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Help?

Domi0205

Well-Known Member
Messages
59
So I was diagnosed with diabetes t1 since September last year. In January of this year I've stopped taking insulin and to be honest I only take it from time to time because I want to loose weight and seems like this is the best option to do it.
But I know it's not safe and I know this basically kills me inside but I don't know what to do anymore.
Since I was a child I had it coded that I'm fat and to this day this thing is still there that though in my head.
Im lost
 
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You have done the right thing to ask for help.
Not taking your insulin is dangerous but I understand you know this.
There is an organisation called Diabetics With Eating Disorders (DWED). DWED is the only current charity in the United Kingdom that supports and advocates for people that struggle with both type 1 diabetes and any kind of eating disorder.
I recommend contacting them. Their website is http://dwed.org.uk/
 
Is it a eating disorder???
I eat normally
 
I did exactly that and it almost killed me. I ended up in DKA in intensive care with the highest level of blood glucose of a surviving patient on record at my local hospital. It’s classed as an eating disorder because you’re not taking the proper medication to allow you to process your food normally in order to lose weight, it’s called diabulimia.

Put bluntly, is it better to be dead or seriously damaged than fat? You have a lot more to offer the world than a smaller body size xxx
 
Well for a teenage girl being skinny and pretty is a lot
 
The body converts excess glucose in the blood to fat using insulin. Perhaps if you eased off the carbs, you could reduce your insulin input, and you could start metabolising fat? But if your BMI and weight are OK, then trying to lose weight might not be useful to you? In all cases please discuss with your hcp. Sorry you are feeling like this at the moment and hope you can see your worth as a person, whatever your size, soon.
 
Domi0205 said:
Well for a teenage girl being skinny and pretty is a lot
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But I was once a teenager, I was bullied everyday at school and from year 7-11 I was in hospital for DKA for not taking insulin. In fear of being fat and I was overweight. DKA almost killed me as well and I understand there is a lot of peer pressure and social medias that put a huge emphasis on appearance. Weight started to come off when I was 15 on the bolus-basal regime and looking after myself. Going through DKA to lose weight isn't something I'd do again. 10 years on I never felt better and I do intuitive eating which is the opposite of a diet but I maintained my current weight and I'm very happy because I don't feel guilty for eating a few biscuits. Diabetes doesn't bite back when you look after it, it'll bite back harder if you don't and I would never ever put my family through it again. My parents had businesses and my youngest brother to look after and they had to give up their businesses because I was in hospital for DKA several times. If I'm honest, it wasn't worth the torture for my body and my family, I didn't lose any weight, but it caused a lot of infections. I put on weight after DKA tbf. I didn't get the help back then, diabulimia wasn't recognised during my time at the hospital. For a young female like you, there is help available and therapy tailored towards patients with long term health conditions. So please speak to your GP or diabetes teams about it.

This has nothing to do with diabetes but there was a study or experiment? I think? of an artist who drew a portrait with all the features men that find pretty in a female and the portrait turned out to be the most unattractive piece of work. Flaws makes us unique, right?

I did DAFNE in November 2018 and there was a mature woman said her weight started to come off when she took the right amount of insulin for that amount of carbs. So there are better ways to lose weight, but I doubt you need to lose weight because scales is just a number, it doesn't measure your fat to muscle ratio because muscle weighs more than fat. There are people who are heavy because of their muscles but the scales and the BMI says he or she is fat when they're not fat.

I'll say it for the millionth time - through time and education, being skinny mini isn't all that, you do you. you exercise, you eat well, take medication as advised, you sleep well and look after yourself and beauty shows through. ( I know females my age that do that and their skin is amazing, no makeup what so ever)
 
Thanks a lot
 
Domi0205 said:
Well for a teenage girl being skinny and pretty is a lot
Click to expand...
Been there. Now I look back and realize how beautiful I was when I was your age but of course at the time I didn't think so. Have you tried reducing carbs or the keto diet? If you did, you would require way less insulin, lose weight and be healthy. Beauty ultimately is an expression of health. Thin can also mean sickness and be ugly. You owe it to the future you to take good care of yourself. Learn as much as you can. Be creative and expand your mind beyond the poisonous propaganda our society is always seeking to delude us with. Best wishes.
 
I eat stuff that has bearly any carbs
 
Domi0205 said:
I eat stuff that has bearly any carbs
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Do you measure your blood sugar? I just can't buy that it's insulin that makes a person put on or keep on fat. I really don't care how many experts say so. You need insulin. In my opinion, it's the whole body/health thing that makes someone overweight. Ultimately, in my opinion, it comes down to food and movement as well as insulin and the whole body metabolic thing. If your best friend was type 1 and thought she was fat when the scales were saying she's thin, what would you say if she wouldn't take her insulin?
 
