More Calm

I am sharing this with you because it definitely worked for me today and we could all probably use some more calm in our lives. Some doctor on TV this morning said the way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started. So I looked around my house to see things I'd started and hadn't finished and, before leaving for work this morning I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of Chardonnay, a bodle of Baileys, a butle of wum, a pockage of Prungles, tha mainder of bot Prozic and Valiuminun scriptins, the res of the chesescke an a box of chocletz.
Yu haf no idr how bludy fablus I feel rite now. Please sned this orn to dem you fee ar in ned ov ienner pisss. An telum u fukin luvum.