Hi
@jo789, sorry you’re struggling at the moment! It’s pants when the ‘can’t get it right’ hits - it makes all of us feel we’re fighting a losing battle and are utterly useless. You’re not alone in this, many of us have been there one time or another. The real bonus (ironic) is that running too high makes us feel even worse.
Can you ask your GP to refer you to a teaching hospital for some expert help? They could investigate whether there’s anything else that would help your levels, and whether there’s anything in particular that’s led to your high doses. Have you always needed a lot of insulin?
Your workplace should accommodate any appointments you need under the Equality Act so don’t feel you need to wait or take holiday time.
Sitting at a desk all day, as you say, is not the best for a T1, is there anything you could do to get more exercise? A brisk walk on the way to and from work might make a big diffference, even if you drive there and go round a couple of blocks before you go through the door. I find exercise is a mood lifter too.
Three years isn’t long. You’re young, no complications, and despite the dire warnings that DSNs seem to have on a loop these days you’re more likely to have a long and healthy life than fall prey to any of the dreaded ‘the end of the world is nigh’ stuff that they keep banging on about. Some of us have had T1 for decades, getting it before the development of portable blood testing kit and sophisticated insulins.
Don’t despair.
When I had a dark time recently, before switching insulins, the best advice I was given was to take a week off from frequent testing and worrying and relax. Try it? Get a good book and lose yourself in it. See a happy film. Have a laugh with friends. And put T1 in the background for a few days?
Have a virtual hug from me too - you’re about the same age as my daughters, so have a proxy mummy hug