Thanks for the explanation - and it wasn't boring at all
Yes, having to drive is a definite reason for eating to make sure your blood sugar stays within range.
I think eating carbs is an individual thing and a matter of experience - you learn what works. For me, there are certain foods that I seem to need a bit extra insulin for, so I do the carb count for them then add a tiny bit more to cover the rise. I do have a pump so I can also fiddle about and get a bolus type that suits me (eg have the insulin delivered over a longer period rather than all in one go). Have you looked at your ratios? It may be that they need adjusting for certain meals or snacks. I say that not so much because of your spikes, but because of the high results there (ignoring the driving one). Could it be you just need a little more insulin, either in your boluses or your basal?
Having your insulin in advance is good. And yes, it is very involved! I'm still tweaking things now after more than 20 years.
I tend to limit my snacks to 20 or 30g carbs and keep them away from my meals. I also add calories by adding things like extra cheese or olive oil or nuts to my food. That can work nicely when you're trying to put weight on.
Just a final,thought - are you bolusing for the whole meal in one go? If I'm having a dessert, I bolus for the main meal, then do another bolus for the dessert. I find that gives me smoother sugars.
I hope you get it all sorted