911

Pura Vida

Well-Known Member
Messages
746
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Tablets (oral)
Dispatcher:9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown house on the corner.
Dispatcher:
Do you have an address?
Caller:
No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?


Dispatcher
: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller
: Someone broke into my house and took a bite out of my ham and cheese sandwich .
Dispatcher
: Excuse me?
Caller
: I made a ham and cheese sandwich and left it on the kitchen table and when I came
back from the bathroom, someone had taken a bite out of it.
Dispatcher
: Was anything else taken?
Caller
: No, but this has happened to me before and I'm sick and tired of it!


Dispatcher:9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?
Caller: I'm trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn't have an eleven on it.
Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.
Caller: I thought you just said it was nine-one-one
Dispatcher: Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing.
Caller: Honey, I may be old, but I'm not stupid.
A Personal Favorite!!!
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What's the nature of your emergency?
Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart
Dispatcher: Is this her first child?
Caller: No, you idiot! This is her husband!

And the winner is...
Dispatcher: 9-1-1
Caller: Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing. I'm all out of breath. Darn...I think I'm going to pass out.
Dispatcher: Sir, where are you calling from?
Caller: I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster.
Dispatcher: Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic?
Caller: No, I'm a Methodist
Dispatcher: What were you doing before you started having trouble breathing?
Caller: Running from the Police.