Living with a partner with uncontrolled type 2 diabetes

Robinredbreast said:

Everybody's input is important to someone and I agree with Molly's post here

All the best for tomorrow Molly, many here will be thinking of you. Good luck

RRB x

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@Robinredbreast ....thank you.....i do however have serious concerns as to whether he will actually attend the appointment tomorrow given his comments this evening and current state of health / mind.....will just have to see what happens in the morning...

So the verdict is in…..first of all, thankfully, he did attend his appointment this morning despite last night’s threat that he wouldn’t…

Results of HbA1c test was 74 or 8.9%....this is down slightly from previous which I think was about 10% but still not enough…hence the bottom line is that he will referred to the diabetic specialist nurse with a view to starting on insulin.

This was totally as I expected.....it was going to happen at some point.... and to be honest I was somewhat surprised that we hadn’t reached this point at the last appointment back in July.

Of course his initial reaction is that he does not want to go on insulin but I think that he will just have to accept that this is the case…..we should get an appointment in two to three weeks so this will give him a bit of time to get used to the idea and for me to persuade him that this is for his own good and is necessary to get his diabetes under control….

As I type this I can already hear and anticipate some of the responses I will get but at this point in time I do sense that this is the option that we will have to accept…..by some miracle he may start to find some alternatives through diet / exercise but quite frankly that has not happened up to now despite my best efforts…..there is always the glimmer of hope that this is the wake up call that he has been waiting for but I am not holding out for any miraculous changes…

The one reason that he stated to me about not wanting to go onto insulin after the appointment was that this would mean he couldn’t drive but I know that this is not necessarily the case….he will at least now be forced to inform his insurance company and DVLA but I don’t see that as any bad thing…as I pointed out if it got to the stage where he lost his sight he wouldn’t be able to drive anyway….best we try to avoid getting to that point…

I guess there was some good news in that his blood pressure was within acceptable limits at 132/68 so at least the medication here is doing its job….and his weight had remained relatively stable at 123kg despite the increase in gliclazide which I had read can lead to weight gain..

Obviously I will now have a hundred and one questions to ask the good members of the forum as we move into uncharted territory but at least for now that is where we have got to…

A few mixed emotions today.....relief in a sense that insulin is now being suggested and that hopefully some more help will be available to deal with this from specialist diabetic nurse .....and a sense of sadness that it has actually come to this point where we are embarking on the next step in terms of more medication (insulin)....and that there are already a number of complications listed on his medical records...
Have not thought about it too hard because it may then get scary.....just trying to accept where we are at and then take it one step at a time....

donnellysdogs said:

Insulin isn't all bad Molly. The way he was going was likely to cause retinopathy with his eyes longterm and if that can be avoided by lowering the BG results the better. He will not like having to test frequently or every time he gets behind the wheel. However, he would lose his license anyway if he lost his sight, so a few tests isn't the end of the world to keep his license.

Has OH had his eyes tested Molly? He could be better persuaded if he thinks he could be liable with unstable bloods, which he currently has which could cause him to have eye sight problems.

I was just reminded of this, because I had all my eye tests done today and yay, I'm singing... No retinopathy, perfect pressure and peripheral. Optician said I was her best Longterm T1 diagnosed patient..... Yyyyyyaaaaayyyyyy!!!!!

However, Molly. Good that he went, blood pressure ok etc... Considering the holiday, results could have been worse, so your attempts to bring lower carbs in to diet has staved off a higher bg, which could have happened... I know he not perfect with his eating, but he would have been horrendous if you not around.

So insulin not the end of the world, although he will have to carb count then too unless he goes on to a mixed insulin where it is slightly less necessary according to the DSN,s....

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@donnellysdogs ...I knew it would get to this / was expecting it so no great surprises ....and in a way a sense of relief....

His records show that he has background retinopathy...I know this from his last screening but it said no immediate action required or words to that effect...just come back next year and try to keep blood sugars down.....just one of a number of complications that are now coming to light...
Good news on your results...

Have not really discussed it with him since ....just letting the news sink in ....but guess there may be a few obstacles to cross along the way ...not sure that he has accepted this is what he needs and can sense that there will be some resistance..

Whilst waiting for the appointment it was suggested that he begins to test on a regular basis so that we have a record of recent levels...will try to encourage at least two or three times a day (morning / before dinner / before bed)

All of this is new territory for me and to be honest a bit scary but am sure I will get my head round it....will have to start reading up on carb counting and work out what that involves in terms of meal planning etc..as I guess it will ultimately come down to me to see that he is taking the right amount of insulin (he has no clue about the tablets he currently takes so the whole idea of adding insulin into the mix is a worrying issue)

Just a quick question about the driving ...I know that he will need to inform DVLA and his insurance company about going on to insulin and have already looked at / downloaded the form.....once he gets round to completing the form and sending it off does this mean that technically he is unable to drive until having his licence approved or can he continue to drive in the meantime....have not seen anything yet that tells me ...

Think some stress relief is now called for ....more material donated yesterday for my bags to be sorted...

donnellysdogs said:

Normally!! a person can carry on driving unless the consultant tells you not to. If the consultant says no (not heard of this from a newbie tho) then OH would have to stop driving.

If the consultant has any doubts at all as to whether your OH is going to conform then he could advise to stop driving tho.......

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@donnellysdogs Thanks for info....
....just took a quick look about carb counting I found on a forum member's link....looked a bit complicated and doubt he will understand it with the maths involved......time enough to sort that later.....have retreated to sewing mode

iHs said:

Molly

Lots of type 2s go on to needing insulin eventually as the pancreas loses its action after a number of years but of course, eating too much high carb food doesnt help. It might not necessarily mean insulin anyway as there are other type 2 injectable meds but if it is insulin, then it might just be a background insulin like Lantus. Compared to years ago, 4mm pen needles are very tiny and thin and the pens are easy to use and the jab will only take about 1-2mins to do. OH will have to test his bg and work out the carb content of food but once bg levels are a bit lower, then things will get better.

As for driving....he'll be able to drive as he is and inform DVLA once insulin is started.

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@iHs ....thanks for the info...am sure it will all be ok once I get my head round it ....and hopefully he will too...I think not being able to drive is one of his greatest fears (and mine) as this would really limit him in terms of getting out and about...

daddys1 said:

Hi Molly,
What's your OH doing while you are getting all this info for him, doesn't he want to know anything about how the future will be and what he will have to do?
Neil

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@daddys1 ....Neil, the simple answer to your question is no......

..the slightly longer version is that if left to deal with this himself he would probably not have attended the appointment today...he would probably stop taking his medication tomorrow and would probably just eat and drink whatever he liked and sleep all day........at times I think that he doesn't want a future which is really sad but that is how it is or how it seems...

It is especially sad because he is not that old (as both the diabetic nurse and knee consultant each told him this week) but it is as if he has just given up on life.....don't know if it was you or someone else without looking back but someone did say recently that he sounded depressed and that this needed sorting out first...I agree he may be depressed but also think that the high sugar levels are certainly contributing to his state of mind....

I would suggest to him that he should start looking into what is involved but feel that this may actually be counter productive at this point...I think he just needs time to accept that insulin is the next step and hopefully it will all be explained to him in detail by the specialist diabetic nurse when we get to see her.....much of the research and info that I gather and the questions that I ask is so that I am fully briefed and can then provide the appropriate support for him when he needs it..

Apologies for the long winded answer but hope that answers your question