London Gay Pride

4 July 2009 - sorry I can't join everyone there (is there a diabetic group marching?), but energy levels, money and dog-sitting say that I stay in North Powys. But I send my best wishes to anyone going there, as does the Princess B'Elana, Queen of the F***ing Universe.

<reversion to grumpy old man> it's not the same as the old days when it was a big political demonstratation....

hugs, rottie slurps, and bright blessings

Steve

cyrryan said:

Hi all,
The setting up of a forum for people who are gay and have diabetes would be very beneficial.
It is good this forum opens up a door!

Cheers
C

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Years ago, I would have been with you on this one, but times change... First change is the change in public opinions towards Lesbians, gay men, and transgendered people. That has certainly gone more our way than I ever expected it to in my lifetime (and I'm only 52, albeit with a diagnosis of aids to go with my D2). People who make it onto specialised internet forums as opposed to gambling sites and facebook tend to be a bit more broadminded and intelligent than you might think - well, aren't we?

You're welcome to PM me if you feel that there's something only someone you know for sure is gay can help, but I can assure you that I'm not the only gay in the forum <tired old joke> though I do intend making a t-shirt or two with a photo of my dog and the caption "The only rottweiler in the village", just as soon as someone can tell me my Welsh translation is accurate (gotta have every bilingual!)

The trouble with splitting fora into smaller and smaller interest groups is that you end up with and interest group of just one or two. Example my brother has D1, and reckons that he got it from radical stomach surgery before the discovery of helicobacter pylorii at the end of the eighties. I've got type two, which I'm as sure as I can be is a result of taking anti-HIV drugs. Before my brother and I there were no indications of diabetes in the family whatsoever: we regard our present conditions as co-incidence. But perhaps, since my brother is also gay we should set up a forum for gay siblings with non-concordant diabetes... You see where it leads? Far better we just muck in together under the lowest common denomiter and explain extra details as we go along, if necessary.

Anyway, lecture over :mrgreen: - I do know that I go on a bit...

Croeso!

Steve

And I'm delighted to see you back! How have you been?

You set me to thinking: okay I was happily married (to a man: it was very romantic - we exchanged wedding rings outside HS Samuels in Peckham Rye. No reception, just shopping in Safeways) for most of the past ten years. Soon after that the kids started coming along, and people get edgy when you take rottweilers into a bar, so I haven't actually been inside a gay bar in over ten years. In fact the only gay people I know I know are friends from the old days who I keep in touch with. I was on high dose ritonavir and it's true: it's chemical castration, and also is a leading cause amongst HIV drugs of hyperglycaemia. I'm not taking it any more, but I just got out of the habit... Besides, you can almost as much fun window-shopping! And without having to make small talk over breakfast in the morning.

I'm sure someone's already said it to you, but if you need to inject with people around, explain what it is, show them the whatsit - people get paranoid and it's not their fault that that they're stupid. They're better of than the people the kid saw in The Sixth Sense. Maybe... ;-)

Twenty years ago I was expressing the hope that eventually HIV would eventually become manageable, like diabetes. Joke's on me: if I could get rid of only one from my life I'd choose diabetes, despite going through a spell of low-immune-system nasties right now. I think the reason for feeling like that is that I long ago made peace with HIV (or at least established a truce) which is something I haven't yet done with diabetes.

I know it sounds horrible political correctness having mental health difficulties, but I never think of myself as diabetic. I have diabetes or live with diabetes. Same thing with aids. My illnesses do not define who I am. I'm Steve the rottweiler (as opposed to Steve the smokes or Steve the smithy - lotta Steves in our valley!), who'll you see twice a day out with the dog, or wandering up to the old shop with a meal in a pot, or a bottle of wine, or on the bus into Welshpool and so on... Who just happens... get my drift?

Hwyl

Steve

caspararemi said:

cyrryan said:

I am still struggling with diabetes and been gay!

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The mind boggles - what diabetes issues have been a hinderance when trying to 'be gay'? I don't think it's ever been a problem for me! I'm actually trying to rack my brain to think of a situation where I've thought it'd be easier if I wasn't diabetic. Ok, maybe going out and staying over at someones flat when I've not planned ahead and taken insulin with me, but that's often a good excuse for an early morning getaway where one is needed :lol:

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In the words of the anonymous gay steel worker in the Simpson's episode Homer's Phobia: "Oh, be nice". A lot of people feel self-conscious when there's something different about them, and being gay and being diabetic definitely fit into the category of different. The trick is to ignore the difference. You and I might be perfectly comfortable about being gay and diabetic: why should we assume that everyone else in the same position is? Besides which, the post you're responding to is from last December: who, apart from cyrryan, knows how cyrryan is feeling now?

caspararemi said:

I responded as I'm genuinely curious! I've always considered the two utterly separate and would like to know what issues might be faced I haven't considered, possibly to offer some support & reassurance that its not impossible to get by as a gay diabetic

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Take as your analogy HIV. Now before everyone gathers up theirs skirts in a hissy fit (not that I expect them too, but I do like the image!) about how diabetes is nothing like HIV, in the dark days of the eighties, when everyone had a funeral to go to every week, our shining hope was that that HIV would become a controllable illness, "just like diabetes".

I have type 2 diabetes, so I can easily hide my gliclazide in with the rest of the pills. (Not that I get the chance to have anyone to hide them from out here in the middle of nowhere!) My brother (T1, HIV-) is constantly aware of the curiosity and occasional hostility of others when he needs to inject. There are times when you think public ignorance couldn't go any lower, and then it does. My brother is something of a high flyer, eating in the expensive places, yet has still been asked to "do it in the toilet". Injecting, that is...

It's really difficult to say any more as it was cyrryan's posts that opened up this discussion beyond the narrow parameters of last year's Pride. Maybe this difficulty is a reason why a separate forum would be a good idea: from what I've seen over the past [mumblety]five years (okay, I remember the Sex Pistols) coming out hasn't got any easier, and though I've only been diagnosed diabetic for a few years, I'm still coming to terms with that while still dealing wih life as an out gay man in a small village - no, smartarse, it's not Llanddewi Brefi, though I do have the only rottweiler in the village. The fact that I'm also a longterm survivor of HIV disease (and that my diabetes was almost certainly caused by the anti-hiv drugs) is another thing to think about.

I can imagine situations where a diagnosis of diabetes encourages someone to go the rest of the way and start coming out as lesbian/gay in a "let's get it all over with". I recant my posting of 02 August 2009 and hereby state that I think that lesbians, and especially gay men (as a result of early versions of anti HIV drugs) should have a self run forum within this board.

Steve