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Teen daughter .t1 Really starting to upset her

J

jake667

Member
Messages
19
Type of diabetes
Parent
Treatment type
I do not have diabetes
Been awhile since I’ve posted anything. the 3rd was my daughters 3 year anniversary of her week long hospital stay in ccu and finding out she was type1. Well it’s been a long 3 years to say the least . She’s now 15+ freshman in high school 4.0 student great kid. So proud of her . She has flat out refused to do pump therapy iv tried everything to get her to but it’s her choice in the end .she has a dexcom she does shots instead .of course her a1cs arnt where I’d like them to be .she has a high insulin tolerance and a wicked dawn effect . Being a teen girl doesn’t help either so yeah we struggle with management and she’s way over the top with her food intake control never wants to deviate from her norms. But all that aside she’s starting to really resent being different. And the anger about it I can feel more and more everyday . I know and remember how early high school is A nightmare .that transition from a kid to young adult is rough . Her friend group lags behind in that maturing phase she’s been forced to deal with things they can’t and may never understand . And it’s killing us as parents to watch this and be unable to do anything about it . My wife has made a appointment with a diabetic consoler and I’m hopeing she will open up to someone and maybe that will help . I guess I’m asking those of you who have went through the teen years being type1 what helped ,what didn’t ,what do you wish would of happened to help over come this feeling of being the odd one out because of this so unfair condition . Thanks again
 
Hi @jake667 ,

Wracking my brain & thinking back to my teens..

Just be a cool parent & focus on her positives. I was pretty handy around the house regarding involvement with the family unit, but I also "explored" a bit of a wild side. Which I protected my folks from?
My friends were all pretty much "outsiders" & oddly enough were accepted by my perents. Lol, we all turned out OK some 35 years later with a few mess ups along the way...

The pump is not for me either. (& they weren't around as an option in my day.) Of course you care. But at that age, we start thinking a little more & working out our own independence. Whether we have this condition or not..

Sounds like a normal teen to me!
 
I think a large issue is body image she doesn’t like the g6 cause you can see it though some clothes . Just wish she would just say ok I have this but I’m not gona let it control me . Instead of hiding it .
 
Look when I was her age I ignored my diabetes other than not skipping my injections. This was pre glucometer so the only testing you could do was a chemistry experiment involving some drops of urine in a test tube. I have no idea what my hba1cs were but I'm quite sure they were awful as they certainly were when I got my first glucometer at 20.

So maybe her hba1c would be better with a pump but a pump is a big commitment that you have to want to make, and honestly many of us manage fine with a basal/bolus regime. And pumps have cons ans well as pros. Personally I don't care about body image but just the thought of messing about with canulas and the higher risk of dka if my pump malfunctions leaves me cold. Maybe she'll want to move onto a pump when she's older? Maybe not. Honestly if she can get through her teen years without
a) skipping injections to lose weight
b) having a sky high hba1c

then I think she's doing pretty well.

I got bullied horribly at your daughter's age but that had nothing to do with diabetes,and when my friends got older (yes 15 is the worst) they got kinder. Try to remember both for yourselves and her that 15 does not last forever and things do generally get easier afterwards. Plus puberty absolutely won't help her bgs - yes hormones can make a big difference to some people.

Good luck and try to hang in there. This will pass.
 
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She does well . In the last 3 years never been in dka again her hypos are easy to fix are rare since she and I watch her dex a lot . I’m still up 2 times a night anyways to check her bs and trends on her dex . A habit I’ll never break I don’t trust the alarms . And I know at some point she will step up and manage it herself . I think her being so angry about it lately and being vocal with it is a step that’s needed in this process .
 
I'm t2 not T1, but have a teenage daughter!! They are going through so much at this point in their lives without having the extra worry of t1.

A friend has told me about a great book called The Teenage Brain, it's on my list to read. She says she now understands her teenagers far better and its helping her support them in slightly different ways than before.
 
Hi
I got T1 when I was 16 , oh it was horrendous, I had too many hormones rushing round my body , then a big dose of diabetes on top of that, I didn’ t want it , I hated it all things I guess your daughter is going through, Teenage years are hard enough without diabetes but what she is going through is normal , unfortunately only time and gained experience can change this bit like life really. As Jaylee said try to focus on the positives and just be there for the hard times , like a lot of us older long termers will tell you it really does get easier just take one step at a time and keep focused on the positives
 
Hi
Btw although we type 1s love our pumps these are NOT a magic bullet and often don't give better results than multiple daily injections. ITs just a tool and she has to be ready to use it. There are better pumps on the way like the Tandem IQ (fda approved) and the latest Medtronic one that corrects for highs and lows.
You have my sympathy and you are right to be proud too. By that age I'd acquired an eating disorder partly related to having to count carbs and be weighed a lot.
I really enjoyed listening to this podcast by a type 1 paedeatric consultant who really seems to get it and suggests a way forward.
Also I am always recommending Adam Brown's book Bright Spots and Landmines.
Finally I'd say it is normal to have high insulin resistance for your teens as this a period of massive growth and she won't always be insulin resistant nor will she have done irreversible damage by running a bit high though she will feel a lot better with more blood sugars in range.
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Bright-Spots-Landmines-Diabetes-Someone/dp/069286153X
 
Thanks for all the reply’s . This next week or two is gona be tough she’s going on her first school band choir trip .. 4 days .. of course me as a parent is freaking out inside . And one of the stops is a Willy wonka play with a candy themed meal afterwards ... ugh .. so we have to call the theater and see what is all on the menu she can eat . The band teacher is in all respects a bit clueless . Compared type 1 with her lactose allergy . Ugh . People don’t understand unless they have experienced it first hand I do my best to explain but if falls on deaf ears most of the time . But my daughter is smart knows how to carb count well and we will do are best to make her trip as stress free as we can ..
 
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