Good to hear from you Mummybear, and so glad things are looking and feeling much more positive.
The rollercoaster of emotions will come and go. Even after almost 7 years, I can still have the odd really "Meh!" day, when I just want to sulk, but it passes.
I don't know if you're familiar with the Kubler-Ross Change Cycle, but I find it helps, when I have those days. Some places talk about the Grief Cycle, but that isn't necessarily referring to death, but can be to stuations, or times past, and yearning for them back.
We can jump on and off the cycle at any point, but usually we experience something like it.
https://www.ekrfoundation.org/5-stages-of-grief/change-curve/
Keep on keeping on going. It's very worth it.