Spencer67
Well-Known Member
- Messages
- 882
- Location
- North West
- Type of diabetes
- Type 1
- Treatment type
- Insulin
- Dislikes
- Carbs and Blue Meanies
novorapidboi26 - thanks, that's good to know.
sue - virtual hugs are always welcome. thank you : )
noblehead - thanks for the welcome.
himtoo - thanks for the link. i understand why you posted it, but I'm not convinced it's a useful tool for me, personally. I don't have a problem in dealing with the fact that i have diabetes; i accepted it a long time ago. I think my problem is more like 'exhaustion' than anything else. I'm just, for want of a better word(s), 'burnt out'.
It's so hard fighting against an invisible enemy; relentlessly putting in a ton of effort merely to keep the tide at bay. And knowing that even if you put the effort in, the tide could easily breach your defenses regardless. It's so easy to just let things slip, especially when the consequences of letting things slip aren't always immediately obvious. I've been taking my eye off the ball more and more over the last few years, which is very likely the cause of the retinopathy mentioned earlier. That diagnosis certainly made me up my game, but after the laser treatment,and a few subsequent check-ups that showed the treatment had been effective, I'm back to square one.
The nicest thing anyone has ever said to me was said by a nurse last year. After my retinopathy had been diagnosed, she asked how well controlled my diabetes was. I said that it was basically pretty up and down. She didn't criticise. She didn't patronise. She simply said, 'yeah, it must be a nightmare'. And sometimes, that's all I need. A hug while being told this would be nice too, obviously ; ) But just the simple recognition that it really isn't easy, and it really can / does have a huge psychological impact, is just amazing. (Luckily they'd already finished shining bright lights in my eyes by that point, because I really couldn't stop myself from welling up).
My parents, bless them, were very much of the opinion that one shouldn't feel sorry for oneself - you just get on with it, because feeling sorry for yourself doesn't get the job done. I think my friends are either a bit wary about mentioning my condition, or, more likely, don't want to appear patronizing or condescending. And I don't want to appear needy by asking them to recognize how difficult this condition is.
So all of this leads me to having to deal with it all on my own. I don't feel I can turn to my family or friends, even though they are all lovely and well meaning. And most of the time, that's OK. But sometimes (and this is becoming more common), I get days like today, weeks like this week, and months like this month where i just want to curl into a ball and cry. Pathetic, I know. But true.
Anyway. Sorry for the emotional splurge! Really needed to get that out, and this forum feels like it might be a relatively safe place to do that.
Ooops! Sorry, I should have replied to this ages ago.Hi Carlos,
How are you. How did you get on with your boss?
Ooops! Sorry, I should have replied to this ages ago.
Yes, she's pretty cool about it, as is her boss. They both understand that diabetes can be tricky from time to time, and I've sent them links to some good pages about burn-out.
That made me chuckle - it's a phrase I've said, like, a million times myself : )Always been so proud of how being diabetic 'doesn't affect me'.
Blimey, I haven't had a holiday for.... *checks calendar* ....a year and a half!Carlos,
Have you had a holiday yet this year?
Blimey, I haven't had a holiday for.... *checks calendar* ....a year and a half!
Ha ha!! You're absolutely right, of course. I do have vague plans, to be honest. It looks extremely likely that I'll be made redundant in a few months, and I'll be spending a small amount of my pay-off on visiting a few friends who've moved out of the UK (definitely Kuala Lumpar and, if I can, Australia, Canada, USA and Sweden).Right Carlos, it's time you booked a holiday. Book time off work, like now ! If you don't I will nagg you until you do.
It will do you the world of good.
kHa ha!! You're absolutely right, of course. I do have vague plans, to be honest. It looks extremely likely that I'll be made redundant in a few months, and I'll be spending a small amount of my pay-off on visiting a few friends who've moved out of the UK (definitely Kuala Lumpar and, if I can, Australia, Canada, USA and Sweden).
Edited to add: hmmm, maybe I mean a large amount of my pay off!
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