My Wife Refuses Insulin

[Cant_help_her]

Hi, can I take it back a step? Does your wife test her blood sugars? And how is she with her diet and meds? I suppose I'm trying to work out what she is frightened of, the diabetes, the needles or even of dying. I must admit it sounds to me like a very frightened lady and personally I'm not sure the scare tactics would help at the moment. Does she know you have come to the forum? Would she be prepared to join herself? Sorry for all the questions! Sue x

, No problem As for the blood sugars she stopped testing them years ago but when she goes to the hospital they do and they cant figure out how she functions at all ...its the weight gain that's the problem. when she did try it years ago she gained a lot in a very short time and cant wrap her own head around it ....we tried to get her help for that but it didn't work and she wont go back. That's what scares me is that she isn't afraid. She says she doesn't want to die but isn't afraid to . I told her I joined this site but she is stubborn

 

[Cant_help_her]

Sadly, she probably feels worse because her bloods aren't under control, but those are semantics a this point.

Does she take any other medication, as well as the Metformin? For example, many people take both Metformin and Gliclazide together?

metformin and forxiga

 

[ButtterflyLady]

Hi there, sorry to hear you and your family are going through this. While insulin would be the obvious choice in her situation, there are many types of pills available that do more than metformin does, and there are injections she could take once a week or once a day that aren't insulin. Also, changing what she eats can help too. It is possible to take insulin without gaining weight but it sounds like she wouldn't be open to finding out about that at this time.

She needs to take care of her feet and wear socks and comfortable shoes or slippers at all times except in bed or showering, to reduce the risk of cuts, grazes and blisters that can break the skin and allow bacteria to enter. And her feet should be checked every day.

 

[Cant_help_her]

Hi there, sorry to hear you and your family are going through this. While insulin would be the obvious choice in her situation, there are many types of pills available that do more than metformin does, and there are injections she could take once a week or once a day that aren't insulin. Also, changing what she eats can help too. It is possible to take insulin without gaining weight but it sounds like she wouldn't be open to finding out about that at this time.

She needs to take care of her feet and wear socks and comfortable shoes or slippers at all times except in bed or showering, to reduce the risk of cuts, grazes and blisters that can break the skin and allow bacteria to enter. And her feet should be checked every day.

I wish she was open to anything . At this point they just want to slow down what its doing to her . We have the diabetic socks and slippers thanks....I guess its me who is trying to wrap his head around this.

 

[mrspuddleduck]

Sounds like there's lots of different stuff going on at once for her. Give her a message from me - I'm on insulin, am 5'7" and 8 stone so its not automatic that you put on the weight!!!! Seriously, I agree with @CatLadyNZ, the immediate thing is that she looks after her feet. Is she usually active or is the diabetes getting in the way? If she is active perhaps she believes she is doing enough to keep it at bay?
I would suggest that you put the 'treatment' stuff on temporary hold and try and concentrate on persuading her to start testing again. It's so easy to ignore what's happening to yourself because of fear, stubbornness - we are all guilty of that to some degree, and perhaps she feels she's 'survived' her diabetes for so long it's not going to change now?? At least if she started testing she could prove to you (and herself) that her diabetes is as controlled as she is trying to believe it is! Hopefully if she sees her bloods are high then she may be willing to make small changes to begin to get it under control.
It is a bit of a viscious circle, she won't look after herself, so you get upset, so she responds by not looking after herself. Much easier than sorting the problem out and facing what she probably doesn't want to face. And don't forget, if she has high prolonged blood sugars its very likely causing depression and making her feel angry or emotional! Sue xx

 

[AndBreathe]

metformin and forxiga

There are many, many oral drugs and combinations of drugs available.

As your wife is so unwell, if you believe she's really afraid of injecting herself, if might be possible for a district nurse to do some of her injections. If it isn't the injecting, then there are some injection based (injecting once every few days) medications that might be helpful to her.

If your wofe is afraid of gaining weight on insulin, then unfortunately some people do. Not everyone does, but some do gain weight, unless they modify what and/or how they eat and drink.

Does she test her bloods, using the finger prick method?

When she has been in hospital, has she ever been put on a drip, which includes insulin to bring her numbers down? If so, how did she feel on the insulin?

