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Fast remedy for constipation in time for Christmas please!!!

One natural thing that I found works very effectively (for me, at least) is eating some kind of food rich in iron (such as spinach and egg) and drinking black coffee with it. Results in about an hour or two. I do not recommend adding an iron supplement as well!
 
If you don't see movocol or similar as an option,(I don't know any that taste nice) there are liquid from a tube suppositories that are very effective. just be aware there can be a lot of reasons for not having bowl movements, including a twisted bowl. Given you have pain, I would see a dr by now and especially if I throw up.
 
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Sounds interesting! I actually had a couple of large glasses of clementine juice and a fairly mild chilli (didn't want anything too explosive!) and it's started things moving. No more pain at least, and my stomach no longer feels rock hard.

My mum, who is 85 and hasn't done dinner for the last 6 or 7 years, has suddenly decided she wants to do Christmas dinner this year but dropped the bombshell today that there would be no brussels

Thanks everyone for all your suggestions and I'm also very mindful of the twisted bowel possibility as that's what my gran died of.
 
Right, so my shopping list today includes Movicol, Andrews, Milk of Magnesia, Epsom salts, cashew nuts, psyllium husks, ginger and docusate. And a stool. See you in the New Year.

Really though - Movicol comes in single sachets and the dosage for 'normal' constipation is 1 - 3 of these. For colonoscopy cleansing the dosage is something like 8. I've experienced this too! 1 to 3 are manageable if not quite actively unpleasant. ! Psyllium husks can be bought in many Pakistani grocers - look for Isbagol. I do use this but find it best sprinkled on food.
 
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