Type 1: Not Myself

Getting your head round a diagnosis is extremely tough and we all understand how you're feeling.

Once you adapt to life as a diabetic (and it honestly becomes second nature after a while), things will improve. Both with your condition as well as your sense of wellbeing.

You've come to the right place as this forum has thousands of members who are in the same position as you. You are far from alone and we're all here to listen

gemma-lee said:

Hi everyone. I'm 29 and diagnosed as type 1 in august this year. Since then I've managed to control my diabetes quite well. I've had lots of support from my friends, work and loved ones but my problem is that I feel completely isolated. I've feel I've changed so much as a person and my cautious side is in over drive. I don't feel like me anymore. Before my diagnosis my partner and I were planning a whole new life together; travelling, children, the whole lot. I had just been promoted and looking forward to a fresh start in September. When I was diagnosed it felt like everything came crashing down around me. Everything I've worked for seemed like a distant dream, like I had to start all over again. I feel like I can't do my job properly, that I'm a rubbish partner (we're not intimate any more) and I'm just not myself. I've hidden myself away, even from him, and struggling to see the light at the end of it all. I do have my good days when I wake up and know that I can do this but the darker days will over take this. Is this normal? Will things get better? I'm at a loss and really don't want to let this overwhelm me. I want to be who I was before my diagnosis. Can anyone give me some advice?

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Have you talked to your partner about this.. Your bloke may see things in a different positive way.
"Intimacy"? Again, some of us guys can be "empathic". Out of his respect for you he's giving a bit of space to adjust to the diagnosis..

Hey @gemma-lee welcome to the site

Yes I get everything you are saying, completely.. It does change you yes, you have to accept the changes, it's part of your make up now, just please try and be patient with yourself, be kind to yourself and focus on you. This is a consuming condition it takes a lot to manage it mentally and physically, but and this is a big but, it will get better and so will you. Communication is so important, keep your partner tuned in to you and what's going on, he may feel that this will change things, but fundamentally if he really loves you it will not change anything between you, just try to involve him as much as you can. I have only been diagnosed almost 5 years now and been where you are now and experienced the same emotions, happy to chat anytime so if you need an ear send me a PM, take care lovely

Hi Gemma Lee. You are definitely not alone. We have all had those thoughts and feelings at some point and they can be utterly soul destroying!! I didnt really accept the diagnosis until this year...thats after 6 years! I was looking after myself but the thoughts of how its changed my life chipped away at every part of me. I found help through counselling, perhaps thats something you could consider? The relationship stuff will get figured out but don't shut him out. For him to understand he needs to know exactly whats going on. Give yourself a tremendous break. Its a life altering condition and you need time to wrap your head around at all.

Hi Gemma,
I can completely relate to how you feel! I was diagnosed in August of this year too, I took everything onboard so well when I was first diagnosed, but things have started to get hard for me. I'm struggling to accept the diagnosis, I'm grieving for what I use to have, good health and I was happier. As for your partner he will understand, I found that letting him get as involved as he possibly can is the best, I let him check my blood sugar and inject me whenever I can. If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm always here.
Gemma xxxx

@gemma-lee

Hi Gemma, I am really sorry to hear you are feeling so low. I have been through this, I still go through this.
I have been diabetic since I was very young and I'm 25 now and only just accepting it and getting my health on track.
I feel like I've changed as a person now, but I much prefer the cautious Daisy than the crazy Daisy I was before. I ignored it, drank to excess, smoked, partied, did everything I could to make myself feel like I was 'normal'. It didn't do me any good as my health suffered, which meant my mental state of mind suffered, which meant my relationships suffered and everything else that goes with it.

But do you know what? There is no normal. We are all individuals.
I am currently having work stress (read my post if you like). I feel like I've lost my motivation and drive.
I've had the intimacy issues due to diabetic related problems and feeling completely useless but my partner has been really supportive and I'm sure the love that you both have will enable you to work through it if you have been planning such a wonderful life together. You can still have that life! Diabetes doesn't stop you travelling or having children, you may have to do things differently but at least Diabetes IS manageable as an illness. But you have to share your feelings, don't lock yourself away as there are plenty more of us diabetic ladies who are suffering the same issues.

Things will get better!! Here to chat anytime. xx

I am 30 years diagnosed and can still feel like this at times especially when everything is going pear shaped and I'm getting nowhere. Everyone will have problems at some stage in their life...its life. Talk to your partner he may be worried about you and is giving you time to deal with your diagnosis, everyone hits bumps in their relationships, diabetes and how you are feeling now is your bump! involve him as much as possible he might be feeling as overwhelmed as you. You're in it together. I remember when I was first thinking about going on a pump my main concern was how my boyfriend (now hubby) would see it and feel about it, wasn't even thinking about myself!! Asked him and his reply 'you healthy is my main concern and whatever is needed to keep you healthy and here I'm on board, told me to stop worrying and go for it'. It won't always be like this keep talking and try and accept this is your now now. Off load on the forum as much as you like we've all been there and get exactly where you are coming from. hugs lady xx