Hi Smiler, I know people mean well when they say you'll be fine and it will all be ok, well yes, it may well be but don't let that lead you into thinking there's something wrong with you for feeling the way you do right at this moment. This is a life changing event for you, it will last for the whole of your life and will impact upon your day to day activities, it's not just tough at first, it's tough full stop. I say this not to depress you further but to make you realise it is OK to feel like this and perfectly normal. It is like a bereavement for your old carefree life. Having said that, you do have to find a way to cope and as said above, you will find plenty of support on this site. My advice would be to learn all about it, what insulin can and cannot do, how food plays a massive part in it all but that does not mean it's a question of 'inject this amount, eat that amount' and it's all hunky dory. I suspect this is what you have been doing, trying to be 'perfect' and the Nurse has recognised this. As you go along and become more confident you will likely become less terrified and will be able (up to a point) to predict what might happen before it does. The thing is though, that there will be times when no matter what you do, things will go awry. That WON'T be your fault, even if you ignored the whole thing completely that does not mean you are to blame, there are a lot of associated mental health issues that can go hand in glove with this, for all types. Please let us know if there is anything specific we can help with, I promise you we won't be minimising your feelings in any way but trying to provide some practical assistance.