Well i don't measure to not get scared of the results
 
@Domi0205 - I'm not a T1, so have no experience of using insulin to share. However, I have done a lot of reading, and as a former anorexic, I do understand the body battles our mind puts us through when it comes to body shape, weight or whatever it is that drives you.

My understanding of insulin is it will only cause weight gain where the balance between insulin taken and food eaten isn't well matched. An exception can be when recovering from DKA, due to the body's natural need to recover a healtheier state.

Four months is a very long time indeed to not have taken insulin. Do you take any at all, like your long acting, and "just" skip the short acting, or do you ignore the whole thing?

I don't want to talk specific numbers with you, but it is important that you seek help for this, but also that you try to make a pact with yourself to start doing at least one thing to improve your health.

I don't know what ranges your clinic expect you to work within, but if you aren't taking insulin, I imagine those numbers and what your meter would say aren't going to be in anyway similar. I think sometimes in those circumstances, it seems like a massive hill to climb to move from where we find ourselves now, to where we really should be for a healthier life, so don't set that as an immediate goal.

How about setting a goal to start testing, at least once a day, and injecting your insulin more regularly. Then, scary though it may be, you will know your situation, but more importantly, when taking your insulin, and seeing the numbers coming down a bit, you will have successes to log and celebrate (even if it's inwardly). Positive successes are important.

Do you talk to your folks about this, and if so, what do they say? Are they concerned about you, or do you hide this from them too? Eating disorders can turn us into sneaky people. I know.

Domi0205 - There are plenty prople out there who will try to help you, and by coming on here and posting, it shows you recognise where you are and what you're doing isn't the best way forward. Build on that.

I know my eating disorder was very different to yours, but I got myself to death's door (literally) before I didn't anything about it. Stubborn? Me? You bet your life. I was ill enough that my parents flew out to say goodbye to me (I was living overseas at the time).

I don't say any of this to say "I was more ill than you, so there!), but more to help you understand that your position isn't hopeless. You can get better and you can go on to build a successful, productive life for yourself, the the challenge and the answer is in the first step.

Really, really good luck with it all. You deserve a much better life than the one you are currently walking towards.
 

Hey there

Your post struck a chord with me. I was 17 when I was diagnosed and hated it, hated what it did to me, the box it put me into, I did not want to accept it at all, I then by chance realised that if I didn’t inject my insulin I would lose weight.. which I felt for me some positive attention when in the past I had been overlooked by my peers and especially men.

I carried on doing this for about 5 years, I didn’t feel like I could stop, sometimes I wanted to , most of the time I didn’t. The need to be skinny and look good was much greater than the need to look after my diabetes.

It’s a long story but I eventually got my act together and took the reigns and controlled my diabetes rather than let it control me. And my lovely that’s what you need to do, reach out and grab those reigns. Hey, it won’t be easy, there will be times you hear that voice telling you to stop injecting and lose a few pounds to fit into that dress but take it from a diabulimia survivor, the feeling of being in some control and living your best life is more eutrophic than any pound lost.

Unfortunately years of abusing my diabetes has left me with complications, you don’t ever think it will happen to you but trust me - it does and it will. I urge you to reach out, I’m only a direct message away, I’m more than happy to help you on your journey.

You got this.


Becca
Xo
 
Hi @Domi0205, Please, please, please seek help.
Contact the people who have expertise in your type of troubles as @helensaramay suggests.
Sometimes people carry about with them a belief that they are overweight when in fact they are, when their weight, height etc is measured.
And whilst an ostrich hides its head as a form of defence, hiding from measuring bsls helps no-one, particularly yourself.
That is why seeing thise who understand what is happening to you is so important.
There is a way to be and feel much better but you will need to take that step, or end up back in hospital or maybe even detained.
You have a scary choice but it is far better in the long run to go towards the light, get better and learn from the past and embrace the present and future.
Your bsls and their control over the next few years are very important and you really have a great chance at a wonderful life.
I say that having been on insulin for 52 years. Not saying it is easy street but doable.
Each if us has potential to be the best we can, to blossom, achieve things and care about ourselves and those we love.
It can hard to love ourselves at times and humour is a good way to atsrt, but we all need to be realistic, accept feedback and keep our minds clear about what is real.
Best Wishes.

Nothing is impossible
 
Thank you so much I do really appreciate your help
 
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