 

[Daibell]

Hi and welcome. One obvious question is what sort of diet does your wife have? As she has excess weight I suspect she is eating too many carbs and if she has depression it may be dificult to reduce this unless she wants to. Metformin doesn't normally cause increased weight but the opposite. Insulin only causes weight gain if you have too many carbs (it's not the insulin) and doesn't work so well anyway with excess weight due to insulin resistance. Do focus on reducing the carbs if you can get the wife to go along with that. I've heard of good results with forxiga.

 

[Cant_help_her]

Sounds like there's lots of different stuff going on at once for her. Give her a message from me - I'm on insulin, am 5'7" and 8 stone so its not automatic that you put on the weight!!!! Seriously, I agree with @CatLadyNZ, the immediate thing is that she looks after her feet. Is she usually active or is the diabetes getting in the way? If she is active perhaps she believes she is doing enough to keep it at bay?
I would suggest that you put the 'treatment' stuff on temporary hold and try and concentrate on persuading her to start testing again. It's so easy to ignore what's happening to yourself because of fear, stubbornness - we are all guilty of that to some degree, and perhaps she feels she's 'survived' her diabetes for so long it's not going to change now?? At least if she started testing she could prove to you (and herself) that her diabetes is as controlled as she is trying to believe it is! Hopefully if she sees her bloods are high then she may be willing to make small changes to begin to get it under control. She knows she is in big trouble believe me I can see it in hr face . Just asked her if she would take her blood levels and it was no ....I know 5'7' but I'm Canadian and I'm sorry but I don't know 8 stone ....I am however going to ask if I can go into her next internal medical appointment without her permission or if they will tell me whats going on inside and what else I can do

 

[ButtterflyLady]

Do you know why she said no to blood testing? Does she allow blood testing that the doctor requests? My understanding is that you can only go to her appointments or be told information if she agrees. If she refuses both things then we can discuss what other options you might have.

 

[mrspuddleduck]

Sorry 8stone is about 50.8kg! Are you reading her these replies?? Sue xx

 

[Molly56]

@Cant_help_her ....just wanted to say hello and that I know what it is like to deal with a stubborn type 2 diabetic (I have one of my own)...so can relate totally to your fears and frustrations...
..my partner of six years has been diabetic for probably 15 - 20 years and did nothing to control it other than just pop the pills prescribed...he always maintained he would never go on insulin but the crunch came earlier this year and he started on insulin in February...he does now take his insulin as required but there are many other factors that are problematic in his management of his diabetes which I do continue to worry about...

...he is also on metformin and more recently on forxiga...this was prescribed to help him lose weight as he was previously on gliclazide and that in combination with the insulin had led to weight gain (he was already overweight to begin with)....he has lost a few pounds since starting on the forxiga so at least this is now heading in the right direction all be it slowly...
....just wondered if the fact that your wife is already on the forxiga would counteract any potential weight gain from going on to insulin....it seems it is a fine balancing act but perhaps this will dispel her fears.....has she lost weight since starting on the forxiga...

..as for injections I thought my partner was avoiding the insulin for the reason of not wanting to inject but has seemed to have taken to it like a duck to water...I sometimes question (in my head / not out loud to him) his injection technique and how he blindly injects without testing his bs levels but at least he is doing it...

Hope you manage to find some useful answers and advice and can find some way of getting your wife to take more care of herself and her diabetes....I know how hard it can be on the outside trying to help someone who it appears doesn't want to help themselves...others on here will probably vouch for that..
.....someone on here once told me you need to take baby steps...just one small step at a time and hopefully you will get there..

 

[Cant_help_her]

Hi and welcome. One obvious question is what sort of diet does your wife have? As she has excess weight I suspect she is eating too many carbs and if she has depression it may be dificult to reduce this unless she wants to. Metformin doesn't normally cause increased weight but the opposite. Insulin only causes weight gain if you have too many carbs (it's not the insulin) and doesn't work so well anyway with excess weight due to insulin resistance. Do focus on reducing the carbs if you can get the wife to go along with that. I've heard of good results with forxiga.

