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Children Teasing my son about my Diabetes.

S

shop

Well-Known Member
Messages
665
Hi folkes,

Just wondering what your views are on this and how to handle it. I am so cross at the moment.

T1 for 6 yrs. My son who is 7 knows a little about my diabetes but I have kept it low key. Not brilliantly managed for the past 5 1/2 yrs. tried to blend in and kept it very quiet and as a result mismanaged.

For the past few yrs I have off and on helped in his School with reading and maths ( voluntarily ) The last 5 months have been trying to get better control with help of DSN Hosp etc. ( Never been within target. yet!!) Also had hormonal probs that have caused intermitent but frequent large spells of hypo's ( also now being dealt with ) As a result I explained to school that having probs with diabetes control ( hadnt really mentioned to them before ) so I was not able to help at the moment.( Did'nt want kids seeing me hypo, testing etc as didnt want them teasing my son, previously had run high sugars when went in so as not to risk it!!!!)

My son said tonight " I wish you didnt have diabetes " When I asked him why he said that 2 boys in his classed asked about it and were laughing ( which upset him. )

I feel awful maybe I shouldnt have told the school that I am diabetic and just said I couldnt do it anymore! The 2 boys 1 Auntie is a School Govenor and the other his Mother is a teacher at the school. ( How else would they know!!!)

They gave me some chocolates to say thankyou for helping as the do every end of term ( which my son and hubby devour ) and will probably want me to help again. I am furious though because I kept it quite to avoid my son being teased as ther is so much ignorance out there. ( I just thank god its not him who is diabetic. )

I had been helping voluntarily and felt bad for letting them down. I dont feel like I want to continue to help anymore and am angry with myself for leaving my son vulnerable to this and with the school for the obvoius lack of discression.

Bit of a rant but aslo would value your opinions.

Lucy.xxx
 
Dear shop ((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))) to you X. I am so sorry to read of your heartache and annoyance I also try to keep things low key, type 1 for 23 yrs. Kids can be just nasty for the sake of it. It's not meant at you really, its just showing off and trying to be 'big' in front of other children.

If that was me, I know I would go to the head teacher and have a quite word with them, telling the head exactly what was said and how it is affecting your son and you. It doesn't matter who the parents are, children shouldn't get away with this behaviour. I know it is now school holidays and you can't do anything now, but when your son goes back in September, please speak up. It's best to nip these things in the bud.

Try and enjoy the rest of the school holidays with your lad, he sounds a lovely kid.........just like his mum :thumbup: Take care and try not to worry to much RRB XXXXXXXXXX
 
My wife is a primary school teacher, and has always been of the opinion that any problem should first be taken to the class teacher, and then, if needed, to the head.
Take an "I didn't know if you were aware" approach, and be friendly but firm.
We raised two daughters, and didn't suffer them getting bullying/teasing attention.
My eldest daughter has a son who spent too much time getting such attention at his primary school. Thankfully, he's now flourishing at secondary school. My daughter was often talking to her mother about this, and taking it to the teacher/deputy head/head.

That said, don't get this out of proportion unless it persists. Children can be unintentionally cruel, and it may be simply an educational opportunity for them.
Teach your son how to respond to these others. Teach him to tell the teacher if need be.
Could it be that you are 'so cross' because your son is suffering because of something you've tried to shelter him from i.e. he's being teased not due to himself but you ?

As much as we want to protect our children as they grow, I feel it's more about helping them to confront these life challenges.
I would wait to see if any such behaviour starts again, and if so, approach the class teacher (should work IF they're good.)

Geoff
 
(((((((((Lucy)))))))))) how upsetting for you and your son

I suspect that the children overheard a conversation, might have been something as simple as 'so and so wont be in tomorrow to do reading class because she....' - you need to talk to the parents of these children.

We once had a similar situation where my daughter laughed about a classmates Grandad who had a facial disfigurement. My husband and I were horrified as you can imagine, but we talked to our girl, explained and answered lots of questions and talked about the feelings in our hearts and how much love there is between this girl and her Grandad, how much they enjoy walking their dog and that people with an illness or disability are most definitely not second class citizens and worth and normal as much as anyone else.

Our girl went and made up a 'sorry box' = she took a shoe box, decorated it and put one of her soft toy rabbits, pretty hairclips and some other little items in there and gave it to the other girl next day. We were really pleased because this was her idea alone.

My daughter is 9 years old now, still friends with the other girl and often plays at her house, where the grandfather lives as well.

Your son is clever, I bet he knows quite a bit about diabetes and I bet my rock bottom dollar that he would never laugh about anyone else because they are diabetic, praise your little boy, he is one of the best.
 
Well I would have thought that having a "needle stabbing" mum, would have been just about the coolest thing ever in the world of a 7-year old boy (well that, and the comedy value of testicles).

Like everyone else has said, kids can be cruel, if it wasn't this they'd be teasing him about something else. I actually think that it's just part of growing up (although most men never grow out of it - I spend many of my waking hours trying to think of inventive ways to tease my friends).

My 10 yo son has a missing hand and gets called "a one armed freak" at school. As much as I'd like to stop it, ultimately I just equip him with clever reposts. I'd tell him to reply with "well I'd like to see your mum sticking a needle in her leg".
 
Hiya!

Thanks for yor replys guys.

RRB,

Thanks lovely reply as always. I have initially just said its just because they don't understand and take no notice. I will speak to the Head if I need to, and thanks we will enjoy the holidays....xxx

Libarising,

Thanks for that point of view and totaly see what you are saying. You are so right saying I am cross because the teasing is because of me. My son is quite timid in nature and has had to grow up alot this year and adopt some resiliance in lots of ways. Because of this I have always avoided going in to school and have encouraged his confidence and tried to instill an ability to shrug it off. Which I agree the world is full of strong characters and challenges to overcome. So far this seems to have worked. One instance he was scared of a very loud, strong charachtered teacher and I did have to go and have a chat. I am pleased to say that the way she handled it was great, and a compromise on both sides meant he became more resiliant (not saying ther still isnt a way to go though.)

I lost my mum at the age of 7 and was brought up by my 70 yr old grandmother, I was sensitive and often would get teased that I didnt have a mum and that I had my Nana instead, she would steam in which would 10 times worse, bless her. So I am very keen to foster that resiliance in him that I lacked ( without changing the lovely nature he has. ) I do think that the teacher may be the 1st port of call so thank-you. Maybe there is a learning opportunity there! xxx


WhitbyJet,

You aswell a lovely reply, and handled the situation in a lovely way. You must have been so proud of your daughter to have formed such a lovey gesture. Children do so easily do things that are inapropriate as my son has ( after all they are only childre ) but it isn how we as parents respond to that which helps them to grow into the caring well rounded people for example who have replied to my post this evening. He is a lovely little boy and has a heart of gold, thankyou xxx

Borofergie,

Thanks thats what I have been doing with him prior to this happening, but I love the humour and what a reat response!! My mum is so hard she can stick needles in her! Your son is very lucky to have parents who will equip him with such confidence and resiliance in life regardless on any disability. I agree that we can't change what others say or do but we can affect the way in which we respond! Thank you xxx

Thanks again for your replies and I have taken something from all of them

Lucy xxx :thumbup:
 
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