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By telling them my favourite film’s Alien and I have a cat? I know that comment isn’t aimed directly at me and I can understand the baddies thinking I might be deranged and an easy target because I support The Toon, but otherwise, it’s not obvious as to how they’d crack my password, which is...

- Include a photo here if you wish to. - What is your name? David. Hello. - How old are you? 56 - Are you male or female? Androgynous. Not really. All man. - Which country are you from? England - Which city/area do you live in? Berwick - Are you religious? That’s a bit contentious. I want...