Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed.

[Helenababe]

Hi everyone,

Over the years, from reading about, and listening to diabetics, and from my own experience, my feelings have got stronger and stronger about the lack of emotional and psychological support on first being diagnosed with diabetes.

I was sent away to 'get on with it'. I hardly had any dietary advice, and felt totally isolated, struggling to work out my diet, and at the same time, deal with the shock and devastation.
We should be offered counseling, of some kind, to help with the emotional side of things, which would then help us with the rest of it. Being able to talk with someone about how I felt, how it had affected me, my fears, sadness, and anger, etc,. would have helped me no end, and, it would have shown me that the medical profession were aware of, and appreciated the affect being a diabetic has on everyone.

When my GP told me the news, I burst into tears. He said: "What are you crying for...? You're not surprised are you?!"
And that was that!

You lose the person you used to be, and all of the medical people I've seen have been oblivious to what I'm going through inside.
The first thing though, which we 'are' all supposed to be entitled to, is say to any newly diagnosed, if they feel they need it, is to insist on seeing a dietition.
If our doctors and DNs realized the emotional turmoil diabetes can cause, perhaps we would all get treated better.

Helena.

 

[Snodger]

Re: Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed

YES. And also (based on what my mum told me about how lost she felt when I was diagnosed) in an ideal world carers should also get this help.

 

[SparkJack]

Re: Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed

Yes and x10 I agree with you.
I too was told that's you diabetic then, make an appointment to see the diabetic nurse on your way out.....
I was too stunned to discuss or say anything.

 

[Gappy]

Re: Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed

I'd agree, I guess I was lucky in that my mum is diabetic so I had my own counsellor on call. But even a long appointment so you can have a good discussion with a diabetic nurse could at least give you the opportunity to get knowledge and not be so scared.

 

[viv1969]

Re: Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed

I agree that counselling should be offered for those who require it; however I believe I was quite lucky when I was diagnosed. I didn't once feel as though I had "lost the person I used to be". I made it my business to do as much research as possible about the disease and tailor my lifestyle / treatment accordingly.

 

[anna29]

Re: Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed

Hi all.
On this subject - I personally totally AGREE it should be at the least 'offered' to the newly diagnosed as its a new life journey with a potentially serious condition. [ chose these words with tact ]
Counselling could help so many to start in a much clearer pathway amongst all the medical jargon and do's and dont's etc...
It can be a shock to some, takes time to adapt and adjust, things to settle and make sense.
Even the disbelief and anger needs channelling wisely too.
Given that some people are even 'stuck and numb with shock' can take weeks or even months to get heads around it all.
Counselling could be so beneficial helping to clear the cluttered and overwhelmed mind.
Enabling the newly diagnosed to feel more structured and reassurred too, so badly needed at the new diagnosis stage.
Simple basics steps - easy to follow - and implemented into the daily routine would be a great starting point. The counselllor giving just 2-3 things to the newly diagnosed to think about and write down, till the next session.
Making wonderful clearer sense to the initial confusion , fear and fog we all feel when newly diagnosed.
Seriously I really couldnt AGREE more with this thread.
Hope this helps?
Anna.x

 

[ebony321]

Re: Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed

Yes, very well said. I only was offered counselling after i stopped taking my insulin for so long that i was hospitalised 6 times in under a year. Which i believe could have been prevented if i had someone to talk to about how i was feeling after being diagnosed. Especially because my father died when i was 13 from neglecting his own diabetes. All i got time and time again was the 'you'll go blind' speech. Definately what i did not need. I needed to hear how people can cope and live normally with diabetes.

I also agree with carers, parents and partners being offered the same too. Diabetes going far beyond affecting who is diagnosed.

It's sad to think some doctors are so numb to tact and sympathy to make such hurtful remarks.

Even the oppurtunity for diabetes centre's to hold a weekly free to come along session, tea and coffee in a room where people can wander in to talk to others with diabetes. Sort of like a club. I would love the oppurtunity to meet with other people with diabetes and just be able to talk with people that understand. As loving as people are, not everyone can empathise in how hard it can be sometimes. All we would need is a room and a kettle

 

[starlight1]

Re: Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed

i agree 100% that councelling should be offered, i was diagnosed and left to get on with it. Thank goodness for this forum, I have learnt all i know about diabetes from here and i feel that there is help and understanding from the members of this forum that know one else has given me from the medical proffession. I am thinking of starting an support group for diabetics where people can meet and talk to each other where i live, because it doesnt look like we are going to get the help and support we all need from the medical front.

 

[ebony321]

Re: Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed

An excellent idea starlight. I've thought the same but live in a small town so i'm not sure if i could do it here. Good luck if you decide too, if your not too far away i'm sure people here including myself would come

 

[anna29]

Re: Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed

Hiya ebony,
Absolutely loved your reply and sooo true too.
I live in the north west lancashire, all we have up here is a monthly support group , every time I go to this the room is at full capacity to the point we need a larger room and new venue.
Once a month there and up at the clinic is the ONLY time I ever get chance to meet other diabetics .
I can hardly ask my own gp for other diabetics addresses living near me , turn up on their doorstep , tell them to pop the kettle on . :lol:
I too would love to chat to others near me in person and have some new diabetic [understanding] friends.
We must have over 50 persons at the monthly support meetings and each time more attend, so there is a clear and positive need for this.
In an ideal world all members on here could hook up in local areas and form new support groups. Then we wouldnt feel so isolated living with our diabetes.

