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<blockquote data-quote="donnellysdogs" data-source="post: 190953" data-attributes="member: 17713"><p>Oh gosh, you are having a hard time of it...and your partner too.</p><p></p><p>There is help for depression which can help alot. I myself have had dreadful depression, and I know it is an ongoing illness that can strike back at any time of my life. I am t1-for 25 years, and a year older than your partner.</p><p></p><p>I was sent a long time a go to see a psychiatrist, whom I could not get to understand me, and I had to keep repeating myself. I went for two appoinments and on my third I took my husband who totally agreed with me that the psychiatrists interpretataions of English was awful....so I called it a day.</p><p></p><p>I have also had one HCP that asked my husband to section me, a long while ago, but my husband refused, and I stayed out of being an in-patient.</p><p></p><p>The best most recent help I have had for almost a year now is: a lovely Counsellor lady who has helped me so much, and although I don't see her weekly anymore, I know that I can phone her at anytime, and will be able to see her. She was booked by my GP.</p><p></p><p>Also I am going to a stress management course-also booked through my GP, which according to another friend who has done the course-says it is brilliant. It apparently isn't like the alchoholics groups where you imagine people saying @Hi, my name is and I am a alcoholic/or in our case a depressive.' I go on Wednesdays starting this week for 2 hours each week. My friend says that just that course helped him so much, that I got my GP to refer me.</p><p></p><p>I also had to go through quite a lot of antidepressants, before getting one that really suits me, and which I am able to take long term.</p><p></p><p>I have had my partner go to every appointment with my GP whilst I have been in such a bad mental state.</p><p></p><p>I also had to vastly change my job. I used to manage large distribution centres, but found I could not manage it anymore, so I changed a hobby in to a job. I did a self learning diploma at home for gardening, and started a fabulous gardening business, and I had some fantastic customers....when we moved to another part of UK, there was no chance of gardening as an income provider-as all the gardeners do here is seem to mow lawns....not redesigning and creating new gardens and maintaining them on an ongoing basis. So I was pretty scuppered.</p><p></p><p>Having been diagnosed with fibromyalgia, which again has a significant amount of depression also linked to the diseas, and now being in fluctuating levels of pain consistently 24/7 I am no longer working, but that is due to the pains-not depression.</p><p></p><p>Both my mum and nan also had depression so it is also a genetic thing in our family as well.</p><p></p><p>It is very hard for partners, and I do not envy you. I admire what you are trying to do to help enormously.</p><p></p><p>First thing I would suggest is to try going to see the GP together, and try to get a double appoinment booked, or the last appointment of the day!!!! So that a proper discussion with GP can happen. </p><p></p><p>I know with me, that my GP would not prescribe diazepan, we went through Citilopram, previously fluoxitine, Pregabalin, Gabapentin, Ampitrytalene and more before I ended up on the most expensive drug I think which is duloxitine. This helps with brain and pain, enables me to sleep so much better and manage myself better with my moods. I had to go and try all the cheaper version of drugs and some awful side effects before I have go to this drug that I can tolerate.</p><p></p><p>If your partners moods aren't lifting and his ability to deal with stress etc is not improving there are alternative things that GP's can try in line with medications, like Counsellors, like Stress Management COurses, like joining the gym at reduced or free prices, and CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy).....some GP's are not so good at coming forward to try these, but mine has been fantastic with his help. Also iHs helped me a lot from this forum. Also my other diabetic HCP's at hospital.</p><p></p><p>There is help, but it may really need your input at a GP appintment, if you can get your partner to agree so that you can both discuss with GP.</p><p></p><p>Accepting change, especially in jobs is never easy. I feel **** that I can no longer do what I used to do, I feel embaressed that my husband is the one and only income provider, and this is again natural with humans...it is just finding a way to manage 1) financially and 2) a better way of thinking about these things....my counsellor was marvellous at this aspect with me.....</p><p></p><p>Very hard for you both. Only my experiences.....2 years ago, you would never have got me to admit to any of this, so this is actually how good I feel - that I can actually talk about my experiences....it helps me and it may help others...I hope so.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="donnellysdogs, post: 190953, member: 17713"] Oh gosh, you are having a hard time of it...and your partner too. There is help for depression which can help alot. I myself have had dreadful depression, and I know it is an ongoing illness that can strike back at any time of my life. I am t1-for 25 years, and a year older than your partner. I was sent a long time a go to see a psychiatrist, whom I could not get to understand me, and I had to keep repeating myself. I went for two appoinments and on my third I took my husband who totally agreed with me that the psychiatrists interpretataions of English was awful....so I called it a day. I have also had one HCP that asked my husband to section me, a long while ago, but my husband refused, and I stayed out of being an in-patient. The best most recent help I have had for almost a year now is: a lovely Counsellor lady who has helped me so much, and although I don't see her weekly anymore, I know that I can phone her at anytime, and will be able to see her. She was booked by my GP. Also I am going to a stress management course-also booked through my GP, which according to another friend who has done the course-says it is brilliant. It apparently isn't like the alchoholics groups where you imagine people saying @Hi, my name is and I am a alcoholic/or in our case a depressive.' I go on Wednesdays starting this week for 2 hours each week. My friend says that just that course helped him so much, that I got my GP to refer me. I also had to go through quite a lot of antidepressants, before getting one that really suits me, and which I am able to take long term. I have had my partner go to every appointment with my GP whilst I have been in such a bad mental state. I also had to vastly change my job. I used to manage large distribution centres, but found I could not manage it anymore, so I changed a hobby in to a job. I did a self learning diploma at home for gardening, and started a fabulous gardening business, and I had some fantastic customers....when we moved to another part of UK, there was no chance of gardening as an income provider-as all the gardeners do here is seem to mow lawns....not redesigning and creating new gardens and maintaining them on an ongoing basis. So I was pretty scuppered. Having been diagnosed with fibromyalgia, which again has a significant amount of depression also linked to the diseas, and now being in fluctuating levels of pain consistently 24/7 I am no longer working, but that is due to the pains-not depression. Both my mum and nan also had depression so it is also a genetic thing in our family as well. It is very hard for partners, and I do not envy you. I admire what you are trying to do to help enormously. First thing I would suggest is to try going to see the GP together, and try to get a double appoinment booked, or the last appointment of the day!!!! So that a proper discussion with GP can happen. I know with me, that my GP would not prescribe diazepan, we went through Citilopram, previously fluoxitine, Pregabalin, Gabapentin, Ampitrytalene and more before I ended up on the most expensive drug I think which is duloxitine. This helps with brain and pain, enables me to sleep so much better and manage myself better with my moods. I had to go and try all the cheaper version of drugs and some awful side effects before I have go to this drug that I can tolerate. If your partners moods aren't lifting and his ability to deal with stress etc is not improving there are alternative things that GP's can try in line with medications, like Counsellors, like Stress Management COurses, like joining the gym at reduced or free prices, and CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy).....some GP's are not so good at coming forward to try these, but mine has been fantastic with his help. Also iHs helped me a lot from this forum. Also my other diabetic HCP's at hospital. There is help, but it may really need your input at a GP appintment, if you can get your partner to agree so that you can both discuss with GP. Accepting change, especially in jobs is never easy. I feel **** that I can no longer do what I used to do, I feel embaressed that my husband is the one and only income provider, and this is again natural with humans...it is just finding a way to manage 1) financially and 2) a better way of thinking about these things....my counsellor was marvellous at this aspect with me..... Very hard for you both. Only my experiences.....2 years ago, you would never have got me to admit to any of this, so this is actually how good I feel - that I can actually talk about my experiences....it helps me and it may help others...I hope so. [/QUOTE]
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