And you know what? That's ok. We just need to live with it and make most of it. My hba1c is over 12. I think I don't remember day i felt 100%. But...i still love n enjoy life that i have n would not exchange it for nothing. Cheer up ur not alone.

 

[K8TC06]

I haven't actually checked my basal since Christmas - thank you for reminding me I had assumed it was ok as my levels don't shoot up over night but I will be checking over the weekend. I do test regularly but I'm really bad at writing things down. I have noticed some foods affect me more than others which I find interesting.

Thanks everyone for your lovely helpful messages - it really helps to know I'm not the only one - and that I'm not being daft!

 

[noblehead]

I haven't actually checked my basal since Christmas - thank you for reminding me I had assumed it was ok as my levels don't shoot up over night but I will be checking over the weekend. I do test regularly but I'm really bad at writing things down. I have noticed some foods affect me more than others which I find interesting.

Thanks everyone for your lovely helpful messages - it really helps to know I'm not the only one - and that I'm not being daft!

Basal rates do change unfortunately, when bg controls goes out the window it's always best to start from the basics and do some basal testing, once you get that right you can then look at your I:C ratio's.


Good luck and do stick around the forum.

 

[himtoo]

welcome to the forum
everything you said will have been felt by all of us at different times in this life with D.
you took an important step towards change by sharing your feelings with this like minded community.
we will all try to help you and try to remember to take it 1 day at a time and not worry if everything does not fall into place all at once.

basal testing is the first building block of the revitalised you

 

[Robinredbreast]

I haven't actually checked my basal since Christmas - thank you for reminding me I had assumed it was ok as my levels don't shoot up over night but I will be checking over the weekend. I do test regularly but I'm really bad at writing things down. I have noticed some foods affect me more than others which I find interesting.

Thanks everyone for your lovely helpful messages - it really helps to know I'm not the only one - and that I'm not being daft!

Hi, you're certainly not daft, it's a blip along the diabetes rocky road, hopefully the path will be less bumpy for you and will be a lot smoother.

Take care and best wishes RRB

 

[smidge]

Hi k8tc06!

You've been diagnosed a little bit less than me. My partner tries to understand but hey, we both know he doesn't get it. Lol. In the end we're all on our own with this - except for everyone else with it Just try and keep on trying - we all understand!

Smidge

 

[badbrogs21]

It is hard my moods change from day to day it's hard some times you feel like no one is supporting you but they are your loved ones are always there for you I've been on that course and it didn't help Me either they are now letting me go onto an insulin pump hopefully that will help maybe you can speak to your diabetes team and give them a weeks worth of day to day living results take your blood every 2 to 4 hours so they can get a day to day insight of what like is like for you to help tackle it. WRight on paper the meals u eat the amount of cars are in the meals the times everything that u do in your day exercise etc then bring it to your health team it's 1 week that could help change your future

 

[Bebo321]

Hi all. So I've not done anything like this before, and I feel a bit daft pouring my worries out on the Internet, but I don't know anyone else with diabetes and I just need to talk. I've been Type 1 for nearly four and a half years now and I just want it to go away to be honest!

I did the DAFNE course a few months ago and it has made a difference but my levels still aren't right. My HbA1C is currently 9.3 and I'm really worried that it's not going to come down - my levels 'blip' too much! I feel bad for moaning - I have a wonderfully supportive fiancé and family but they just don't get it! My fiancé and I want to start a family but my levels just aren't right. It makes me want to cry most days but I feel like I can't tell anyone - I feel like I have to wear a mask when someone asks about how I'm doing.

My fiancé sees a lot of it but it's frustrating that he just can't understand. We had only been dating 6 months when I was diagnosed so we have made the whole journey together and he is so great with it ... But sometimes it feels like I'm on my own with this stupid thing!

I know my mentality is wrong, I'm not noting down my levels etc, but most days I don't see the point when it doesn't change anything! Sorry for the rant/moan but if anyone has any tips of how to pull myself out of this 'slump' I would really appreciate it

You're not alone in feeling a bit isolated with diabetes and great that you've voiced your concerns on the forum. This place is brilliant! - full of good advice and support.
You might like to take it one step further and meet some pretty awesome folk this Saturday, as the Gbdoc www.gbdoc.co.uk have organised a gathering (an un-conference) for people with diabetes to be held in Nottingham. An opportunity to meet, chat, share and discuss issues that matter most to you in an open and friendly environment. TeamBG www.teambloodglucose.com will have a stand there too. Loads of positivity will definitely inspire you, so get your bum in gear and come along. (Open to friends, family and fiancées!)
Keep your head up - you're doing great.

 

[Juicyj]

Hey Hun, completely normal to feel like this, when your bg isn't right it does affect your moods, so getting you basal right first should help with better daytime results, it's a constant battle to keep walking on the tightrope just one small thing can throw it all off balance but when it comes good again you will feel a lot better.

Everyone here knows what your going through, to be honest I've been having a rough patch for a while but bless my DSN she's helping me through it and am trying a new basal now which I've already seen an improvement with but to be honest most days it hurts my head but just get on with it. I don't think of perfection with my results I just think be easy of yourself and do the best you can do and that's all anyone can do, we are given the tools it's just down to us as to how we use them. I'm sure to everyone around me I seem in control but no one but you knows how much effort we put into this.

Hopefully with some adjustments to your basal you'll come right, good luck

 

[Lordy100]

I've completed the Dafne course as well and it did improve things but didn't make me perfect. To be perfect takes time and sometimes we are just too busy getting on with daily life. My HBA1c has finally started to come down but only due to regular blood testing and adjustment if hi/lo. I've had to become a lot more "responsible" because I got my driving licence changed so I can drive a horsebox and therefore only get a licence for a year at a time. You have to show 3 months worth of blood testing and its become more routine for me to do it rather than miss it. However, there are still the odd blip when you are feeling irritated by something and you reach for the food! Good luck, if you can test more regularly it will help as will the food diary so you realise what upsets you.

 

[lisacp]

Have you spoken to your diabetic nurse? I am just going through the pump application process and the nurse asked me to email her detailed diaries of meals, blood sugars and insulin doses. They are fantastic at looking at them and getting back to me the same day with helpful advise on where to adjust my insulin doses. It is a bit of a drag weighing the food, calculating the carbs and recording all of the info. I found it really difficult in the beginning and kidded myself that I didn't need to do it. But I have now realised that if I want to stay as healthy as possible and avoid serious hypos like the one that left me unconscious on an airplane and another where I didn't wake up in the morning, i need to record everything. Once you get in the habit it becomes second nature. I have bought a book with all of the letters of the alphabet like an address book I use this to record meals, how much carbohydrate and how much insulin is required. This means the next time I eat the same meal I don't have to weigh it and do all of the maths. I am now really focused and it is good when you recognise patterns and adjust accordingly. Good luck.x