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- Type of diabetes
- Type 2
- Treatment type
- Tablets (oral)
If you're not familiar with the work of Steven Wright, he's the famous erudite (comic) scientist who once said: "I woke up one morning, and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates."
His mind sees things differently than most of us. Here are some of his gems:
- I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
- Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it back.
- Half the people you know are below average.
- 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
- The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
- I almost had a psychic girlfriend... But she left me before we met.
- OK, so what's the speed of dark?
- How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
- If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
- When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
- Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
- Hard work pays off in the future; laziness pays off now.
- What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
- My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
- Why do psychics have to ask you for your name.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
And the all-time favorite:
- If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work?
His mind sees things differently than most of us. Here are some of his gems:
- I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
- Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it back.
- Half the people you know are below average.
- 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
- The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
- I almost had a psychic girlfriend... But she left me before we met.
- OK, so what's the speed of dark?
- How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
- If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
- When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
- Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
- Hard work pays off in the future; laziness pays off now.
- What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
- My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
- Why do psychics have to ask you for your name.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
And the all-time favorite:
- If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work?