Thank you ..The forxiga started to work within a couple weeks and he energy levels got better...she tried walking without a cane but she has bad balance....she broke her toenail and spend 4 days with an IV for antibiotics and has since lost that energy we were seeing . Her diet is terrible and always has been and that's not going to change. She isn't the person she was and I cant reach the person she is now

 

[Cant_help_her]

@Cant_help_her ....just wanted to say hello and that I know what it is like to deal with a stubborn type 2 diabetic (I have one of my own)...so can relate totally to your fears and frustrations...
..my partner of six years has been diabetic for probably 15 - 20 years and did nothing to control it other than just pop the pills prescribed...he always maintained he would never go on insulin but the crunch came earlier this year and he started on insulin in February...he does now take his insulin as required but there are many other factors that are problematic in his management of his diabetes which I do continue to worry about...

...he is also on metformin and more recently on forxiga...this was prescribed to help him lose weight as he was previously on gliclazide and that in combination with the insulin had led to weight gain (he was already overweight to begin with)....he has lost a few pounds since starting on the forxiga so at least this is now heading in the right direction all be it slowly...
....just wondered if the fact that your wife is already on the forxiga would counteract any potential weight gain from going on to insulin....it seems it is a fine balancing act but perhaps this will dispel her fears.....has she lost weight since starting on the forxiga...

..as for injections I thought my partner was avoiding the insulin for the reason of not wanting to inject but has seemed to have taken to it like a duck to water...I sometimes question (in my head / not out loud to him) his injection technique and how he blindly injects without testing his bs levels but at least he is doing it...

Hope you manage to find some useful answers and advice and can find some way of getting your wife to take more care of herself and her diabetes....I know how hard it can be on the outside trying to help someone who it appears doesn't want to help themselves...others on here will probably vouch for that..
.....someone on here once told me you need to take baby steps...just one small step at a time and hopefully you will get there..

Thank you so much ....I am going to read this to her

 

[Cant_help_her]

Sorry 8stone is about 50.8kg! Are you reading her these replies?? Sue xx

my first time ever posting anywhere and I'm trying to look at all the replies sry everyone I am trying my best

 

[Cant_help_her]

Sorry 8stone is about 50.8kg! Are you reading her these replies?? Sue xx

I know that measure lol ...tiny I will tell her that too Thank you

 

[Cant_help_her]

Do you know why she said no to blood testing? Does she allow blood testing that the doctor requests? My understanding is that you can only go to her appointments or be told information if she agrees. If she refuses both things then we can discuss what other options you might have.

I know the answer is no ...already tried 50 times ...she says no to testing because she knows they are high so here optimal is 5.5 - 7.5, hers have been as high as 28 for long periods of time and have even crested 30 the meter we had then only went to 30. most people would have been passed out or in a coma and have no idea why she wasn't, At the hospital 10 days ago they were 21

 

[mrspuddleduck]

my first time ever posting anywhere and I'm trying to look at all the replies sry everyone I am trying my best

You're doing amazingly well! Give her a message - tell her we do understand, we've all been there at one stage or another, and we are not all mad fit perfect diabetics! Tell her we don't judge, just share our experiences and try and help each other out. So if she ever wants to ask anything, however small or silly, however off the wall, we are around for her. And give her a cyber hug from me cos I'm a stubborn old bag too!!! Xx

 

[Cant_help_her]

You're doing amazingly well! Give her a message - tell her we do understand, we've all been there at one stage or another, and we are not all mad fit perfect diabetics! Tell her we don't judge, just share our experiences and try and help each other out. So if she ever wants to ask anything, however small or silly, however off the wall, we are around for her. And give her a cyber hug from me cos I'm a stubborn old bag too!!! Xx

Your awesome ...Thank you I will

 

[Enclave]

I have a wife who will not 'do' doctors ..thankfully she is in good health, and not diabetic ..but I know if she needed any non emergency treatment (She has had broken bones fixed) she would refuse treatment. She is quite strong and is active in anti vivisection campaigns .. and this the reason she avoids any medication, or any products that are tested on animals.

On the other hand she sorts out my many medications for my heart failure .. so is not enforcing her way of thinking on me.

My point is ... I have to support and respect her decision .. yes if anything should happen to her I will find it desperately hard to support her decision. At the end of the day its her body ..

Try to support your wife's decision .. who knows maybe if she sees your supporting her in this she may change her mind and take the medication

Hope this helps to give you a different perspective on her actions

 

[Totto]

What does she eat? Diet can make a huge difference.

Have a look at this http://www.dietdoctor.com/lchf