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Partners

Nathaningram

Nathaningram

Member
Messages
7
Type of diabetes
Type 1
Treatment type
Insulin
I have been with my wife for 4 years now I was diagnosed with t1 07:02:14 and I have noticed that she treats me different now she doesn't do things like she use to and when I talk about it she changes the subject it is starting to get to me.
 
Hey @Nathaningram maybe she is finding it difficult, try talking to her about it some more, she might not understand diabetes, she might need her mind putting at ease that you're ok.. There's always lots of people here for you to talk to,

Abbie :)
 
When we have diabetes our partners have to live with the
Diabetes too .
Only not as directly - its not in their bodies .

Some partners need time to adapt and cope with any changes
It may affect them with .
Feelings , thoughts , routine , regime .
Our moods and temperament can be affected by the blood sugars too .

My hubby knows when I need to test and am due more insulin .
I have noticed his voice and tone will change subtley .
As he clocks the changes with myself .

He even knows my BG ranges better than I do ...
He lives with it too and is often accurate on my readings .

I often leave him to take it all for granted .
As he rarely expresses his thoughts and feelings .
So when he does open up and says things I am quite
shocked to hear his points and view on things .

A cuddle and quiet word with each other soon puts us
both the right way up .
 
anna29 said:
When we have diabetes our partners have to live with the
Diabetes too .
Only not as directly - its not in their bodies .

Some partners need time to adapt and cope with any changes
It may affect them with .
Feelings , thoughts , routine , regime .
Our moods and temperament can be affected by the blood sugars too .

My hubby knows when I need to test and am due more insulin .
I have noticed his voice and tone will change subtley .
As he clocks the changes with myself .

He even knows my BG ranges better than I do ...
He lives with it too and is often accurate on my readings .

I often leave him to take it all for granted .
As he rarely expresses his thoughts and feelings .
So when he does open up and says things I am quite
shocked to hear his points and view on things .

A cuddle and quiet word with each other soon puts us
both the right way up .
Click to expand...

Well put, Anna - much better than I could have done.

I am only T2, so it's not as in yer face as being T1 but even so, my wife has had to come to terms with being married to someone who has a chronic condition, when previously I'd been fine. There are many good things about it: I am slimmer and fitter than I have been for years, and before I was diagnosed, she had been convinced for some time that I wasn't well, and worried about it a lot. She's not backward in coming forward about things, to put it mildly, so she's inclined to express her concerns, whatever they may be, and being a typical reserved Brit, I often feel that she's making an unnecessary fuss. In that sense, my problem is the reverse of the OP's, but it's the same issue - a reluctance on the part of one partner to talk about things that disturb us, or over which we feel that we may have limited control. In truth, I think it requires a change in an individual's attitude to thinking and talking about "difficult" subjects - and that will take time. In the mean time, try to understand that she is going through a process of adjustment to unwelcome news, just as you have been, and that it's not always possible to move seamlessly into a set of altered circumstances.

HTH
 
She's probably worried about how it's going to affect you, not only physically but mentally. Did you get any leaflets from when you were diagnosed that you could let her read through? It might help if she know what you are likely to be going through and how it will affect you. If you didn't get anything when diagnosed you should be able to get some info from your surgery. It will hopefully make you a stronger couple and you can face it together.
 
Nathaningram said:
I have been with my wife for 4 years now I was diagnosed with t1 07:02:14 and I have noticed that she treats me different now she doesn't do things like she use to and when I talk about it she changes the subject it is starting to get to me.
Click to expand...
I can only talk about this from a parent/child point of view in that it is hard being the one that doesn't have it. This condition affects you but it is not happening to you. There is a sense of not being in control because it's not your condition. Yet it is present everyday. There is also a fear factor. My greatest fear was that my daughter would die during the night and it took a long time for me to trust in our ability to get her figures right before she went to sleep. Your wife could also be concerned about the future i.e. Children. Talk to your wife in a non threatening place but somewhere she can't really leave like a restaurant and tell her you are worried about her and want to hear her point of view. You could always write her a letter or email expressing your concerns and that gives her time to think what she wants to say and come back to you in her own time. Hope all goes well.
 
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