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<blockquote data-quote="Pura Vida" data-source="post: 2210094" data-attributes="member: 131793"><p><strong>Questions and Answers from </strong></p><p></p><p><strong>Retired People</strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>Q:</em></strong> <strong>Where can single men over the age of 70 find </strong></p><p><strong><strong>younger women who are interested in them?</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>A:</em></strong> <strong>Try a bookstore, under </strong></p><p><strong><strong>Fiction.</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>Q:</em></strong> <strong>What can a man do while his wife is going </strong></p><p>Through<strong>menopause?</strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>A:</em></strong> <strong>Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can </strong></p><p><strong><strong>finish the basement. When you're done, you will have a place to </strong></strong></p><p><strong><strong>live.</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>Q:</em></strong> <strong>Someone has told me that menopause is </strong></p><p><strong><strong>mentioned in the bible. </strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong>Is that true? </strong></p><p><strong><strong>Where can it be </strong></strong></p><p><strong><strong>found?</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>A:</em></strong> <strong>Yes. Matthew 14:92: </strong></p><p><strong><strong>"And Mary rode </strong></strong></p><p><strong><strong>Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt"</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>Q:</em></strong> <strong>How can you increase the heart rate of your </strong></p><p><strong><strong>over-70 year-old husband?</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>A:</em></strong> <strong>Tell him you're </strong></p><p><strong><strong>pregnant.</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>Q:</em></strong> <strong>How can you avoid that terrible curse of the </strong></p><p><strong><strong>elderly wrinkles?</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>A:</em></strong> <strong>Take off your </strong></p><p><strong><strong>glasses.</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>Q:</em></strong> <strong>Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet </strong></p><p><strong><strong>and all those wrinkles on my face?</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>A:</em></strong> <strong>Go bra less. It will usually pull them </strong></p><p><strong><strong>out!</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>Q:</em></strong> <strong>Why should 70-plus year old people use valet </strong></p><p><strong><strong>parking?</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>A:</em></strong> <strong>Valets don't forget where they park your </strong></p><p><strong><strong>car.</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>Q:</em></strong> <strong>Is it common for 70-plus year olds to have </strong></p><p><strong><strong>problems with short term memory storage?</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>A:</em></strong> <strong>Storing memory is not a problem. Retrieving it </strong></p><p><strong><strong>is the problem.</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>Q:</em></strong> <strong>As people age, do they sleep more soundly?</strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>A:</em></strong> <strong>Yes, but usually in the </strong></p><p><strong><strong>afternoon.</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>Q:</em></strong> <strong>Where should 70-plus year olds look for eye </strong></p><p><strong><strong>glasses?</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>A:</em></strong> <strong>On their </strong></p><p><strong><strong>foreheads.</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>Q:</em></strong> <strong>What is the most common remark made by 70-plus </strong></p><p><strong><strong>year olds when they enter antique stores?</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong><em>A:</em></strong> <strong>"Gosh, I remember </strong></p><p><strong><strong>these!"</strong></strong></p><p></p><p><strong>SMILE, </strong></p><p><strong><strong>You've Still Got Your Sense Of </strong></strong></p><p><strong><strong>Humor, Haven't You?</strong></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p> </p><p></p><p></p><p> </p><p><strong>"To one who has faith, no explanation is necessary. To one without faith, no explanation is possible."</strong></p><p></p><p>--St. Thomas Aquinas</p><p></p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p> <strong>"Indeed I tremble for my country when I reflect that God is just: that his justice cannot sleep for ever." --Thomas Jefferson, Notes on the State of Virginia, Query 18, 1781</strong></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Pura Vida, post: 2210094, member: 131793"] [B]Questions and Answers from [/B] [B]Retired People[/B] [B][I]Q:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]Where can single men over the age of 70 find [B]younger women who are interested in them?[/B][/B] [B][I]A:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]Try a bookstore, under [B]Fiction.[/B][/B] [B][I]Q:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]What can a man do while his wife is going [/B] Through[B]menopause?[/B] [B][I]A:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can [B]finish the basement. When you're done, you will have a place to [/B] [B]live.[/B][/B] [B][I]Q:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]Someone has told me that menopause is [B]mentioned in the bible. [/B][/B] [B]Is that true? [B]Where can it be [/B] [B]found?[/B][/B] [B][I]A:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]Yes. Matthew 14:92: [B]"And Mary rode [/B] [B]Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt"[/B][/B] [B][I]Q:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]How can you increase the heart rate of your [B]over-70 year-old husband?[/B][/B] [B][I]A:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]Tell him you're [B]pregnant.[/B][/B] [B][I]Q:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]How can you avoid that terrible curse of the [B]elderly wrinkles?[/B][/B] [B][I]A:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]Take off your [B]glasses.[/B][/B] [B][I]Q:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet [B]and all those wrinkles on my face?[/B][/B] [B][I]A:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]Go bra less. It will usually pull them [B]out![/B][/B] [B][I]Q:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]Why should 70-plus year old people use valet [B]parking?[/B][/B] [B][I]A:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]Valets don't forget where they park your [B]car.[/B][/B] [B][I]Q:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]Is it common for 70-plus year olds to have [B]problems with short term memory storage?[/B][/B] [B][I]A:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]Storing memory is not a problem. Retrieving it [B]is the problem.[/B][/B] [B][I]Q:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]As people age, do they sleep more soundly?[/B] [B][I]A:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]Yes, but usually in the [B]afternoon.[/B][/B] [B][I]Q:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]Where should 70-plus year olds look for eye [B]glasses?[/B][/B] [B][I]A:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]On their [B]foreheads.[/B][/B] [B][I]Q:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]What is the most common remark made by 70-plus [B]year olds when they enter antique stores?[/B][/B] [B][I]A:[/I][/B] [B] [/B] [B]"Gosh, I remember [B]these!"[/B][/B] [B]SMILE, [B]You've Still Got Your Sense Of [/B] [B]Humor, Haven't You?[/B][/B] [B]"To one who has faith, no explanation is necessary. To one without faith, no explanation is possible."[/B] --St. Thomas Aquinas [B]"Indeed I tremble for my country when I reflect that God is just: that his justice cannot sleep for ever." --Thomas Jefferson, Notes on the State of Virginia, Query 18, 1781[/B] [/QUOTE]
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