@iliveinessex - you're not alone by a long shot.
There are several things in play here but these are my observations and you will need to work out what works for you.
1. going to bed reduces stress and your BG can drop by 1-2 mmol/L in the first 30 min, so be ready for that and have an appropriate snack before bed.
2. depending on when you take your Lantus, your BG will fall, so I take it as I go to bed knowing it won't be active in the first 30 min.
3. my nighttime Lantus (10 units) kicks in 60=90 minutes later, so I make sure my BG is about 5.5-6.0 before going to sleep.
4. As
@jaywak noted, the dawn phenomenon kicks in about 3-4 am and there are ways to control this
(i) insulin pump
(ii) getting up and taking a couple of units of fast-acting insulin
(iii) my preference, getting on my exercise bike and burning 500kcal in 30 min
(iv) let it happen and do (ii)/(iii) when you get up (which is where most of us were before CGMs!)
Something I've observed is that the dawn phenomenon produces insulin resistance, and I needed more fast-acting than normal. I used 6-8 units before with no effect (!) and a risk of hypo later, and now I prefer the exercise bike. Increasing Lantus won't drive down the dawn phenomenon without causing a hypo risk at some point.