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Jokes and Humour
The Affluence of Incohol
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<blockquote data-quote="Robinredbreast" data-source="post: 567698" data-attributes="member: 44643"><p>I had eighteen bottles of Whisky and was told by my wife to empty the contents down the sink or else!</p><p></p><p>I said I would proceed with this unpleasant task.</p><p></p><p>I withdrew the cork from the first bottle and poured it down the sink with the exception of one glass which I drank.</p><p></p><p>I withdrew the cork from the second bottle and did likewise, with the exception of 1 glass which I drank.</p><p></p><p>I extracted the cork from the third bottle and poured the glass down the sink, which I drank.</p><p></p><p>I pulled the cork from the fourth bottle down the sink and poured the bottle down the glass which I drank.</p><p></p><p>I pulled the bottle from the cork of the next and drank sink out of it and threw the rest down the glass which I drank.</p><p></p><p>I pulled the sink out of the next glass and poured the cork down the bottle.</p><p></p><p>Then I corked the sink out of the next glass and poured the cork down the bottle.</p><p></p><p>Then I corked the sink with the glass, bottled the sink and drank the pour.</p><p></p><p>When I had everything emptied I steadied the house with one hand, counted the glasses, corks, bottles and sinks with the other, which was 29 and as the house came by I counted them again.</p><p></p><p>Finally I had the house in one bottle, which I drank.</p><p></p><p>I'm not half as think as you might drunk. I am. I fool so feelish. I don't is me, and the drunker I stand here the longer I get.</p><p></p><p>I'm not under the affluence of incohol as tinkle peep I am.</p><p></p><p></p><p><em>This was found loose inside a book obtained via a local charity shop with no attribution as to the author<img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite40" alt=":hungover:" title="Hungover :hungover:" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":hungover:" /></em></p><p><img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite8" alt=":D" title="Big Grin :D" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":D" /></p><p><em></em></p><p><em></em></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Robinredbreast, post: 567698, member: 44643"] I had eighteen bottles of Whisky and was told by my wife to empty the contents down the sink or else! I said I would proceed with this unpleasant task. I withdrew the cork from the first bottle and poured it down the sink with the exception of one glass which I drank. I withdrew the cork from the second bottle and did likewise, with the exception of 1 glass which I drank. I extracted the cork from the third bottle and poured the glass down the sink, which I drank. I pulled the cork from the fourth bottle down the sink and poured the bottle down the glass which I drank. I pulled the bottle from the cork of the next and drank sink out of it and threw the rest down the glass which I drank. I pulled the sink out of the next glass and poured the cork down the bottle. Then I corked the sink out of the next glass and poured the cork down the bottle. Then I corked the sink with the glass, bottled the sink and drank the pour. When I had everything emptied I steadied the house with one hand, counted the glasses, corks, bottles and sinks with the other, which was 29 and as the house came by I counted them again. Finally I had the house in one bottle, which I drank. I'm not half as think as you might drunk. I am. I fool so feelish. I don't is me, and the drunker I stand here the longer I get. I'm not under the affluence of incohol as tinkle peep I am. [I]This was found loose inside a book obtained via a local charity shop with no attribution as to the author:hungover:[/I] :D [I] [/I] [/QUOTE]
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