Hi Sub,
Just wanted to say, sounds like we're very much in the same boat!! My daughter turns 2 on Friday, she was diagnosed as type 1 in December.
It's certainly not easy getting good BG results!!
We have, like you been giving nova rapid after eating. To begin with we were only giving levemir in the morning, but a few months in we split it and gave some in the morning and some at night, this made a big difference (all in consultation with diabetes team of course!!)
It's very frustrating when they won't eat, the only thing you can do is reduce nova rapid/not give any for when she doesn't eat - she'll still need the long lasting insulin though.
Don't be too hard on yourself, it's takes time to get things sorted, though I know how frustrating it is!!
Good luck with everything.