 

[vicky36]

Re: Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed

I totally agree with u on this I have found that there hasn't been any support as t what I should b eating or avoiding n find it impossible t get my BS levels below 9.2 but thts first thing on a morning I hav had no help with this at all. Counselling would b extremely helpful with this n all other issues that go along when new t diabetes. I hav t hav an op which is very important t my everyday living but my hba1c has t ne down below 8 n end of July it was 9.5 all that was told take 4 metformin everyday n we'll retest u in 3mnths I hav cut all sorts out off my diet n swapped different items t thr wholemeal versions but still don't get lower daily BS levels o am so confused n down bout it n needing this op n wanting t get my life under control again but at the mo it seems impossible t do if counselling was part of care then I wouldn't feel on this black hole unable t get out wish there was a quick result or answer t this everyone needs this

 

[CollieBoy]

Re: Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed

Problem with diabetic peer support could be(I don't know as doesnt seem to be any here in Lancashire, close to G.Manc/Yorkshire border) that an over dominant "leadership" could lead newbies away from improvement by saying "you don't want to do THAT, it doesnt work (and leave off the important - FOR ME)" look at the Hi carb/ Lo Carb Hi fat / Lo fat spats that crop up on the 'net<G>

 

[anna29]

Re: Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed

Hi FergusCrawford.
Am sure there wouldnt be any over dominant leadership???
There certainly isnt anything like this at my local support group [held monthly]
It always has topic related talkers and prebooked speakers some who are volunteering their time free to come and support us all. [some are HCP'S too I might add]
It is always structured and organised extremely well, we do have an hour afterwards to mingle and interact with others.
We enjoy a cuppa and friendly chat, never ever any over dominant "leadership" leading any newbies away from improvement as you mentioned.
I am from Preston lancs and we certainly dont do this at our support group.
We stick on topic, remain adult caring supportive and respectful and friendly to each other.
Both thankful and grateful to have the 'chance' to meet others sharing the same journey.
You can PM me to discuss this further if you wish.
Anna.

 

[CollieBoy]

Re: Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed

Hi Anna, I was merely suggesting that this is something to be watched out for(and guided away from).
Sounds like you have a good group going over at Preston.
I 'm jealous!

 

[Snodger]

Re: Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed

In an ideal world all members on here could hook up in local areas and form new support groups. Then we wouldnt feel so isolated living with our diabetes.

is there a way of doing this without problems? Eg if we met in a public place, and used this forum to alert people?

 

[Helenababe]

Re: Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed

I'm pleased that some of you have diabetic meetings to go to.
'Because' there was no counselling, I became desperate to meet up with, and talk to other diabetics, so I looked for a group locally, but even though I live close to quite a large town, there was nothing. I was surprised, to say the least.

I totally agree that families should have counselling too. My family went through it all with me. They felt helpless, as they were even more in the dark about diabetes than I was.
Their support for me was wonderful, but I had to watch them suffer and worry, and, go through alot of fear.

One good thing happened though, about 6 months after I'd been diagnosed.
My son and daughter told me that the teachers had started to include diabetes in their courses at school.

My son said the first thing his teacher did was say: 'Hands up any of you who have a parent or relative who has diabetes.'
My son, naturally, being a young lad, said he felt uncomfortable because he thought he would be the only one to put his hand up, but he said he couldn't believe how many 'did'.
He said he relaxed then, and, which tugged on my heart strings, he said 'he' didn't feel so alone anymore.

After several lessons of discussing diabetes, he said it was really helping him to understand it more, and also they were able to openly talk to each other about what their parent/relative was going through, and also vent 'their' feelings, and how it had affected them.

A good thing.

Helena.

 

[ebony321]

Re: Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed

Hiya ebony,
Absolutely loved your reply and sooo true too.
I live in the north west lancashire, all we have up here is a monthly support group , every time I go to this the room is at full capacity to the point we need a larger room and new venue.
Once a month there and up at the clinic is the ONLY time I ever get chance to meet other diabetics .
I can hardly ask my own gp for other diabetics addresses living near me , turn up on their doorstep , tell them to pop the kettle on . :lol:
I too would love to chat to others near me in person and have some new diabetic [understanding] friends.
We must have over 50 persons at the monthly support meetings and each time more attend, so there is a clear and positive need for this.
In an ideal world all members on here could hook up in local areas and form new support groups. Then we wouldnt feel so isolated living with our diabetes.

Thats excellent! i might search see if there's one near where i live. I know there are support groups for other health problems such as fibromyalgia (my sister in law has it) there must be some sord of demand for it as diabetes is seeming to becoming more prominent.

Amongst a forum such as this it could be possible to set up a 'moving support group' moves from town to town and a member sort of volunteers to host it and then the rest travel to it. Theres alot of people here i would love to meet!

I also understand fergus' point too. seems like it does happen in your group though which is great!

I really would love to meet more people with diabetes. The search is on!

 

[anna29]

Re: Counseling should be part of the package, when diagnosed

In an ideal world all members on here could hook up in local areas and form new support groups. Then we wouldnt feel so isolated living with our diabetes.

is there a way of doing this without problems? Eg if we met in a public place, and used this forum to alert people?

Hi all,
This is achieveable and do'able but would need a safe structure and frameplan to place it in.
To prevent any unwanted harmful gatecrashing of the meetings.
If anyone wishes to discuss this further with me , feel free to PM me .
We living in north lancs are lucky enough to have a support group, and so many members there benefit from it.
There is clearly a need for more of these to be set up and running in forum members local towns .
Anna.