Hi
@Jrsmith that all sounds really tough
but you're not alone, I reckon your experience isn't so unusual. Personally, I go though periods where my control is good and then it all explodes and my BG is all over the place and with it the associated guilt and stress - in part because T1D is just stressful (obvs) and in part because I find high BG makes my anxious.
I've found finding the things that help my mental health at least as challenging as finding the right insulin levels but fwiw some of the things that normally help with me:
- re running fasting tests to make sure my basal insulin is correct - this helps metabolically but also my mental health because it is a positive thing I'm doing to make a difference, something I can do and control.
- talking to other T1 diabetics
- using technology to help me not stress me e.g. set alarms on my Libre at the points where I will take action and avoiding having my BG on glanceable screens
- testing and the trusting my hypo/ hyper treatment i.e. doing what I know should work and then being patient and avoid rage bolusing or eating all the sugar in the house
- exercise (helps with my mental health + insulin sensitivity + short term BG)
- a bit like the fasting test, experimenting to find the activation curve for insulin in my body (e.g. I use Fiasp and find it lasts a little less time than advertised + is way less effective when I'm high i.e. I need more when I'm high than in range but that also means any IOB after correcting for a Hyper hits me hard and risks taking me low)