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Having one of those days....

Debloubed

Debloubed

Well-Known Member
Messages
828
Location
Aylesbury
Type of diabetes
Type 1
Treatment type
Pump
Dislikes
When people say 'Pacific' instead of 'Specific' :-)
for the last few days I have really struggled to remind myself why I don't mind being Diabetic?! I realise how ridiculous that sounds and usually I am extra-positive but I was stuck in traffic the other day and even with the convenience of my pump I found myself thinking 'oh ***!!!' about it all. No particular reason, no low or high had brought it on, I was just pondering and well, getting a bit annoyed about it all! I know, I know, nothing I can do about it, it's happened and it won't go away but wouldn't it be nice, for one day, to just not have to worry about it?! and I mean that, I have genuine concerns daily, if I have highs I flap about the damage they could cause and if I have lows I flap about how dangerous they can be for me and those around me (driving etc). and yes, I test a million times every single day but then I even test my tests and discover that my BG can drop from 7 to 3.5 in 20 mins!! Can't remember what caused that, no doubt user error but jeez, I am just a human (and a blonde one at that :lol:)

Sorry for the rant people. Just feeling down in the dumps today :( :roll:
 
Sorry you are feeling down and fed up, but I think its only human, everyone has " those days " even without the Diabetes . I was only dx 6 months ago and mostly upbeat and positive but I have the odd fed up day , so gentle hugs to you, hope you feel better soon x
 
Hi Debloubed,
Sending you ((((hugs)))). I think we all have days like you are experiencing but it will pass.

Catherine.
 
I used to ponder the 'why me' question as I'm the only diabetic of any type in my family, I come from a large family 8 brothers and sisters all older with the exception of my twin, I'm a great-aunty and likely to be a great-great aunty before I'm 50 (which is still several years off) even my cousins are now grandparents themselves but where every I look there isn't another diabetic of either type... (we've researched my family tree back to 1127 on my mum's side, but not quite that far on dads) no signs/hints of diabetes can be found..

I've lived with my diabetes for over 20 years, and all this time the 'cure' is just around the corner, everytime I see it mentioned yep I do the 'if, if' senerrio... I've ponder the artifical pancreas that does it all, I've even ponder the insulin that switches on and off at need and many of the other notions and ideas along the way...

But with all this ponder and wishful thinking I'm always lead back to me...

And in truth even though I wish that I could put my diabetes on the back buner, not bother with BG testing, working out my pump dose, keeping a tab on my control etc not having a care in the world about what I munch...

If the 'cure' did come along and I was offered it... I do a runner and wouldn't accept :?

I have become so accustomed to what I do day in and day out, I be too scared to accept a cure, as I actually do not know how I would cope living without doing what I've come accustomed to doing day in and day out..

Strange old world
 
thanks guys!

Jopar, I am very similar with regards to being the 'only one' in my family other than a 3rd cousin on my Dad's side (his 3rd cousin) who we think (Grandparents told me when they were alive!) that he had diabetes although we can't be sure if type 1 or 2. Other than that, not a sausage! Just me :) As for a 'cure', I'm game for that but only if it was take this pill, no more testing, jobs a good'un! :lol:

I guess you just don't know about a cure......but I will wait and see, never say never :D
 
we're allowed a down day where the entirety of this stinky thing can just hit us.
But then it's back to what is normal for us :lol:
Keep on trucking and keep posting as it does help :)
 
ham79 said:
we're allowed a down day where the entirety of this stinky thing can just hit us.
But then it's back to what is normal for us :lol:
Keep on trucking and keep posting as it does help :)
Click to expand...

Sir, yes sir!! back to normal 'sigh' :lol:

Thanks :D
 
Hi Debloubed,

Needless to say, we all get these days when for no other reason, the realisation of it all just hits us out of the blue. I am sure that is why there is a high percentage of people with diabetes suffering with depression, as you say we never get a day off!

Hope you are feeling much better, it is good that you are open and honest and don't mind sharing your experience, good or bad, but be assured that we all have days like this.

Regards

Nigel
 
Hi Debloubed, Sorry to hear you're a bit cheesed off. I myself am not diabetic, but my husband is and so are 2 of my children. Like you, there is no one else in his family with the condition and he also comes from a large family.

I get those days where I think 'why us', why have 3 of my dear loved ones got this condition which takes over all our lives.

My husband has lived with the condition for around 25 years and does get totally fed up with it and I know it breaks his heart that the 2 of our kids have it. Generally we don't dwell on it, but like you, we have those moments where it just consumes us and we can't stop thinking about it. I tend to find that when things are going well I don't worry about it as much, but it can take something small to trigger those dark feelings, and that 'something' may not necessarily be related to their diabetes.

I hope that you feel better soon and like Nigel says, it is good to share your experience good or bad as it means that you are dealing with your feelings, and as you can see from all the replies we all have days like this as well. Leggott
 
From a bit of an incident at Khaleb's daycare last week I was having a bit of anxiety about leaving Khaleb at his Early Learning Centre (who are much better than his daycare centre). I went out to get a microwave (mine broke) and backed out of a carpark into a solid object :oops: . So now I have a broken microwave and tail light. I'm blaming diabetes for my lack of concentration as I've never hit anything in 20 yrs of driving. Next time I drop Khaleb off I think I'll stay home until I get a bit of confidence back. By the way, all was fine when I picked him up and his bsl 5.8 and about to have lunch!
 
Hi Jen, great post from you as usual. Just noticed Kelab's latest HbA1c - excellent. All that hard work and getting up in the night has paid off. Keep up the good work - Leggott
 
Hi Leggott,

Yeah, Khaleb's medical team liked his hba1c. It doesn't seem to be the norm for young kids to be doing so well. The main difference being that most kids Khaleb's age are quite newly diagnosed, where Khaleb and I are nearing the 3 yr mark. Experience counts for something. Khaleb did have a couple of low's (in the 2's, at 2am, of course) while he was sick so I'm not really prepared to boast about his result. It still would have been fine and below 7% but the combination of the hypos and the many blood tests he's had for thyroid function may have lowered it those extra few 'point somethings'.
 
thanks everyone, good to know you are all on the same side as me! :P and nice that I can be so open and honest on here so hats off to you all :D
 
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