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Sorry. but you gotta laugh!!

R

rickster

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Stafford, Staffordshire, England
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nothing particularly specific
The old widow living oppsite me is about 80 years of age, living alone her husband died many years ago. She does however have sons and a daughter, several grandchildren and great grandchildren. During the week she recieves many visitors from her family, particularly at the weekend. Her eldest son lives many miles away and stops with her over the Saturday night then travels home Sunday evening.

He takes her shopping and treats her to Sunday lunch out at a country pub.

Her does most of her odd jobs and this morning he set about painting the space over the garage door, under the roof. He's no fool this keen DIYer. The red painted up-and-over door has been cleverly covered with and old sheet to prevent any of the new white paint splashing onto the red door. Lowering the door and using a small set of steps he sets about the task. All goes well, descending the steps from time to time to move them slightly for the area now out of reach.

Worked it out yet?? Eventually, brush in hand, tin of paint in the other, co-ordination of feet movng down the steps and hands occupied the tin went from his clutch.

Shame he didn't use the sheet to cover his 57 plate, black VW.

Sack the juggler!!! :lol:
 
Funny to watch but not funny for him.
When I was younger I lived in a block of flats on the first floor and I viewed a block of garages from my window. It was like looking at a brick wall because the back of them faced me. One day I was on the phone and looking out and I saw my neighbour's car emerge through the wall!! This was followed by a hand coming out and picking up a plastic bag that had come out too. It really was strange. The bit that I was pleased about was that he was always moaning about women drivers and I let him know that I had seen what happened. He reckoned his foot slipped off the clutch. Well he must have been accelerating hard too!! :twisted: The car was a write off and of course the garage had to be repaired. I suppose it could have been worse, he could have hit the bottom flats as well.
 
think my neighbours incident was marginally luckier than yours 'cause his was a water-based paint so it washed off. the driveway got a bit too but i diddn't like to go over and gloat... sorry, i mean sympathize. have a smashing week.rickster
 
An elderly chap took a Fiesta for a test drive at our local garage and irritably told the salesman he was quite capable of driving an automatic, even though he'd never done so before. He roared straight across the road and through the window of the posh frock shop, which subsequently had to be rebuilt.
He later tried to sue the garage because the airbag burnt his thumb when it went off... :mrgreen:
 
hi Grumpy... trying to fathom out if that's a joke. Had a few drinks, it is the weekend you know, but can't see how he burnt his thumb?? Had an automatic myself many years ago. 3 and half litre Rover V8. 'Whatsit' off a shovel and dropped it in reverse myself at some traffic lights. Luckily when i pulled away (in low gear, i thought) i went the opposite direction and there was nothing behind. Close shave eh... Have a good week Grumpy. Kind regards. Rickster
 
Some years ago, when we were living in Germany, I scraped the wallpaper off the living room walls and was painting the plaster with a duck-egg blue paint. Having arrived at the limit of my reach I climbed down off the ladder, removed the paint brush, the tray and the roller, as well as the kitchen roll which I used to clean up the odd drip. I then folded the stepladder, and was quite unexpectedly hit on the shoulder by the open can of paint which I had omitted to remove. I was covered in a fetching shade of blue from shoulder to feet. The floor took most of the rest, and the bit leftover covered the stepladder.
My wife thought it was hilarious. I was quite grumpy about it for a couple of hours. I couldn't see what she was laughing at.
 

That explains what happened when I stopped in a queue at traffic lights with a side road between my Mini & the Humber in front, & he drove back about 10 yards into me. He admitted liability & paid for the damage.

Thinks :idea: Did you ever own a Humber ... :wink: :?:
 
We were developing labels for "Airbags" & were told then of the need to keep them absolutely smooth because a crash survivor sued because he was grazed by the stitching....

Some people don't know when to be grateful.
 
I live along a long straight road, which although it's narrow and obviously a suburban street of houses, tempts many drivers to speed. About 8 houses up, there's a deceptive bend. We've had the local telephone pole knocked over several times and the house opposite me was hit by a car, which missed the bend. Leading to major repairs being needed. His neighbour's garden wall was demolished. When the road was resurfaced, a drunken woman driver ended up spending the night in her car in a 40 cm deep hole, because she knocked over the warning sign and went in. This is the only road around here without either humps or chicanes, so we get everybody who is in a hurry. I walk most places and had a real scare the other day, when walking across the crossroads, in a straight line. A car came fast and felt like it was going to hit me. Whatever happened to pedestrian rights of way?
 
Spent a very long time last autumn preparing and spraying a car. Was ill over most of the winter so didn't get time to finish it. Started work on it again about a month ago just lightly polishing (ruddy great power polisher with foam 'bonnet' and cutting paste) and got a bit carried away and went right through the nice new paint in a couple of places. Instead of waiting and buying a tiny brush to cover my enthusiasm, I touched in with a 1" brush I had in the garage. It looked awful and the brush marks were disgusting, so out with the wet and dry to rub out the marks - and through to the undercoat again, only this time the patches were a lot bigger. A friend who is a coachpainter told me to touch in the bits using a roller instead of a brush - and this led to an even bigger mess :shock: Have ordered more paint this morning as the whole car needs to be rubbed down and done again now. Must be getting too old for all of this Have managed to crack a rib in the process and purely medicinally have been having brandy to ease the discomfort. It hasn't had any bad effects on my BS so t isn't all bad news!!!
 
A local young man has a streamlined Porch in his father's garage.

His father drove in with his Mercedes & used the Porch as a ramp!
 
rickster said:
hi Grumpy... trying to fathom out if that's a joke. Had a few drinks, it is the weekend you know, but can't see how he burnt his thumb?? Rickster
Click to expand...
Not a joke, just the facts as reported to me by a garage employee...I suppose if your hand's on the wheel when the doobrey goes off - it's deployed by a small explosion, I believe.
I dunno; touch wood, I've only hit a deer in my smart car, and airbags didn't go off then!
 
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