• Guest - w'd love to know what you think about the forum! Take the 2025 Survey »

Partner of Type 1 diabetic looking to talk with others

L

Lady Dada

Newbie
Messages
3
Hi,

I am brand new to the forum. I have signed up because I am trying to find people in my situation (my husband is Type 1) that I can talk to re caring for a partner. Dealing with hypos can be tough (as I'm sure you all know). I've always seen helping my husband when he needs it it as just 'part of the job', but emotionally it can take it's toll and I don't know anyone else with a diabetic partner. Sometimes I really need someone to talk to!

If there's anyone out there, in my situation, who understands where I'm coming from I'd love to hear from you.
 
Hi, I'm in my late thirties and so is my husband who has been type 1 since the age of 14. We also have 3 children of which sadly 2 are also type 1. My husband is very well controlled and does have hypo's although these are mainly mild. He carb counts and tests frequently to avoid dropping too low and is also able to compensate for any highs.
I have had to intervene on 2 occasions, once at night ( although this was some time ago when he was on a different insulin to the one he's on now). At the time I used glycogen and within a few mins he was 'bAck in the room'. The other time was shortly after the kids were diagnosed and he was under so much stress. I have to admit this was extremely upsetting and my kids witnessed it as well which made it worse.

When is sugar is on the low side say low 4's / high 3's, he does get a bit irritable and stubborn, and since this is not his usual demeanour I can sometimes recognise he's a little low before he does.

At times it is hard worrying about him and the kids, but since I manage my children it makes me appreciate how hard it can be to control and even when you've done everything possible you can still get readings outside your target range.

If you have any specific questions then feel free to PM me. Leggott.
 
Welcome to the forum Lady Dada!

Nigel
 
Thanks so much for the reply Legott,

I'm also in my late (ish) 30's, my husband early 40's (diagnosed age 11). My husband controls his levels well, on the whole and much better than he used to, so the hypos are less frequent than they used to be. Nevertheless, i have had to deal with more than i can count over the past 6 or so years! The nightime ones (where he becomes physically 'floppy' as i have always described it and sweats buckets) are easy to spot and, if caught fairly quickly have become a run of the mill chocolate feed and perhaps sheet change etc. and back to bed once i know his levels are suitable. What i am finding most distressing, and oddly harder to deal with rather than easier, are the waking hypos where his altered mental state that also comes with nightime hypos is more obvious, leading to his confusion, refusal of sugar in whatever form i attempt to give him (because he doesn't undertsand what is going on) and sometimes violence - not directed at me (he is most definitley NOT a violent man!) but in a lashing out wildly.

Once he is 'back in the room' he is always very apologetic, assuring me he blood tested and regulated his insulin etc. and it is clear he feels for me having to help him. my automatic response is 'no need to apologise darling - it's not your fault'. I can't express to him how i'm really feeling as he feels so bad and it really isn't his fault, i absolutely won't make him feel guilty - but i have no other outlet for my emotions so they get bottled up. i don't like to talk about him behind his back and i know no one else in my situation so just keep on dealing with it silently. i wish i could express to someone just how frightened i get, there and then, if you see what i mean.

sorry to ramble on, i don't mean to sound sorry for myself or anything like that. it just feels so good to be able to express myself to an appropriate person who understands, so thank you so much for responding to my post.

(as a point of note the major hypos are normally around 1.5 on the occaisions where i can test his levels before dealing with the hypo - not a good place for him to be).

Also, i hope yr children are doing well. You must be a very strong person!
 
Hi, I totally understand how you feel. The refusal to eat or test when asked is I think quite common. My husband says it's all a bit confusing when he's low and a bit of a denial thing. I have been on the receiving end of that a few times and yes, it is upsetting and also worrying. There are many times when I think he may be low ( when in fact he isn't) and he won't test because he is ok and know's it.

I agree with not burdening him with this, but you can explAin the situation to him so he is aware of what happens when he is low. You're not asking for an apology, just expressing how you feel and I don't see any harm in that.

Hopefully now you have discovered this site you will find many people who can share their experiences with you and also provide you with a shoulder to cry on when you need it. leggott.
 
Lady Dada - a very warm welcome to the forum. As you can see someone always comes to talk to you when you need it.
 
oops - not used to forums - just lost my last post before posting it!

essentially it was a big thank you to Legott, i am feeling better already just to hear familiar stories and for the first time ever talk to someone who understands what my husband and i live with, your words are very much appreciated.

also thank you to Nigel and Daisy for their welcomes - i am so glad i found this forum! (may take a while to get used to using it though!)
 
Hi again. I'm pleased to have helped in anyway I can. I'm a firm believer in ' a problem shared is a problem halved'.

I find this site invaluable and it has really helped me through extremely difficult times. If ever I'm feeling down or fed up I log on immediately as I know there will always be someone who understands how I feel and can offer some advice. Just that feeling of knowing there are other people out there who have had the same experiences can be very comforting. leggott.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Menu
Log in
Register
Cookies are required to use this site. You must accept them to continue using the site. Learn More.…